Oh. It's You

Okay, conclusion, Kevin’s here, I’m dead. Well…the room’s white and very bright, that part makes sense at least, the only thing that doesn’t is why the hell can’t I move, and why the hell am I in so much pain? Oh…there you go, maybe I’m IN hell. Then why would Kevin be here, and why would the room be bright, white and airy?
“Lauren? Are you okay?” Kevin asked, his face changing from shocked to worried.
“Am I dead?” I asked.
“No….why?” He asked, looking extremely confused.
“Because you’re here…?” I asked. What? It made sense, he did hate me when I was alive. Now that I’m dead, he seems to love me. I’m so definitely dead. What a great way to cross over, having the person you love the most be there and acting like I’ve just woken up from a coma or something…the only thing that’s bothering me is the pain and not being able to move, shouldn’t I be in a nice meadow?
“Lauren, you’re alive.” He said, his voice serious.
“Seriously, you should become a comedian.” I retorted.
“Lauren….you’re not dead, you’re in the hospital, you’ve just woken up from a coma.”
See, see, see! I am dead, because I did say he was acting like I just woke up from a coma, I am so dead. I wonder what kind of coffin I had….and where I was buried..
“I don’t believe that, you’re just trying not to scare me by saying ‘Yes, you died’ which won’t scare me, I quiet welcome the idea.”
Kevin just stared at me blankly, “Lauren. You. Are. Not. Dead.”
“SHE’S ALIVE!” Rachael shouted bursting through the door.
“No….I’m dead.” I said pretty sure of myself.
Rachael stared at me confused, “Then why am I dead? What did I do? Lauren, this is all your fault! Thanks a bunch.” She said turning around, and walked straight into the glass window, She fell to the floor and put her head in her hands, “Owww, who the fuck put that there?”
Nick seemed to appear out of no where, a worried look on his face, “I heard a bang, who died and where’s Rachael?” He asked quickly.
“Niiiiiccck, the window abused me.” Rachael complained still sitting on the floor.
I stared blankly at the wall in front of me. This is freakily alike to what always happened when I was alive….
Nick looked down at her, “Okay….that wasn’t what I was expecting to hear, but anyway-”
There was another loud bang, and all I could see was Joe’s face smushed against the glass, and him sliding down slowly to the ground on the other side of the window that Rachael had just walked into. Then he got up off the floor and walked smack into the window again.
“Niiiiiiccck, why won’t this door open?!” Joe shouted from the other side of the window.
“Because it’s a window.” Nick said calmly, “Do you usually open doors with your head?”
“That’d explain a lot.” Rachael mumbled under her breath.
Yeah, this is way too much like when I was alive…this is weird…maybe I’m alive? Nah…I can’t be.
Joe walked into the room, through the actual door this time. “My head hurts” He whined.
Yeah, nice to see you awake too.
“Join the club.” Rachael mumbled, still rubbing her head and sitting on the floor,
Joe joined her obediently on the floor.
“I think I need paracetamol” Rachael whined.
Nick pulled a packet out of his pocket, “Here you go.” He said handing her the packet.
She gave the packet to Joe, “I’ll have one after you do, if you don’t go high.”
Joe nodded slowly, and took one of the pills.
“Why does no one trust me?” Nick asked.
“Uh…because you drugged my wine and I ended up marrying you. Duh.” Rachael replied.
Way too like it was when I was alive…scary.
“Bal-a-mory! Bal-a-mory! What’s the story in Balamory wouldn’t you like to know? What’s the story in Balamory where would you like to go? Will there be treats with pockets and sweets, is that where we should go? Balamory! Or up to the castle inventing with Archie? He's ever so clever and ever so arty!
Whats the story in Balamory? Wouldn't you like to know? Choosing our colours and dabbing with paint; with Spencer we should go. Balamory! Or moving and jumping with Josie Jump? Would that be the story in Balamory? Whats the story in Balamory? Where would you like to go? Shall we have fun as we cycle with Plum? Is that where we should go? Balamory! Or taking it easy with Edie McCredie? Wouldn't you like to know? So... Whats the story in Balamory? Wouldnt you like to know? Whats the story in Balamory? Where would you like to go? Balamory! Balamory! Here is Miss Hoolie to tell us that story, but how does is all begin? Rainy, sunny, windy, or cloudy? Playing outside or in? Is today to stay at home to play? Going to school or Nursery? Whats the story in-”
“Joe?” Rachael sounding weirded out, “What the fuck are you on?”
Joe shrugged, “I dunno..” And was just about to go back to finishing the Balamory theme tune when Rachael whacked him over the head with her shoe to shut him up.
“Do not sing that fucking song here, I just escaped from it.” Rachael growled
Definitely like I was still alive. Weird..
“What is that song?” Kevin asked, looking utterly confused.
“It’s the Balamory song, and I have a better question, what is the street name for that stuff?! And how did you get it?!” Rachael asked Nick, pointing at the packet of ‘Paracetamol’.
“What the hell is Balamory?!” Kevin asked starting to get agitated.
“It is a toddlers program in Ireland and England, taped in England but whatever.” I said matter of factly.
Kevin nodded slowly, confused. Everyone else continued arguing, just like when I was alive, death is scarily like life. Freaky.
“That ‘Stuff’ does not have a street name, because it IS paracetamol, my question is, what the hell was Joe on before he took the tablets.” Nick answered.
Joe shrugged, “I wasn’t on anything. I just felt like singing that.” He said matter of factly, with a straight face.
Rachael stared at him like he was crazy, “Okay….and how the fuck do you even know that song? Balamory doesn’t exist over here, thankfully. Why the hell are you singing that?”
Joe shrugged, “When we were in England I ended up watching it. I liked it.”
I saw Kevin and Nick stare at Joe, as though he really was crazy. I couldn’t blame them.
“Seriously?” Rachael asked, “Seriously?”
Joe nodded slowly.
“Hey…wait, shouldn’t there be a doctor here with Lauren seeing as she just woke up from a coma?” Nick asked.
“Maybe because I died.” I said flatly.
Kevin gave me a worried look, then looked up at Nick, “I don’t know, but…uh..she’s convinced she’s dead.”
“I’m not convinced, I know I am dead.” I said matter of factly.
Joe stood up, “Creepy. I’m going.” He said turning around and smacking right into the window again, “Why is that even there?!” He asked through gritted teeth before he walked out of the door.
“Lauren, you’re not dead, did you not hear me say ‘SHE’S ALIVE! when I walked through the door?” Rachael asked.
“But…but I died…” I whispered, “Or I was meant too..”
I saw Kevin look away from us all, his face had a pained expression.
Rachael took the arm that was in a hell of a lot of pain into her hand, well I mean she took my hand, but I couldn’t feel it, she looked as though she was about to cry, “Lauren. You tried to kill yourself, they operated, you fell into a coma…and two weeks later against all odds, you’ve woken up. You’re not dead yet.” She whispered.
I tried to let that sink in, “Is that why everything is like when I was alive, and why I’m still in pain?” I asked.
Rachael nodded slowly, “We should go get a doctor.” She turned around to Nick, “Ick, go get a doctor. Now.” She said looking at him, he nodded slowly, and walked out of the room then turned back to me, smiling slightly.
I stared at her confused, “His name is Nick, not Ick..” I said quietly.
“I know that. I just choose to call him Ick. Makes more sense.” She said, smiling more as she spoke.
“Uh-huh.” I mumbled,
I saw Rachael glance at Kevin who was staring out the window absently, lost in thought, “What I say next may shock you, be prepared for a heart attack.” She said lightly, still looking at Kevin, who hadn’t noticed, “But Kevin, I’m worried about you.”
I stared at her confused. Where is our Rachael and what have the Martians done to her?
Kevin turned around, a mixture of shock and confusion on his face, “You’re worried about me?”
Rachael nodded, “Yes. You basically haven’t left the hospital in two weeks, when do you eat, when do you sleep? When do you have bathroom breaks? Whenever we come you’re always by her side.”
Now, I really think I am dead….am I?
“I do eat, I was asleep before Lauren woke up, and I do take bathroom breaks, sometimes Joe and Emily come in and look after her for a few hours while I go home. Happy?” He asked
She nodded slowly, “Still, I doubt it.”
He rolled his eyes.
The door opened, and instead of seeing a doctor, a girl a recognized instantly walked through the door, her redish, orange hair was still long and curly like I remembered, although she looked thinner than she had before, and her fashion sense had greatly improved, “Oh my God, Sarah.” I whispered, in shock, “I was so not expecting to see you here.”
She smiled slightly, her skin was still kind of pale, and her face covered in freckles, I found it somewhat hard to believe that she actually came here from Ireland, just to see me. I must be dead.
“You’re awake?” She asked confused.
“I guess I am.” I mumbled.
“I was told you were in a coma.” She said, still looking confused.
I saw Rachael and Kevin stare at her slightly confused, as if they didn’t know who she was.
“Well, she’s just woken up. I don’t mean to be rude, but who are you?” Kevin asked.
She held out her hand across the bed, and shook Kevin’s hand, “I’m Sarah, and I’m Lauren’s cousin. It’s nice to meet you.” She said lightly.
“How did you know I was sick?” I asked.
“I rang her!” Rachael said smiling.
Sarah nodded, “And yeah, here I am…”
“Wow, thank you for coming.”
She shrugged, “It’s okay.” Then she looked around, “Anyone know any hotel that I could stay?”
“You can stay in our house, my mom won’t mind, and we have a spare bedroom.” Kevin said quietly.
“Wow…Um, thank you.” Sarah said quietly.
“It’s the least I can do.” Kevin said quietly.
The door opened and a team of doctors came through the door, “I’m sorry, but would you please step out of the room?” The one in the middle asked, looking at Sarah and Rachael.
“Sure.” Rachael mumbled, grabbing Sarah’s arm and pushing her out of the room,
I saw Kevin take my hand, and I felt my stomach twist when I didn’t feel anything, like earlier.
The centre doctor smiled slightly, “Lauren, I’m doctor Martin, this is doctor Crow, and this is doctor Moore.”
“Nice to meet you.” I said, forcing myself to smile at the three of them.
Doctor Martin, looked like a middle-aged man, his hair was greying, and he had a few wrinkles, he was dressed in a shirt and tie and black trousers, with the typical Doctor’s coat, and a chart in his hands, Doctor Crow was a man that looked in his mid-thirties, not really as ugly as his name suggested, he was wearing what looked like a suit, with a doctor’s coat in place of the suit jacket, he kept glancing down at the charts Doctor Martin was holding, and then up at me, Doctor Moore was pretty, she had long hair, that fell just below her shoulders, and as she read through a separate chart in her hands, her glasses looked as though they may fall off her nose, she was thin, and looked as though she was in her twenties, and she wore heels with a knee length skirt and a shirt that was covered by her doctor’s jacket.
“You’ve certainly defied the odds.” Doctor Moore said, as she looked up at me, she didn’t smile, as she pushed her glasses up on her nose. “I’m a Psychiatrist, Doctor Martin is a surgeon, and Doctor Crow is a physiotherapist. In case you were wondering.” She said as she glanced at Kevin, then looked back at me, “How do you feel?” She asked.
“In pain.”
She nodded slowly, as she jotted something down.
“How’s the movement in your arm?” Doctor Crow asked.
I bit my lip, “I can’t move.” I whispered.
I saw the three of them glance at each other,
“At all?” He asked.
I shook my head, “Just my head, I can’t feel Kevin’s hand right now, either.” I said quietly, because I saw Kevin squeeze my hand, I just so badly wanted to feel that, and I saw a look of pain cross Kevin’s face.
Dr. Crow nodded slowly, “We need to talk, we’ll be back in a while. It’s good to see you awake again. But right now, we need to figure out how to help you.” He said as the three of them walked out the door.
I closed my eyes, trying not to cry.
Okay, Now I realize I just might be alive.
“Lauren?” Kevin’s voice sounded worried as he spoke.
I opened my eyes, “Yeah?” I was scared he might disappear, or decide he hated me again, so I really should savour him being here…
He moved from the chair he had been sitting in, to sit on the edge of my bed, so he was closer to me, he still had my hand in his, “I’m so sorry, this is all my fault.” He whispered, his eyes looked watery.
I stared at him confused, “What’s all your fault?” I asked.
I saw a scared look cross his face, “You don’t remember?” He whispered.
“I remember.” I said quietly, then I saw myself on the floor of the bathroom, and the blood running down my arm, and the knife in my hand, I tried to block the image out, but it wasn’t working too well. “I just don’t see why you have to be sorry.” I whispered.
“This is all my fault, I should have stuck by you, I made a vow. I made a vow to stay by you in sickness and in health, through better or through worse, and I broke that. I’m so sorry.” He whispered.
I shook my head, “It’s not your fault.”
“It is. I’m sorry I acted like I hated you, I’m sorry I ruined everything.” He whispered, “And I can understand if you hate me now. I treated you horribly, and I’m sorry it took something like this to make me see what I was doing. I could have lost you.” He whispered. “I almost did..”
“Kevin, I was stupid…and there’s no way I hate you. I love you, I’ve never stopped loving you. You just stopped loving me.” I whispered, my voice getting caught in my throat.
He put his hand on my cheek, and looked me in the eyes, “Lauren, I love you.” He said, his voice serious. “I may not have acted like it, but I do love you.”
“I love you too.” I whispered, I felt a warm tear roll down my cheek.
Kevin wiped the tear away gently, and he leaned in to kiss me, I kissed him back, and wanted to wrap my arms around him, but I couldn’t move either, I should have at least been able to move one.
The door banged open and shut again, Kevin jumped back in fright as Emily sat down in the chair by the bottom of my bed, “Well this is just brilliant.” She growled. Glaring at the newspaper in front of her.
“Nice to see you awake too.” I muttered.
Kevin was back sitting beside my bed in the chair he had been earlier, I could swear he looked embarrassed.
“Yeah, yeah, you need to read this.” She said, sounding stressed as she threw the newspaper at me, I just stared at her, “I can’t move.”
She rolled her eyes, “Sorry, sorry.” She mumbled as she placed it open on the front page, where the headline was, Let’s play a ‘Guess who?’ game. Jonas style.
Guess who’s pregnant, guess who’s had a miscarriage, and guess who’s in hospital.
“Oh crap.” I mumbled.
“Yes, I’m pretty fucked right now.” Emily said quietly.
There was a picture of Emily in what looked like the hospital’s waiting room, a side on view of her growing stomach. Then there was a picture of what looked like Rachael screaming at Nick in the waiting room, and then there was a picture of me from the last press conference.
I glanced down at the article.
Judging by these new pictures, you’ve probably guessed right. Yes, it is rumoured that Emily Corkish is pregnant, yes, Emily Corkish, notice anything about her name? Yes, she’s not a Jonas yet, but Joe’s gal looks radiant as she tries to hide it, good luck girl. It’s not going to work. Try to talk yourself out of this one Joe and Emily. Next is the miscarriage rumours, Rachael and Nick where seen arguing, loudly at that, in a hospital waiting room, seriously? Yell at each other in private, that way we wouldn’t know about this miscarriage, Rachael Jonas was quoted on shouting, ‘You blamed ME for miscarrying, you cannot say sorry for that.’ to Nick, we’re sorry to hear that it all went wrong, but hey, there’s always other chances. Then for last, Lauren is said to be in a critical condition in hospital, she was rushed into hospital about two weeks ago, and was said to be in a coma, we don’t know what’s wrong with her, but whatever it was must be serious. Also, we received a report from an insider that Lauren was never pregnant. Do you believe that or not?
“I was never pregnant.” I said through gritted teeth.
“I know, I know.” Emily said lightly.
Kevin stayed silent, but I remembered that Emily didn’t know…
“But hello? They know I’m pregnant, and Rachael will probably kill someone later. I’m thinking the red haired girl with her now, whoever she is.” Emily said.
“That red haired girl just so happens to be my cousin Sarah, whom Rachael managed to contact and she flew out here.” I said quietly.
“Oh.” Emily said quietly. “Then I’m sure she’ll kill Nick.”
“Or you.” I said lightly.
Emily glared back at me, “So funny.” She said sarcastically.
“I wasn’t trying to be funny” I said seriously.
She rolled her eyes, “I’m tired, I think I might go home.”
I stared at her confused, “Really?”
She nodded, “Yep, sorry, I’ll see you soon.” She said standing up and walking out the door.
“Ouch.” I mumbled.
Kevin sat back on my bed, “She’s hormonal.” He mumbled,
“That and because she’s pregnant she can do and act however she wants!”
The door opened and Rachael walked in, “Who thinks he or she can do what they want?” She asked, sitting in the chair that Kevin had been sitting in all day.
“Where’s Sarah?” Kevin asked.
“She’s having coffee with Nick.” She said lightly, “Now who were you talking about?”
“Emily.” Kevin answered.
Rachael rolled her eyes, “What did she do?”
“We were just saying that because she’s pregnant she thinks she can do anything she wants.” I said quietly.
“Agreed, but at least you don’t have to worry about stretch marks.” She said, smiling slightly.
Kevin stayed silent.
I stared at her, “Maybe one day I might have been glad to have to be in that position.”
She shook her head, “Lauren, you’ve always hated kids, you said you’d die if you ever had one.”
“You hated kids?” Kevin asked, a mixture of shock and …anger? In his voice.
I closed my eyes for a second, “I did, I never wanted kids, then when I met you, I changed my mind. I never had what you could call a loving childhood, so I never related well to kids, then I was told I couldn’t have kids, and then I realized how much I would have wanted a child in the future. As one saying goes, You don’t miss the water until the well has run dry.” I whispered, my voice cracking as I tried not to cry in front of them.
Rachael looked uncomfortable, “Urm…well I’ll leave you two alone for a little while, I’ll be back soon.” She said before walking out the door.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered to Kevin.
“Shh, it’s okay, I’m sorry too.” He said, brushing his hand across my cheek gently.
I closed my eyes, and sighed, when I heard the door open again, Kevin didn’t move from where he was sitting on my bed, but when I opened my eyes, he was staring at the doctors worriedly.
Their expressions were grim, and I started to get an uneasy feeling in my stomach, “What’s wrong?” I asked, trying not to show how scared I actually was.
“We need to operate again if you ever want to be able to move again.” Dr. Martin said, as he flicked through the charts in his hands.
“But..” Dr.Crow cut in, “The operation is to free trapped nerves, and to continue fixing the veins in your arm. Because we couldn’t get to some of them. But, with this, there’s a big risk.” He said quietly.
“What risks?” Kevin asked quietly.
“Well, if successful, you will regain movement, but if anything goes wrong, you could fall into a coma again, and this time you may not wake up. And if you do wake up, you might be paralysed.”
“How successful is this operation?” I asked.
“It holds a high success rate.” dr. Martin said truthfully.
“Could I die?” I asked.
“There’s a very slim chance of death.”
I bit my lip, and looked at Kevin, who was staring blankly at the ceiling. This was all my fault. “When can we do it?” I asked.
“Tomorrow morning.” Dr. Martin said.
I sighed, “Okay then.”
“Are you sure about this?” He asked.
“Positive. I want to be able to move.”
“Okay then, we’ll be back in the morning, early. I don’t mean to sound pessimistic, but if you need to say goodbye to anyone, do it tonight.” He said quietly, before they all walked out the door.
“You will make it through this, Lauren.” Kevin said quietly, looking at me.
“I hope so.” I whispered.
He smiled slightly, “You will.”

~oOo~

Kevin had gone to get something to eat, I think he was meeting up with Sarah as well and right now Nick and Rachael were in my room. I had my eyes closed, because I was tired, and I was half asleep, but every time I tried to sleep, I ended up seeing me take the knife to my arm, and the blood. So I had decided not to sleep, and just rest my eyes, but they thought I was asleep.
“So who is she exactly?” Nick’s asked Rachael, his voice low as if he was trying not to wake me. Even though I was awake.
“Sarah?” Rachael asked.
“Yeah?”
“She’s Lauren’s cousin.”
“Wow, I never guessed.” Nick said sarcastically.
“Well what do you want to know?” She hissed.
“Like, you know? How you found her, how you know her, and why is she the only one from Lauren’s family that flew out?” He asked.
“Well, I remember Lauren talking about her a lot, she used to go down to their aunt in Gorey during the summer, and they always kept in touch, so one day in Ireland, Sarah was staying with Lauren, and I got to meet her, and I thought she was nice. Terrible music taste, but nice.” She took a breath, “So I called her, and she said she’d just gotten her school holidays and would fly out, because she wanted to be there for Lauren. So she came. No one else came because I rang them and they didn’t care. But lets keep that to ourselves, she only thinks I rang Sarah.” Rachael said quietly.
I felt my stomach twist as she said that.
“How could they not care about her?” Nick asked quietly, his voice annoyed.
“Because, they’re idiots. We’re her family now.” Rachael whispered.
It was quiet for a minute, then Nick laughed lightly.
“Don’t laugh at me, it’s not funny. Give me your jumper.” Rachael hissed.
What the hell?
“Here.” He whispered.
“Thank you.” She muttered.
“No problem. But I don’t know how you’re cold.” Nick said, his tone was full of amusement.
“I think I’m getting a cold. You better stay away, wouldn’t want to make you sick, you might die.” She said, sarcasm evident in her voice.
“I could always help you warm up..”
Rachael was silent, but I heard the chair being dragged across the floor.
“I knew you’d say yes.” Nick said, laughing quietly.
“Neah.” Rachael mumbled, “I’m just doing this for warmth.”
I opened my eyes slowly, seeing her lean in to kiss Nick, “Do not have sex, because you will get pregnant and die.” I said lightly, quoting ‘Meangirls’ directed at Rachael.
Rachael jumped, and pushed Nick away from her, he ended up falling off his chair and hitting the ground.
“Shit Lauren, You scared me!” Rachael shouted, turning a deep red.
“Ouch.” Nick mumbled, “My head.”
If Emily was here, her question would be, ‘Which head?’ I laughed lightly at the thought.
Rachael stood up, “Okay…I think I’ve been embarrassed enough for one day, I think I’ll go home.”
“I’ll come with you.” Nick said lightly.
“Oh, before you leave I’ve been advised to say my goodbyes, be-”
“What? Why?” Rachael cut across me.
“Operation. Tomorrow morning. The doctor told me to day my goodbyes, just in case. So Nick, Take care of Rachael, and Rachael, don’t kill anyone. Love you both.” I said, smiling slightly.
“You’re not going to die, so I refuse to say goodbye to you.” Rachael said quietly.
Nick put his arm around her, “I’ll take care of her, and you will be okay.” Nick said quietly.
I smiled, “Thanks, and see you two.”
“Bye.” nick said softly.
“I’m still not saying goodbye. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Rachael said, before they walked out the door.
Sarah walked through the door almost as soon as Rachael left. “Hey.” She said quietly, as she sat down in the chair at the bottom of my bed.
“Hey.”
“Why did you do it?” She asked, her eyes flickered with something like anger, “Because really, I don’t see how living the life you live now could depress you enough to kill yourself. You’re married to a Jonas, you have friends. Was it for attention?” She asked, I noticed her fist curled up as though she would hit something or someone.
I felt as though I had been slapped across the face, “If I had have succeeded and died, why would I need attention?” I asked. “Why do you think I’d stoop that low?”
She shrugged, “I wouldn’t know, would I?”
“You should.” I whispered, feeling tears in my eyes.
“Should I?” She asked, “It’s not like anyone at home cares.”
A tear ran down my face, “I thought you came here to help me.”
“I did.”
“Well you’re not helping.”
“I just want to know.”
“Have you ever heard of such thing as depression?” I asked.
She laughed once without humour. “Yes. But why couldn’t you have went to some fancy councillor, you used to be happy, remember the summers in Gorey?” She asked.
“I remember.” I whispered. I was also pretending to be happy.
“Then why did you have to do that to yourself?”
“I don’t know..” I whispered, I knew damn well, but she never understood.
She sighed, and looked away, “I’m sorry.” She whispered. “I didn’t mean to say that…”
“I’m used to it.” I said bluntly. “I know you’re the only one that came, I know Rachael called the others.”
“It’s not that they don’t care…” She mumbled.
“Then why is it?” I asked, knowing it was because they didn’t care.
“Fine…I have no excuse.” She mumbled.
I sighed, “You don’t have to defend them.”
“I know.” She whispered.
“I have another operation in the morning, the doctors told me to say goodbye, in case.”
She stayed silent, and just stared at me worriedly, “You’re going to be okay.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” I took a breath, “But I want to thank you for coming, and if I don’t wake up. I’ll uh..see you? Sometime.”
“You will wake up, and I’m sorry, but I gotta go. Joe said he’d bring me back to the house, I’ll be in to see you tomorrow, bye Lauren.” She said as she walked out the door.
I closed my eyes, wishing for all the pain to go away, and I could feel myself falling to sleep.

~oOo~

I woke up with a fright, all I saw was me, in the bathroom, slumped on the floor, with the knife by my hand, and all that blood.
“Lauren?” Kevin asked softly, the clock said it was 2 A.M.
“It was a dream?” I asked, disorientated.
“What was?” He asked, he looked tired.
“Everything.”
“No..I’m sorry.” He whispered.
“Oh..” I whispered, as I yawned.
“You should go back to sleep.” He said quietly.
“No. I’m fine.” I said lightly, “You’re the one that should go to sleep.”
He shrugged.
“Seriously.”
“I’ll sleep tomorrow.”
I sighed, “You need sleep.”
He sat up on my bed, and smiled at me, as he brushed my hair out of my face. “I’d rather stay up with you.”
“And you can do that when I get out of here.”
He laughed lightly, “Lauren, I love you.”
“I love you too.”

~oOo~
*Kevin’s P.O.V*

“How is she?” I asked, as they rolled her back into her room.
“Critical.” The nurse answered, “But she survived the operation, and everything went as planned. Now it’s just the hardest part, seeing if she’ll wake up.”
“And she will?” I asked, my voice hopeful.
“Maybe, there’s a chance. But right now she’s hanging on.”
I nodded slowly, as I took my seat beside the bed.
“You look like you need sleep.” The nurse stated as she adjusted some wires that were attached to Lauren.
“I’ll probably just fall asleep, it’s no big deal.” I said, as I took Lauren’s hand.
She nodded slowly, “Still, I’d advise you to get some sleep, this must be a stressful time for you, what with this, and then all the rumours too.”
“Which rumours?” I asked.
“People are saying she’s had an ectopic pregnancy, and others are saying she still is pregnant.” The nurse said truthfully.
“Lauren was never pregnant.” I said truthfully, and I felt my stomach twist as I said that. She never would be either.
“I know. But rumours are vicious.”
“I know.”
“And Lauren’s fragile. You’d want to take care of her.” She said quietly.
“I know, I will, I’m trying my best.”
She smiled, “I probably should go, I’ll be back to check on her later.” She said as she walked out the door.
I kissed Lauren’s forehead lightly, then sat back down, taking her hand in the two of mine, “You will pull through this. I promise you.” I whispered, suddenly feel a wave of tiredness hit me.

~oOo~
*Lauren’s P.O.V*

I stood beside the bed, staring down at my body, and seeing Kevin asleep, and snoring in the chair beside the bed, Wait…why the fuck am I outside my body?! I’m not dead, I can’t be dead, nope, the monitors prove it, this is weird. But I can move, and there’s no pain. I just stood beside my bed for a minute, then I smiled slyly, I could have a bit of fun like this, however morbid that sounds.
I think I’ll go scare the life out of Joe, and Nick, maybe Rachael too, I’ll leave Emily out of this, she can just think that Joe’s crazy, Sarah’s probably still asleep from jetlag…
Now, how do I get out of here?