Don't Mess with Us, We Kick A- I Mean, Prod Buttock

Ruthie's POV

Emz! At last! I see her walking with Zara, Cherri and Nova and my heart leapt.
I love her. I can't help it. I admit it...
At least, I admit it to myself...
Oh, why couldn't I just come out with it and tell her?
"Emz!" I said joyfully as she came into view.
"Ruthie," she said, smiling at me.
I loved her so much.
"Where are we going?" said Abbi.
"To harrass and rape little kids," said Kath.
Everyone looked at her.
"Good idea," said Jess.
"So...where are we going?" asked Abbi, again.
"To the shopping centre. Near the lil kiddies play area," said Zara, giggling evilly.
I exchanged a look with Hurly. I'm sure she wouldn't approve of this...
But then she grinned and said, "And maybe, afterwards, we can blow it up!"
I shook my head. Mental. But it did sound so fun...
Dammit, hadn't my therapy worked?
Abbi was being crazy again, obviously not having taken her medication. She was dancing around, waving her hands in the air.
Oh god, please don’t start singing, not now…
It didn’t work. Abbi sang. People started giving us funny looks.
So I joined in. So did Fred.
Together, we scared these two toddlers to death. LITERALLY! Mwahahahaha. No, jokes, they didn’t really die, but it was a close call.
We all linked arms and skipped through the shopping centre, singing at the top of our voices. Happy times.
Kath fell over, because she was drunk, and dragged Zara down, who in turn dragged Emz down, and so forth. We all ended up in a giggling heap, apart from Kath, who was suffocating underneath us, and Zara, who’s chocolate bar had melted in her pocket and exploded everywhere coz it got squashed
I swear I saw one woman phone the police. Maybe coz Jess was humping Nova on the top of the pile, so I poked everyone until they got up. Apart from Kath, who was unconscious.
We picked Kath up and hurried away from the woman.
I swear she was looking at Emz’s arse. I was tempted to drop Kath and go back and punch her, but Emz smiled at me and made my legs go gooey.
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Cherri’s POV

Utterly mental, all of them. Us, I should say. They banned us all from going in the same toilets [I don’t know WHAT they thought we would do in there!] so we split up and went to different ones, planning to meet back in fifteen minutes.
“Why can’t we just pretend to be men?” wailed Fred, “We’ve done it before!”
“Coz,” said Zara, firmly.
“Coz?” asked Abbi.
“Coz they’ve seen us and there some creepy pervy perves perving on us right now so I think maybe we should all split up and hopefully the creepy perves won’t follow me but stick here with you,” said Ruthie.
Nova blinked. “What?”
Ruthie shook her head. “Doesn’t matter.”
I went with Jess and Emz to the loos.
“I’m pretty sure those creepy perves are following us,” I said to them.
Jess stuck her tongue out at me. “Coz we are SEXY!”
“I’m serious!”
They didn’t listen.
So when we came out of the loos and they grabbed us, they merely stared.
I took out my phone and ran, calling Zara as I did so.
“Hey, Zara’s sex-at-home company here, how may I help?”
“ZARA! WE’RE BEING FUCKIN’ KIDNAPPED!”
“That’s nice, do you want any sexual services with that?”
“I’M SERIOUS!” Why didn’t anyone listen to me?
They got me, my phone skidding across the floor.
They took us away, and locked us in a boot, where I was uncomfortably close to Jess’…bits. They were in my face actually.
I wasn’t happy.