Promise Not to Break My Little Heart or Leave Me All Alone

It has been three months ever since I talked to Ryan. Even if I try to make myself believe that I forgot about him already, a small part of me still remembered and hurt. The henna is now completely erased from my skin but the memories were still there. I wonder if I’ll ever see him again. Maybe he’ll ignore me and neglect the fact that we know each other. I sigh as I thought about this. I’ve never thought about him in a month now and here I am, thinking about him again. I should really forget it. Maybe if he didn’t kiss me that night, I wouldn’t be that affected that he left with no goodbye but because he did kiss me, I feel like I was used. Perhaps I was just a fling to him. Of course, I am nothing but a fling.

I slowly walk in my practical arts class. I liked this subject the most because we actually do something. We get to practice our skills unlike subjects like history wherein we just sit and listen to whatever the teacher says. I happily sit on my chair as the teacher gave his instructions.

We were supposed to draw how we felt that moment. We need to express it through drawing. How did I feel now anyway? I don’t even know. I pretended to just feel happy and I started to draw something that will show that I am happy. I was getting lost in my own little world already when someone knocked on our classroom door. I didn’t bother looking anymore, afraid that I would lose my concentration.

“Good morning Mr. Thompson, can I please speak to Natasha?’ I hear a familiar voice.

“Ah! My favorite student! You remember me?” Our teacher exclaimed and walked to the door

I slowly lift my head to look at the person who spoke. I froze when low and behold, I saw Ryan. Ryan, the guy I met in the beach. Ryan, the person who left me without a word. Why was he here?

“Hey Mr. Thompson!” he smiled

I can hear everyone talking and murmuring. Why did Ryan cause this much commotion? He was only Ryan, did they know him?

“Oh, class, the famous Ryan Ross!” Our teacher announced in the class

“Hey! Ryan I love you!” Christine squealed behind me

Did they know each other? Why did she randomly say that to Ryan? I am so confused now

“Thanks” Ryan smiled to her

His gaze scanned the room and stopped right at me. I quickly looked down on my table.

“Why are you here?” I hear our teacher ask

“Actually, I need to talk to someone in your class. Natasha.” He said

I looked down more and didn’t move. Why did he have to say this in front of the class? This is so embarrassing.

“Oh! Natasha! She is a very good artist. How do you know her?” our teacher asked curiously

“It’s really a long story. I really need to talk to her now actually. Can I?” Ryan inquired

“Sure, sure! Natasha?” our teacher called to me

Oh fuck. What will I do now? I wasn’t ready for this at all.