August

It was true: we did end up getting fries; but I felt the need to be an ass. I made him drive me to Ryan's, and being Pete, he left and went over to Will's...after doing, of course, a donut in Ryan's driveway. Besides it won't hurt to check up on him. Maybe harass him for his lack of attention for me at all.

I walked in placing the last fry in my mouth and licking my lips. His dogs started barking and going a little farther I got to the living room to see Ryan watching a TV rerun of CSI. He looked almost happy to see me at first, but then he obviously started thinking again judging by the look on his face. I stood awkwardly for a second before sitting in the wing back chair next to the loveseat.

"Get out Brendon."

"No."

"Get-"

"Nope, I'm going to tell you even if you don't want to hear it," I gave the sternest voice possible, it worked because Ryan was listening. You could tell by the way he was trying to watch TV again, but he took his feet off the coffee table and was playing with the volume button.

"I'm pregnant, it's yours and I'm getting an abortion." I licked my lips still tasting salt and pressed them together, Ryan sat there, emotionless. We watched an episode together, partly because I wasn't about to leave due to the fact I was about to pass out and partly because he wasn't trying to kick me out anymore.

"Ryan in two weeks we can pretend this never happened…." Now I was trying to get him to say something, I needed him to say something. This plan wasn't working very well, "We can be friends again."

"Whatever." He sat up and grabbed the paper plate that was on the end of the coffee table and walked into the open floor kitchen. Ryan really knew how to hurt me just by the way he said things.

"Fine! Be a dick," I stood up and was starting to walk out. Ryan froze and looked up at the ceiling with his Adam's apple bobbing with every gulp, "Go fuck someone else, obviously I wasn't the one you were looking for."

"Bren-" He started, but held back, yet again. I didn't feel like prying anything out of him, my statements were truthful and bluntly honest. My heart couldn't take saying anymore things like that to him just to hear unsatisfying answers. So much for the idea of revenge.

I had already taken too much today….

I slammed the front door behind me, looking out to the sunset I walked over the lawn to William's house. Entering Mrs. Beckett directed me to the backyard. If I were blind I'd only would have needed to follow the smell of vodka and expensive perfume following her. Still, something about that smell was oddly comforting.

"Hey!" they erupted together. The two were sitting on the edge of the pool kicking their feet in the water and listening to music. Usually I'd have the urge to push one of them in the pool, but now I just wanted to collapse and cry.

"So how'd it go?" Pete asked as I sat down on the picnic table top.

"Not good," I mumbled and seeing their facial expressions I went on, "He sat there and pretended to watch TV, then he didn't respond to me- he tried kicking me out at first too." I waved my hands in the air out of frustration and the two continued kicking and listening.

"Man, I'm sorry for telling him…" William started, "I thought he'd be more concerned, not an asshole about it."

"I don't even care anymore!" They both looked sympathetic as I shouted at the top of my lungs. Will brushed a piece of hair out of his eyes and Pete took his feet out of the water.

"Come on Bren just relax," Pete tried comforting, "this mood will pass-"

"No, it won't. I want to go home." I said in a near monotone voice, trying not to let my voice crack, as I thought about the boy-next-door. Once you see someone naked it's never the same.

Pete looked at the tile and nodded. By the time he dropped me off it was dark out and rather cold. When I entered my entire family was sitting watching guess what: CSI. I shook my head and went to my room.

Laying on my bed, I looked up at where the white popcorn ceiling met my tan walls. Nothing I knew then was going to make sense anymore.