Her HeartNecklace is broken

“You terd munch, what were you thinking?”

CHARLES’ POV.
I looked down the hallway, as I saw Wednesday walk away. She paused for a second, and yelled “screw you” to me. Obviously, it hurt hearing that. I love her. Or, I loved her, as far as she knows. She’ll never know about my feelings for her, because every time I do my best to show them, she pushes me away. Wednesday is beautiful. Her brown hair with it’s tint of blond in it, always seemed so beautiful to me. And, I can’t deny that her beautiful blue and green eyes were amazing. She was pale, and sure, most people don’t like that, but I’d pick her over Natalie any day. But, I can’t. I can’t pick her over Natalie, because fact of all this is, I can’t hurt Wednesday again. And, as I walk the hallways in school, I hate that she thinks she’s the only one who’s affected here. Sure, I brought this all upon myself, and happened to drag Wednesday with me, but she doesn’t hear what I hear. As I walk the hallway, I know everyone’s thinking of her. As Natalie walks the hallway, the thought of “whore” [I hate these stupid categories, people act as if they actually matter] pops in their head. As I walk down the hallway, and act like nothing’s bothering me, everyone thinks of how I hurt Wednesday, and yet not an ounce of guilt for mocking her, do they feel. Obviously, they don’t see her like I do. They don’t see her pain, and they don’t realize what she goes through.

People haven’t been there for her. No one sees her, except the people who choose to. I see her. I never want to not see her. I want her to know that I’m still there for her. Wednesday’s dad died when she was eight. He got into crack, and eventually died. You can’t mix up drugs with down ones. He got into cardiac arrest, and died. She told me everything about it, from when she came home, and how her dad was on the floor. She said, “I remember looking into his eyes, and wanting to just say ‘Wake up daddy’ and actually, see him get up. But, he never did. He never will. I was suppose to see him that Tuesday. I’ll be waiting for that wonderful Tuesday, for the rest of my life - Until death.” No one gets that. No one wants to.
Her mom isn’t dead, she’s alive. Wednesday lives with her mother, too. But, she might as well live on her own. Her mom deals drugs, and is an alcoholic. She barely feeds Wednesday, and somehow, Wednesday manages to make it. Ever since she was eight, she realized the tough reality of the drug world and that was her life, and reality. When we turn eighteen, we were suppose to get married, and run away together. I was suppose to be her prince charming. So, when people tell me that Wednesday is anorexic, I know she is. But, I was helping her with that. Christina was helping her with that. I doubt that though. I doubt it because, she’s pushing us all away. She’s pushing Christina away, and I pushed myself distant. I ruined it with her.

After school, I got a phone call. There was a voicemail on my mail box.

“I loved you! You hurt me! So you can know, I’m dying because of you!” A frantic voice yelled. I know that voice. It was Wednesday. In the background of the voicemail, I heard a speeding car’s engine roaring and a splash. The phone line went dead. Immediately after that, I called Wednesday’s mother.
“Is Wednesday okay?” I said, frantic to find out what had just happened.
“No. She’s at the damn hospital!” Her mother replied, and hung up.

I raced to the hospital. Once I reached the parking lot, I ran to the waiting room at the hospital. I saw Christina in the E.R. crying. She was as pale as a vampire.

“Charles, she’s not okay. She’s not going to be okay. She’s in critical condition! I don’t know what to do!” Christina said, wiping away tears. It was almost hard to see if she could even see my through her heavy tears. This was a nightmare.
“What happened to her?” I asked, trying to remain calm, while all these emotions rushed through me.
“She drove off a bridge. They said, there were no skid marks. She tried to kill herself. She fell out of the car as it was landed, and landed into the water. She started to drown and the car door hit her. They said, she isn’t going to be okay. They said, that she’s in critical condition and might not wake up from the coma.” Christina said, sounding like she was the one who was dying. She loves Wednesday.
“What do we do?” I asked, fighting back the hardest tears.
“I don’t know. I can’t.. I can’t sit here and know my best friend is dying.” She said, and she was right.
“Where’s her mom?” I asked, thinking of how she had answered the phone.

Immediately, I called her mother. No one answered the phone.
“She’s not here because she has company over. As in her little clients. The addicts are all over her house.” Christina said, obviously annoyed. I then called Natalie.
“Hey babe, there’s an emergency. I can’t hang out tonight.” I told Natalie. She understood and I hung up.

“Nurse? Nurse?” I asked, trying to get the nurse’s attention.
“Yes son? How can I help you today?” she replied.
“I need to see my girl.” I said. I can’t stand here, waiting. I need to be with her.

I walked through the doors, and went to her room. She lay there motionless, and it was so uneasy to look at the marks. Her left arm, covered in cuts and bruises, with an I.V. at the crease of her elbow. Her right arm, covered in a cast. There was blood stains through the bandages that wrapped around her chest. From the waist down a blanket covered her. Her hair looked like it was damp, but it wasn’t. There was blood on her face, and a bruise going around the left side of her face. She looked so pale, I couldn’t take it.

I walked over to Wednesday’s side, and pulled up a chair. I grabbed her motionless hand, and kissed her forehead. I felt tears fall down my face, as I stroked Wednesday’s beautiful hair. I knew she wouldn’t wake up. So, I thought if I talked to her maybe she could hear my anyways. I needed to tell her everything.

“Wednesday, I can’t believe you did that. I can’t believe I’m losing you, and I can’t do a damn thing about it. I look at you, I see so much beauty. I see so much that I lost, and how I really miss you. It’s like, now that your gone, I know what alone really means. Sure, I have Natalie, but she’ll never be like you. She just wants lust, love is lust to her. To you, there’s so much meaning behind it. There’s so much more to it. Now that I’ve messed up, it’s like everything’s changing. It’s like, my world’s upside down and I can’t even do anything about it. It’s killing me inside, it really is. You walked out, because of some crap that I did. You think I’ve moved on, but there’s really no where for me to go. Now that I’ve hurt you, I don’t believe there is any way I can forgive myself. I always knew you were too good for me. It seems like it’s all a night mare, like this is all my worst fears. I just wish you could hear me, and maybe then you’d know I am so sorry, babe. I can’t take it. I love you.” I said. I had just opened my whole heart, and completely let myself become honest and finally let someone know how much I loved her. But, she can’t even hear me.

Christina came walking through the doors. She took one look at Wednesday and vomited, completely covering the floor where she stood. She broke into tears, harder than before. She fell to the ground and pleaded for God to give Wednesday one more chance.

I ran over to Christina, who was shaking all over her body.
“Why? Why the hell did you do this?” She said, almost yelling at me, but it was nearly impossible for her to yell when she’s crying.
“I didn’t.” I replied. Unable to comprehend the meaning of this.
“Yes, you damn did. You did this! You’re the reason she’s laying in this bed. You’re the reason she’s unconscious. You know, I hope you really know, you’re a monster. You’re going to burn in hell for this, yeah you are. I hope this all tortures you at night, knowing if you hadn’t hurt her like this, maybe she wouldn’t have attempted suicide! Maybe, I’d still have my best friend and I’d be texting her, and she’d be happy. She told you every God damn thing! If Chris were here, he would kill you. You know that? He would. He loved her way more than you’ll ever know, and Wednesday completely loved him. She wouldn’t be in this whole situation if you hadn’t done this. What the hell. When you hurt her, I want to know. You terd munch, what were you thinking? I hope this eats at you inside, and it kills you when you think about it. I hope you don‘t sleep at night, and you cry thinking about this. I hope you know, how much I hate you right now. How much I regret ever introducing her to you, cause she‘d be doing wonderful without you.” She sounded so annoyed, angry, it was almost as if she was going to kill me. As if, she was going to attack her right then and there. I was so upset with all of this.

It was true. If she didn’t know me, maybe she’d be alive. If I didn’t cheat on her, maybe she’d still be with me. I effed up a lot.

“Christina. I love her, more than anything and anyone. Right now, I’d die to be in her place. I’d rather be laying on the bed, than her. I’d rather her be happy than me ever smile. She was my life, and I was drunk when I did that with Natalie. She’ll never know how sincerely sorry I am. How much I really wish I could take it all back, and just be with her. I’ll never meet anyone like her, and I know it. I know it, and I wish I didn’t have to sit here and watch her die right now. I love her.” I said, my voice constantly cracking because of the tears.

“You heard these very meaningful three words from Wednesday. ‘I love you’ was what she told you, what she meant to you. You know what? Well, I have three words of my own for you. Go screw yourself.” Christina said to me, shoving the nurse who was cleaning up the barf out of the way. This is what I did.

I miss her.