This Is the World We Left for Dreamers and Believers

> that symbol represents texts.
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“Come on guys, y’all have to go! I said kicking at Jared who was sitting in the floor on the phone.

“Annabel, calm down! You have three hours!” Pat said, patting the seat cushion beside him. I sighed and looked around the living room. Instruments of sorts, paper, and cans of Arizona tea lay scattered around the room. It was going to take me an hour to get rid of the smell of beer that was being masked by Febreeze and covered by a towel. John can’t multi task worth a shit.

“Dude. My couch smells like beer and stinky band guy and the whole house is a mess. How do I convince my parents that y’all can take care of me on tour if we can’t even handle six days in a house?” Kennedy and Garret walked into the room talking about amps or some shit.

“Hey. Your mom called again.” Kennedy said throwing me the lime green Voyager. I caught it and looked down. Two missed calls. Their gonna be pissed.

“Ugh. Can you guys at least clean up a little if your going to stay? Some of these cans, the instruments maybe? Anything.” I said climbing the stairs where it would be quieter. I walked into my room expecting to be able to sit on my bed instead surprised to find John’s sleeping form huddled underneath my black blanket, he snored softly, his mouth hanging half open. It was cute. I didn’t have the heart to wake him. Text it shall be.

>You! You called? I sent it and layer my head down on the polished surface of my desk, the front lit up and told me I had a text.

>Yeah, you have one more day alone. The car won’t start and the part we need is in another store and they won’t get here until ten tonight. We’re not going to make anyone do that.
I sighed. Thank god. John sighed in his sleep and turned over, now facing the wall.

>Okay. That’s cool. I met a couple of friends earlier in the week before y’all left, They’ve been helping me out.

I didn’t want to deal with her anymore. I dropped the phone in the bottom drawer of my desk and grabbed my Mp3 player. Scrolling through I found next to nothing finally settling on a old Fall Out Boy album. You either love em’ or you hate em’. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back, relaxing for the first time in days-months. Patrick Stump’s voice flowed smoothly from the headphones losing me in the lyrics. The memories in the music.

A cold Winter morning on a uncomfortable bus. The bus abuzz with the excitement of a new kid. A shy smile that would turn into my favorite grin. That arms that held me at 5*.

I sighed softly. Remembering hurt so much and trying to forget was like trying to tear my soul out of my chest and throw it in acid. I finally let the tears fall freely, squeezing my eyes shut so I could forget everyone around me. Slow, soft fingers brushed away the tears that were slowly falling down my cheeks. I opened my eyes. John was crouching down in front of me, his eyes searched mine trying to find the reason behind the pain. Failing to find the problem, he was forced to speak.

“What’s wrong?” He whispered. I shook my head, wiping my eyes with my sleeves. He stood up pulling me with him over to my bed, forcing me to sit down. He closed my door, turning back he silently appraised me. I didn’t like his stares.

“What the hell was that about?”

“I’m a girl? Girls have emotions. They cry over stupid things. Example one would be cute songs.”

“Bull shit.” I stared into his green eyes, finally giving up, I layer down on my bed, back to him. My pillows now reeking of his smell.

“You made my bed smell like dude.”

“It smells like clean dude though.” He said now sounding closer. I shrugged. The bed shifted, he stroked my hair a second before I turned to him.

“Hmm?” He looked sad. It was heart wrenching. John placed a hand on each side of my head and leaned down, his forehead touching mine.

“I wish you would talk to me. Someone. Anyone. I want to know you Annabel but your making it very hard.” He said, I looked away from his eyes.

“It’s my past, John. Why should it matter? It’s not about the past anymore. I just want to focus on the future from now on.”

“That’s impossible if your going to sit in occupied rooms and cry.”

“It was mine to begin with.” He laughed.

“Well get a guest room and I’ll have another bed to sleep in.”

“Go home.”

“You don’t want that.” He said, his voice losing the mocking tone it held only moments ago.

“How do you know?”

“You wouldn’t let me do this.” He said pressing his lips to my own. Chapped from biting on them in times of stress but soft none the less. I didn’t want it…..I did……I didn’t know what I wanted. He pulled away, smiling confidently.

“I think you should go downstairs.” I said looking at the wall. His smile fell and he sat up.

“Did I do something wrong?” I followed his actions, leaning my head on my arms that rested on my knees.

“Isn’t that the girls line?” A smirk pulled at the corners of his mouth.

“Maybe. You didn’t answer me.”

“I’m confused….about everything. I just moved, made amazing friends who are going to help me with my dream and I happen to like you a lot but what if I messed all that up with a relationship? I’m not ready for anything yet. Give me time. We’ve got time honey.” He smiled, his fingers brushed across my cheek.

“I’ve only got forever and forever’s just fine.” He quoted. The Cab= <3

“Vegas Nights. It’s my favorite.”

“I know. You had it on repeat for three days straight.” I laughed.

“I tend to do that. Uhm by the way y’all can stay over tonight but your gonna have to either leave really early or get caught.”

“Their staying another day?” I shook my head.
“Car issues.”

“I’ll pass along the message. You coming downstairs?” He asked, his hand resting on the doorknob.

“Nah. I’ve got friends to catch up with, I’ll be down later.” He walked out, waving. “Hey, John?” He back tracked into the doorway.

“Yeah?”

“Next time won’t be so bad.” I said, he smiled, shaking his head and walked downstairs. So, I’d left in an attempt to forget everything else instead getting it just as bad with new friends, confusions and the fear of everything coming out. It wasn’t a pleasant thought to think I’d have to explain to them everything. The sad looks and special treatment from them just wasn’t my forte.