Oh. It's You

As the door banged shut, I turned around to face Kevin, watching as he rushed around our room, throwing clothes into his holdall, “Why are you going?” I asked weakly.
Kevin stopped for a second and turned to face me, a smile spreading across his face for a minute, “We have to go to this party thing tomorrow, then the next day we’re doing a surprise free concert that won’t be announced until that morning, then we come back. It won’t be that long, really.”
I nodded slowly, “Okay…” I whispered, as he started packing again.
Joe burst into the room, looking flustered, his hair slightly messed up, “Ready, Kev?” He asked.
I raised and eyebrow. “What the hell were you up to?”
He was about to open his mouth when Nick appeared beside him, his holdall in his hands, “Can we please go…before I die?” He asked in a pained voice.
“What happened now?” Kevin asked, sounding tired.
“She….boxed me.” Nick said quietly.
Kevin zipped up his bag, “What did you do this time?”
“Me?! It was her fault!” Nick said, trying to defend himself.
“Seriously, dude?” Joe asked.
“I said goodbye, and she was really happy, and I tried to kiss her and she punched me in the stomach, and it hurt.” Nick said quietly, one hand still covering his stomach, while he held his holdall in the other hand.
Joe coughed to hide laughter, but his shoulders were shaking,
I saw Kevin smirk, “Do you ever learn?” He asked.
“She does love me, somewhere deep, deep down.” Nick said seriously.
Joe laughed aloud, “So you are delusional. Ready to go?”
Nick glared at him, “I’m not delusional. And yes, we’re ready.”
“Sure you’re not.” Joe said sarcastically. “Kevin, come on!” Joe said grinning.
Kevin rolled his eyes, as he walked over towards me, “There’s going to be one big long conversation about how Nick is delusional the next few hours.” He said quietly, taking my hand, and pulling me into a close hug, “I love you, and I’ll see you soon.” He said quietly, as he kissed me lightly, then smiled and walked out the door as his dad called for them impatiently. As they disappeared, I sat down on the bed, my head now spinning, I still felt extremely sick, but now I was dizzy. I lay down on the bed, and closed my eyes, “Lauuurrrrreeeeeennnnn!” Rachael’s voice filled the room, and I sat upright,
“What?!”
“Lets party!” She squealed.
I stared at her blankly, “Where’d cold, bitter, angry Rachael go?”
She glared slightly but the smile stayed on her face. “Nick is gone! For two whole days! I don’t have to stay in the same room as him! I’m brilliant! Now lets party!”
“But I don’t feel well.” I complained.
“And my human punching bag is gone for forty eight hours, we can’t have it all.” She said lightly.
I stared at her, “I feel sick, you just miss Nick, big difference.”
She shook her head quickly, “I don’t miss Nick, I miss hurting him.”
“You still miss him.” I said steadily.
She rolled her eyes, “Let’s not mention his name, let’s not mention those icky brothers again, lets party!”
I stared at her, “Do you not understand the words, I.feel.sick.”
She shook her head, “No, I don’t.”
I glared at her, “I want to go to bed.”
She grabbed my hand, and pulled me up off the bed, and dragged me into Joe’s room, where Emily was on her laptop, and had earphones on, and singing at the top of her lungs, so she was oblivious to the fact we were even in the room.
“Oh, didn't I, didn't I, didn't I see you crying
I want you to want me
I need you to need me
I'd love you to love me
And I'm begging you to beg me
I want you to want me
I want you to want me
I want you to want me
And I want you to want me!”
Rachael made a face, still holding my arm so I wouldn’t crawl back to my room, “EMILY!” She screamed.
Emily jumped, and tried to sit up, instead, falling off the bed and hitting the floor with a loud thud. “Ouch.” She moaned.
Rachael’s shoulders were shaking with silent laughter, and Emily threw a glare at her, “What do you want?” She snapped, glancing back at her laptop.
“Lets do something. Celebrate the Jonai leaving.” Rachael asked. “Oh, that reminds me, I need to check my e-mails.” She said, looking at Emily’s laptop.
“What are you planning to do?” Emily asked, sitting back on the edge of the bed.
“Watch a movie, get away from this icky house that has something Jonai every corner, how about we go watch Night At The Museum 2, I haven’t seen that yet, and it’s not Jonai!”
Emily tried to keep a straight face, “Yeah…sure…no Jonai.”
I raised an eyebrow, Sure, they’re only naked cherubs after all….
Emily made a face at me to try tell me not to mention that.
“So, we go now? The next showing is like in fifteen minutes.”
“Sure!” Emily said standing up.
“I think I’ll just go to bed…” I mumbled.
“No, you’re coming with us.” Rachael said seriously.
“So, does that give me permission to puke over you?” I asked seriously.
“You won’t, don’t worry.” Emily said quickly.
“How do we get to the cinema then? Because if we have to walk, I’m going to bed.” I said quietly.
“I’m sure Denise will love to give us a lift.” Emily said lightly.
Rachael sighed, “I was hoping there would be no Jonas involved, how wrong was I?”
“More than you would think.” Emily said, smirking slightly.
Rachael mumbled something incoherent under her breath.
We walked downstairs, finding Denise with Frankie, watching T.V.
“Denise, if it’s not too much trouble would you be able to bring us to the cinema so we can watch Night at the museum two?” Emily asked.
Denise looked confused for a minute, then nodded, “Of course. And then you can give me a call when you all want a lift back.”
Emily nodded, “Thank you so much.”
Denise grabbed her coat, and Frankie followed her, “Okay then, lets go.”
“Yay.” Rachael said flatly.

~oOo~

We were sitting down in the movie theatre, and I was just waiting for the first bit with the cherubs. As it came closer, I saw Emily’s shoulder shake with silent laughter. Rachael threw her a confused look, I was smiling lightly, but still felt sick, but Emily was shaking with laughter when the ‘Cherubs’ appeared, when they started singing, Rachael’s mouth dropped open, “Oh my fucking Gee.” She said aloud. “You have got to be fucking kidding me.” She hissed, before starting to bang her head against the seat.
“Rachael, stop!” Emily hissed.
“Noooooo! It burrrrrrrnnnns!” She moaned.
“Rachael.” Emily hissed.
“I’m being stalked….by Nick Jonas….ewwwww.”
“You’re married to him, Rachael.” Emily reminded her.
“THAT JUST MAKES IT FUCKING WORSE!” She screamed.
A woman behind us, that was with three children, tapped her on the shoulder, “Would you mind either being quiet, or getting out?”
Rachael turned around, throwing s glare at the woman, “Do NOT interrupt me in teaching your children how to fucking swear woman!” She growled.
The woman glared at her, “Get out before I call security on you.”
“Umm, missus, do you OWN the fucking cinema? No. So shut the fuck up. And also, can you SEE the horror you're subjecting your children to?”, She said, gesturing at the singing Jonai, “It's horrible, and probably a form of child abuse.”
The woman looked at her, cautioning her, “I don’t own the cinema, but what you’re saying it isn’t good for my children to hear.”
“Then get out, they’ll figure it out eventually if they aren’t retards.” She replied.
“You should get out, you don’t seem to be enjoying this anyway, my children were.”
Then security came and dragged Rachael out of the theatre….she was back in about two minutes..
She sat down beside Emily and dusted her hands off, “All done.”
Emily raised an eyebrow, “What do you mean ‘done’?” She asked.
Before Rachael could reply I interrupted, “Rachael, is that blood on your shirt?”
Rachael smiled innocently, “I didn’t just seriously hurt those guards…”
We looked at her questionably,
“Nope, no way…and I don’t still have a knife, no way….not a chance…”
“What the hell did you do?” I hissed.
She shrugged, “Like I said, I didn’t do nothing, and you can’t prove I did.”
I felt sicker now, and I passed by Emily and Rachael, and ran down the steps of the theatre, getting weird looks, as I dashed out of the door, seeing the sign for the bathroom, I ran into it, and into a stall just in time before I puked. I hated being sick, I hated it, so much, it scared me, but it was gross.
I went to the sink, and tried to splash water on my face, when I heard the door open, Emily and Rachael walked in, “Um, Lar? What the holy beGeesus is wrong with you? You look freakin’ awful.” Rachael asked.
I stared at her weakly, “Maybe because I just puked?”
She made a face, “Ewwwwww, don’t infect me!”
I stared at her blankly. “How lovely.”
Emily looked up from her phone, “Denise will pick us up in a few minutes, are you okay? You don’t look okay?” She asked.
“I’m pretty shit.” I said bluntly.
“You look shit.” Rachael said cheerily.
I glared at her, “And that’s a good thing now?”
“Well I’m not sick, so it’s a good thing to me.” She replied.
“Do you want me to make you sick?” I threatened.
Emily grabbed my arm, “NO! Stop it, now!”
“Why? I’m sick?” I moaned.
“So?” Rachael asked.
Emily growled, “Stop, and lets go and find Denise.”
When we got into the car, Rachael got into the front seat, Denise looked slightly shocked, Frankie sat beside the window in the back, Emily in the middle, and me at the other side. They had told me to open my window, it might help more. I doubted it.
When we arrived home, Denise put her hand on my shoulder, “Are you going to be okay?” She asked gently.
I felt like I was going to puke again, “No…I’m going to-” Before I finished the sentence, I ran up the stars, into Kevin’s room, and into the en suite, puking into the toilet. Help me….

*Emily’s P.O.V*

As Lauren raced up the stairs, Denise turned to Rachael and me, a worried expression on her face, “Does she have allergies to something, did I give her something that she’s allergic to?” She asked, talking quickly.
“No, she’s not allergic to anything, don’t worry, I’ll go look after her.” I said quietly.
“Are you sure?” Denise asked.
I nodded, “You take Rachael and Frankie, I’ll take Lauren.”
Rachael and Denise both looked at me, “I don’t need to be looked after, thank you very much.” Rachael snapped.
“Trust me, you do.” I said seriously.
Before she could answer, Denise interrupted her, “I’ll mind Rachael, she and Frankie can talk…and stuff.”
I nodded, “I’d better go up to Lauren then.”
“I could look after Lauren!” Rachael butted in.
I turned to look at Rachael, “And what’s your version of ‘looking after’ someone sick?” I asked.
She shrugged, “Hit them over the head, so they get knocked out, then they can’t get sick, see all better?”
Denise bit her lip, “Emily, you go look after Lauren, I’ll come up and check on her later.”
I nodded, “Okay!” and I ran upstairs, into Kevin’s room, seeing the en suite door open. “Lauren?” I called.
“What?” I got a blunt reply back from the en suite.
“You okay, sweetie?” I asked, walking into the en suite, seeing Lauren sitting on the floor, with her head back resting against the wall, she was as pale as a ghost.
“What’s wrong with you?” I asked, as I knelt down beside her.

*Rachael’s P.O.V*

I was sitting in the kitchen, at the table, absentmindedly tapping my fingers against the wood., Frankie was watching me, I could feel those icky Jonai eyes watching me, it made my skin crawl. Frankie was looking around, and had a terrified look in his eyes, I guess he was afraid I might hurt him, great!
Silence….too much silence….my iPod’s upstairs….gaah….
“Hey, Frankie, do you want to learn some cool things?” I asked.
Frankie looked up at me, his eyes wide with shock that I had spoken to him, and he nodded meekly. “Sure.”
I smirked, “Don’t look so scared, they’re vital life skills.”
“Like what? Praying?” Frankie asked.
I shuddered at the thought, “Eh, no. Like how to use a microwave properly, and say stuff in three languages.”
“Aw, cool! Mom’s always trying to make me learn new languages.”
“Okay, Irish first.” I said, “Repeat after me, ‘An soith tú?’”
He stared at me blankly, “What does that mean?”
“Are you a dog.” I answered with a straight face.
“What kind of dog?” He asked.
“A girl dog.” I answered.
“You’re teaching me how to swear!” He said suddenly, his eyes wide, and his mouth wide.
I stared at him, “Duh. You didn’t think I’d teach you common courtesy did you?” I said shrugging.
His mouth which had been open wide, turned into a wide smile, “You’re my new favourite!”
“Great, now, can I go back to teaching you how to swear?” I asked.
“Sure!”
“Okay, lets move onto Spanish, Irish is hard to curse in.” I said rolling my eyes. “Repeat after me, ‘Vete a la mierda’”
“Vete a la mierda.” Frankie said clearly, “What does that mean?” He asked.
“Fuck off.” I replied.
“Cool!”
“Now to English, Stupid, bastard, motherfucking, golden child, thinks the the sun shines out of his ass, I wish I could stick something up his fucking ass, but knowing that asshole he’d probably like that.” I said quickly.
Frankie stared at me, “Uh…..stupid…You said that way too fast.” He said accusingly, throwing a slight glare at me.
Wow, glaring already, this kid learns fast! “Okay then, Mikey, since you learn so fast now to kitchen appliances, toaster or microwave?” I asked.
He stared at me confused, “I’m Frankie, not Mikey.” He said matter of factly.
“No shit Sherlock.” I mumbled, “Think of it as a pet name, you are now Mikey Fuckin’ Way”
“Cool! Microwave then!”
“Great.” I said slyly. “Do you have any tinned beans in the house?” I asked.

*Emily’s P.O.V*

“So you’re sure you can look after her for the next couple of hours?” Denise asked as she walked towards the door.
“Yes, Denise. I can.” I answered for the billionth time.
“I’ll be up in about an hour okay?”
“Yes, Denise.”
There a clingy noise downstairs. “Was that the doorbell?” She asked confused.
“No, Denise. It sounds like pots being taken out…”
Denise looked confused for a minute, “Why-”
BANG
“Oh dear Lord save me.” She said rushing out the door.
“Three bags fucking full, Denise.” I said under my breath.
“I heard that!” Denise called from downstairs.
I froze, shit.
“Oh my God! What were you two doing in here?!” She screeched.
I slouched slightly, Phew…
I went over to shut the door,
“We made beans!” I heard Frankie proclaim loudly. As I shut the door, kids.

~2 Days Later~

She can’t go to sleep, why can’t that fucking bitch go to sleep?! I haven’t slept in forty seven hours, thirty five minutes, three seconds and two milliseconds, like seriously, she can’t have anything else left to throw up, how is this possible?
Lauren rolled around to her side in bed, and moaned slightly as if she was going to puke again, I looked at the alarm clock, 5:30 A.M, I pushed a stray strand of her hair out of the way, “Go to sleep, sweetie. It’s five in the morning.” Yes, go to fucking sleep, it’s five in the fucking A fucking M. Go to fucking sleep! So I can go to fucking sleep! Please, go to fucking sleep.
She rolled over again and started to snore softly, Hallejulia! Hallejulia, Hallejuliah, hallejuliah! Joseph was right, there is a God! I should go to sleep now…I should go to…sleep…..

*Kevin’s P.O.V*

I glanced at the paper that was in my hands, the front page was a picture of Lauren and Emily, the headline being, Are the Jonas girls ‘Burnin’ up’ for each other? And below that was a picture of them from our last concert, but it looked as though they were kissing.
I opened the door to my room, and walked in, seeing both Emily and Lauren asleep in my bed, Emily’s arm around Lauren. She was hugging her from behind protectively. I stood there watching Lauren breathe in and out deeply, her skin paler than normal, and she looked sickly thin, my mom must have been serious when she said Lauren’s been sick. I banged the door shut loudly in hopes that it would wake Emily up, luckily it did.
Emily sat upright in the bed, “It wasn’t me! I didn’t do it! Nobody saw me do it, you can’t prove anything!” She said quickly, then she fell backwards onto the pillows and began to snore loudly. I strode over and hit her over the head with the newspaper I had rolled into a tube, She jumped out of the bed, “Hi-yah!” She said striking a karate pose, then a look of recognition crossed her face, “Oh, Kevin.” She said bluntly, “Why’d you hit me?!” She screeched, whacking me across the shoulder, playfully.
“Why were you in bed with my girlfriend?” I asked, trying to sound calm.
“Because she’s been sick for the last forty something…fifty nine…hours and I haven’t had sleep in the majority of that time, and you woke me up.” She said angrily.
“Couldn’t you have called someone to look after her?” I asked.
She glared at me, “Well if you want to look after her, be my guest.” She said steadily, “Go practice being a daddy, you’re going to need it.” She said before she stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her, Lauren moved and puked into the bucket on her side of the bed, I wrinkled my nose at the smell, and then Lauren lay back down onto the pillows, breathing heavily and looking as though she was crying, then what Emily had just said sank in, It’s morning, she’s sick? Daddy? Oh, no, no, no. Oh crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap, crap……shit. I ran to get my cell phone out of my holdall, and went into the en suite closing the door, and dialling Joe’s number, there was a couple of rings, then a click, but no hello, so I just started talking anyway. “Okay Joe, get your ass to my room this instant, meet me in my en suite.”
There was no answer for a second, “ooooh, Kevin’s in trouble, Joe’s sleeping like a little angel and I just would never be able to bear waking him up, call Nick, maybe he’d give into your homosexual tendencies.” Then there was a beeping tone, Emily had hung up, “Damn you! It’s not like that.” I mumbled, even though she couldn’t hear me. I hit Nick’s number into my phone. There was another click, and some laughing in the backround, “Come back to this bed right now.” I heard Nick say.
“Come and get me.” Rachael hissed. “Hello, this is Nicholas Jerry Jonas’ secretary, he cannot come to the phone right now, as he is…dead!” Rachael said in a very high pitched posh voice.
I heard Nick laugh in the backround, then the phone disconnected. “Damn you two!” I hissed. Then I sighed, “last resort.” I whispered as I typed in my Dad’s number, there were two rings before his voice greeted me, “What’s wrong, Kevin?” He asked, sounding tired.
“I need you here, right now, now would be good, yes now would be good, good is now.” I mumbled nervously.
“Where are you?” He asked, sounding concerned.
“My en suite.” I said, my voice cracking.
I heard my Dad sigh, “Give me two minutes.” Then he hung up.
I slid down onto the floor, and put my head in my hands, and started to pray.
Dear God, I don’t know what she’s done to deserve this, if the press gets wind of this, they’ll slaughter her, and she’s already fragile enough, I know a child is a gift, but I don’t know what to do. Please help me, help her. I heard the door creak open, Thank you, Amen.
“What’s wrong?” My dad said, worried now.
I looked up at him, “Lauren’s ill…it’s the morning…we didn’t…but…Emily said ‘daddy’ and…I ….help me!” I said desperately looking up at him,
He sat beside me and put his arm around my shoulders, “Calm down, Kevin.” He said soothingly. “Now tell me the whole story.”
“Okay….” I mumbled, “I came in because you saw the papers and everything…and…and…Emily was asleep with Lauren…and I woke her, and she seemed angry….and we talked for a while…and then I asked her why didn’t she get somebody else to mind her for a bit, and she said…that I’m going to have to be a daddy anyway, and I freaked out…and if the press gets wind of this…” I looked up at him, his face showed no emotion. “They’ll slit her throat…and she’s not able for that…I’m not able for that…..please help me.” I finished in a whisper.
He stared at me for a minute, then sighed. “Kevin did you and Lauren…you know, I won’t be angry with you, after all it’s a fact of life.”
“No!” I shouted.
“Calm down.” He whispered, “You’ll wake her up.”
I stared up at him, “What do I do?”
“I don’t know…I’ve never been in this situation before. But what I suggest is that you go get into bed with your young…wife to be?” My dad suggested.
I sighed, “Thank you.” I said quietly, getting up.
“No problem, Now I’m going to go to bed, you should go and try and get some sleep. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He said standing up. “Night son.” He said patting my shoulder and walking out the door. I walked into my room, and saw Lauren sleeping, I got changed quickly and got into bed beside her, wrapping my arm gently around her waist.

~oOo~
I couldn’t sleep, I checked the clock, seven o’ clock, I checked Lauren, she was still soundly asleep, I got up slowly and walked down into the kitchen, flicking on the light, because the room was in darkness, and I walked further into the kitchen,
“Dude, turn off the light. There was a reason I had it off.” Emily said sitting at the table behind, she had her arm over her eyes and was wearing a t-shirt that I recognized as Joe’s from the night before, I jumped back nearly knocking over a chair, “Holy….I wasn’t expecting anyone to be here, or up yet.” I said, my heart racing in my chest.
“Light.” Emily growled.
I walked over and flicked off the switch and pulled up the blind, the sun was shining the grey light entered the kitchen, “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be up yet.” I mumbled, flicking the switch on the kettle, and taking out a mug.
“And I wasn’t expecting to see you in your underwear.” Emily answered back sarcastically.
“Touché” I mumbled, “Shouldn’t you be sleeping, you seemed pretty tired earlier.”
“Well yeah, But Joe snores like the hybrid mutated baby of a chainsaw and a foghorn, so here I am….Here…with you…at seven A.M, drinking coffee….with you…in your underwear.” She said, taking a sip of her coffee.
“You’re not much better.” I mumbled, filling up my mug.
“Stop perving on me, you have your own girlfriend upstairs in bed.” Emily said pulling down the t-shirt.
“Actually, wife to be..” I coughed, “Only I haven’t asked her yet.”
Emily looked confused, “Awww, you’re getting married? Congratulations, Dadio!”
I sighed, “That’s exactly why we’re getting married.”
“Huh?” Emily asked, confused.
“You know, I’m going to be a dad…” Woah, that sounds weird…
“Woah.” Emily said shocked, “The God fearing one got the girlfriend preggers!”
“You already knew that…” I mumbled confused.
“I did?” She asked.
“Yes, you told me.” I said seriously.
“…I did?” She repeated.
“So…you’re telling me that you told me Lauren was pregnant…but she’s not?”
“Ha, I did.”
I stared at her, “I hate you, so much.” I said smiling slightly. What a relief, although…marrying Lauren wouldn’t be so bad.
“Ooooh, Kevin Jonas said he hates me, he’s gonna go to hell.” Emily said playfully.
We both laughed as I sat down across from her, coffee mug in hand.