A Blink of an Eye

The first person to mind was of course Justin. There was no doubt about it. His phone rang and rang and with each ring I started to think that this wasn't such a good idea. He was probably still mad about everything else. That's why he wasn't answering. Then on the fifth ring, right as I was about to hang up, his voice comes through the phone.
"Jess? What's wrong?" Justin says. I wonder how he knew what was wrong then I remembered that school was in and I wouldn't call unless it was important, and plus I was sobbing into the phone.
"J-Justin, I need you." I say. I hear him take a deep breath and sigh.
"Need me for what?" Justin replies after a few seconds.
"I'm at the hospital. And I can't do this by myself." I say slowly trying to calm myself and stop crying.
"Why did you call me? Why not Joe?" Justin says. I pause thinking, and while that happens I hear him walking.
"Jess? You there?" Justin says even though I knew he could hear me breathing.
"Yes, I'm here. I don't why." I say realizing just how true this is.
"Oh, well, I'm on my way." Justin says and I hear his car start.
"Ok, thanks." I say. Justin's coming, I tell myself trying not to start crying again. I think about Justin's question, he's right. Why didn't I just call Joe? Why would I call him when Joe is closer to Selena than him? And I was avoiding him at the moment. Then I start to wonder if he was still upset. If he was hurting, because of me. If coming here was just going to hurt him more, if me not being able to tell him why i choose him to call hurts him. All that just sent me into another round of sobbing. I had no clue why. Justin meant the world to me, he was easily my best friend. I couldn't stand to hurt him.
As I was waiting outside, crying, a guy happened to pass by.
"Are you ok miss?" the guy asks stopping in front of me.
I shake my head and he asks "Do you need help?"
I look up in his eyes and actually see that this guy cares. I shake my head and mumble "Thanks but no thanks."
He shrugs and walks away. I watch him go and he glances over his shoulder to make sure one last time that I don't need help. It made me feel nice to know that some people in this world had a life where they actually cared for others. This random man helped me feel better but not good enough to stop crying.
Justin came a few seconds after the man left. I could still see the man. He was farther away now, still checking over his shoulder, but when he saw Justin come up and wrap me in his arms he didn't look back again. I guess he thought I was in good hands, and if so, he's right.
"Let's go in." Justin says.
I grab his hand and we walk in side by side. I take a deep breath as I see Selena again. This time she sees me too. She runs to me and wraps her arms around me.
"Thank you so much for coming. I really need you here." Selena says.
"I know. And that's why I'm here." I say.
I know she can tell that I've been crying and I know she wants to know why Justin is with me but she just smiles and pulls us over to where she was sitting. But just as we sat down the doctor came and took her back. I wanted to go with her but he said that it wasn't a good idea. So that left me and Justin, alone, in the waiting room, which happened to be empty. Great...
"Jessica, why did you call me? I mean, you've been avoiding me all morning." Justin says suddenly breaking the silence.
"Justin, I really don't know. I was upset and you were the first person that came to mind." I reply quietly.
"Of course..." Justin mumbles like he was expecting something different.
"Justin? Can I ask you something?" I ask slowly trying to decide if I should ask.
He looks at me and nods.
"Was what Josh said true? Did I make you upset last night? Did I hurt you?" I ask in a hurry then as soon as I do I regret it, because Justin turns away from me. He doesn't say anything and refuses to look at me.
"Forget it." I mumble.
"No, I'll tell you. Yes, I was upset last night." Justin says still refusing to look at me.
"Why?" I ask totally confused.
"You were so worried about Matt, and then you were hugging him and so happy when we found him. I just didn't get why he made you so happy when he hurt you and when all he had to do was show up when for the past few months all I've been trying to do is make you feel better and it doesn't seem to work." Justin says. Towards the end his voice sort of cracks, I wonder if he's crying.
"So it made you mad that I was happy?" I ask.
"No, I was happy that you were happy. I was mad because I've been trying to make you happy for a while and I don't get what I'm doing wrong." Justin says his voice thick. He still won't look at me and I'm pretty sure he's crying.
"You're not doing anything wrong. You're always here when I need you." I say patting his hand.
"Yea, ok but that doesn't seem to help. Jess, why do you always have to call me? I hate to say it but you have to know it hurts me to see you like this and then not be able to make you happy. Why do you do it? Do you enjoy watching me get hurt." Justin says finally getting really angry. I'm confused and hurt. I didn't know what to do or to say but all I really knew was that this might be the moment where Justin finally gets sick of me.
"You know that I don't." I reply stiffly.
"Really? Do I? Then why in the hell do you always call me?" Justin says finally looking at me. I was right his eyes are red from crying.
"Why do you always come?" I say as I feel tears form in my eyes.
"Because no other girl compares to you! And all I want is to see you happy and every time I think I can and every time you prove me wrong." Justin basically yells at me.
"Justin, why are you always there for me?" I say as the first tear falls.
"I've told you that already." Justin mumbles looking away again.
"No, you said you come to make me happy but it never works so why bother? Why are you always there for me?" I say as another tear falls.
Waiting for his reply, I realize that we've been standing this whole time.
He doesn't reply and he won't look at me. He has his head turned and even though he's trying not to let me see, I see tears falling. That causes mine to come down harder until it's blurry. He glances at me, barely, and then shakes his head and walks away, never looking back.
I stand there staring down the hallway that he went down begging for him to come back. Part of me wanted to chase after him and I would've but I couldn't make my legs move. Finally, I fall into a chair and just cry. I had just lost my best friend, I'm sure of it. There was no way after all that, that he would ever be there for me again.