And We Looked so Good Together

Arlette closed the door behind her and then turned to her high school buddy and her ex boyfriend. She sighed and crossed her arms on her chest. Max and Ronnie are standing side by side in front of the mirror, while she is now slumping on the door, staring down at the floor. After a while, she decided to start speaking up.

“Okay, Ronnie. I know you owe me some explanations.” She began.
“Huh? Explanations?” he asked again.
“Yes. Explanations. How come Max could see you too?”
“Oh, right. Well, the thing is… well, it’s not only Max who could see me…”
“Yea, I know that part, I could see you too…”
“… or you.”
“What?!”
“Yes, well. I’ve never explained this to you guys before, because I thought this is really unnecessary and unimportant. Well, you see, I… uh… err… well, I could… how should I put this? I could “choose” any people I’d like to be able to see me.”
“Okay, so, for instance, if you “chose” Leigh as well, it means she could talk to you, hug you, and all?”
“Yes.”
“And why did you think this was unnecessary and unimportant again?” she said as she tried to keep her anger to not explode.
“I…”
“Look, Arlette. The guy told the truth, and you probably know why he wouldn’t tell you the truth in the first place…”
“No, no I don’t. Really, Max, tell me why, why wouldn’t he tell me the truth since the beginning?” she has lost it.
“Well because he still loves you!” shouted Max finally. And then, there was an awkward silence between the three of them for a while.
“Well, that was nothing new wasn’t it, A?” said Ronnie quietly, breaking the sound of silence.
“So what if you still love me? Why didn’t you tell me the truth anyway?” responded Arlette who has her head down now, her voice cracked.
“Because I still wanted to be special to you. I know that I couldn’t be special in the way Gerard is to you now, because I’m not alive anymore. And so, I thought, if you thought you were the one who could only see me, then I’m still something special to you, you know? I… I’m sorry if we have to come to this. But you know, I was about to propose to you before… before my fate had happened. And you were wrong before, when you said I wasn’t around… I… I’ve watched you and Gerard. And you know what? Gerard is way better than I was. He… he doesn’t yell at you when he’s in a bad mood, he… he doesn’t throw stuff to the ground when you guys are having a fight, and he even accompanies you when you visit me. He’s a perfect guy for you.”

By now, Arlette was drowned in tears. She knew, she knew exactly that Ronnie was right. Gerard is in fact, too good to be true. And Arlette is very, very much lucky to have him. But deep down inside, Gerard has only been just a rebound for her, no matter how perfect he has been. And she feels bad about it too. She had tried and tried so hard to love Gerard the way she had loved Ronnie, but it didn’t work. Even one day, she had considered suicidal so that she could join Ronnie in the afterlife and so that they could get together again. But then again, she couldn’t leave her friends, her family, her Gerard. That would be too selfish of her if she did it.

“M-Max, can you please leave the room?” she asked quietly, she couldn’t have been heard if they didn’t listen close enough. Without any response, Max walked to the door, hugged her for awhile when he got to the door, and then he left the room. Arlette dropped to the floor in front of the door, she is now sobbing again, and she has her face cupped in her hands. By now, her face was totally ruined, but she doesn’t care anymore, she couldn’t take this any longer. She has been living in a lie. Sure, she has had fun with Gerard all of this time, sure, she has had loved Gerard, she has had been feeling happy around him, but it was still different. It was so different than it was when she was with Ronnie. They nearly got in a fight almost all the time, about almost anything. Ronnie wasn’t like Gerard; he was a complete hopeless romantic. But still, Arlette loves him more than she could love Gerard, even until this very second. And she knew that it is such a terrible thing for Gerard if he ever finds out, and she’s not fair that way. But there is nothing she could do about it.

She doesn’t have her face cupped in her hands anymore, she is now calming down, and as she does so, she rubs her eyes with her fingers. Ronnie sighed and decided to sit next to her on the floor. He slowly puts her arms around her, and then he kissed the top of her head. After he got her arms around her, she automatically lays her head on his shoulder, her cheek touches his neck, it feels so cold. And she couldn’t feel any heartbeats on him either. But despite of all this coldness radiating from him, she still feels warm, comfortable, and safe to be in his cuddle. She smiled.

“Can you read minds?” she asked after awhile.
“I’m dead, A. But I’m not sparkling, nor do I read minds and drink blood.” He said.
And then the both of them start laughing.
“You’ve watched that movie?”
“I’ve watched tones of movies. I could be invisible anytime I want, which means I could watch free stuff and all that.”
“Huh. Lucky you. Do you flitter?”
“Uh-huh. I’ve travelled the world. I went to Europe; I went to red carpet moments and all of that. Yea, it’s pretty cool.”
“Are you serious?”
“I’m dead serious!”
“Wow! You’ve met famous people!”
“Yea, well, honestly, I would trade all of that to be alive again. So that I could marry you and give you pretty babies.”
“Oh, Ronnie Baloney, why did you have to die?”
“Yea, well, blame that Michael kid who shot me in the head.”

Arlette closed her eyes. She remembers that night when there was a storm and she couldn’t sleep; she hates the rain. She woke Ronnie up in the middle of the night, and they ended up having hot chocolates with mini marshmallows on bed, up all night with the night lamp on. And then Ronnie grabbed his acoustic guitar and played songs for her, until she finally fell asleep. It was a very long night. She remembers one particular song that Ronnie had played for her that night; Only One by Yellowcard.

I let go, but there’s just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one

Tears start running out of her eyes again, for the thousandth time that day. She had never in her life cried so much, as she knew today that she’d lost something important in her life. She’s not sure what it is, but it couldn’t be Ronnie, as she had lost him. Unless… she quickly has her eyes opened, once again she rubbed her eyes.

“Ro-Ronnie… when are you leaving?” she asked.
“I could leave your party now, if you want…”
“No, no, when are you leaving?”
“Oh, you mean when do I move on to the afterlife?”
“Exactly.”