There's Just Too Much That Time Cannot Erase

"So how's the tour going so far?" Robbie asked as we all sat down.

"Really good, even better having Amy with us," Gerard said nodding with a smile.

"I'm sure it is, especially when we caught you two-"

Frank shut his mouth as soon as Gerard glared at him and everyone started cracking up, except for Robbie who just looked confused.

"What exactly?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"On the first night of the tour before our concert, the four of us busted into their room just to bug them and they were seconds away from kissing," Mikey said before catching Gerard's glare which was now directed at him. He jumped up and of course ran behind me for protection.

There were more laughs as Gerard mouthed 'I'll get you later' to Mikey and shook his head.

"So you two are like, together now?" Will asked.

"Umm..." I said looking at Gerard.

"Basically just taking it a step at a time I guess," Gerard said as he sat down next to me and Mikey darted to the other side of the room where Frank, Bob and Ray were.

"How's it been over here?" I asked. "Did you guys ever start that band?"

"No actually," Terry said smiling at the other three guys.

"Why not? You guys are awesome," I asked looking confused, not knowing what the four were plotting, without a doubt, Robbie was in on it too.

"That's one reason why we asked the guys to bring you over. We were hoping that when the tour's over we could start the band, with you as our lead singer," John said smiling.

I stared at them for a few seconds, I was in total shock.

"I'm just gonna go on a quick walk, be back soon," I said getting up, Layka following as I went upstairs and out the door, I really had to think about this. I put on Layka's leash and we walked through the woods to the lake where I always used to go when I lived here, it was my getaway you could say.

Gerard's P.O.V.

"Do you think we should've done better than just spring it on her?" Rocky asked after Amy had left with Layka.

"She seemed a little upset about it," Ray said. "Why's that?"

"She tell you guys about her old boyfriend?" Terry asked, mainly looking at me.

The five of us shook our heads, wondering how an old boyfriend had anything to do with this.

"One of my friends from highschool, Derek (not FFTL Derek, ya dorks), him and Amy used to go out. They got along really well, but then Derek just went...I don't know but he started drinking, drugs, cutting, all of that. It just made him really angry and most of it, he took out on Amy. Told her she was a horrible singer, no one loved her, that she'd never amount to anything. Eventually she just gave up singing, she only played piano," Robbie said sighing.

"That was after we had started talking about starting a band. Amy was really excited about it and everything, after the Derek thing, we just stopped asking her, it made her so depressed. We thought that her being on tour with you guys would help her get over him and that maybe she'd warm up to the idea, but guess not," Will said.

"I'll go talk to her," I said getting up.

"Check the lake behind the woods, that's where she always used to go to think about stuff," Carrie told me.

I nodded and went upstairs before stepping outside and walking towards the woods where Carrie had told me. After ducking a couple of old branches I saw Layka and Amy's tracks in the ground, arriving soon after at a lake, seeing Amy sitting on a bench, looking up at the sky. It was one of those times when I really wished I had my sketchbook.

I quietly walked over and sat next to her, noticing that she was silently crying. She turned her head and wiped away some of the black tears as she looked at me, she was more than upset about this.

"Come here Ames," I said softly as I wrapped my arms around her. I softly stroked her hair as she curled up next to me, her tears soaking my shirt as she continued to cry.

"What's wrong?" I asked her, hoping she'd answer.

"I can't do this Gee, I can't. I feel horrible about letting the guys down but I just can't," she sobbed, without even looking at me I could tell the tear flow had increased.

"Amy we talked about this earlier, I know you can, what makes you doubt yourself so much?" I asked, not even expecting how shocking her answer would be.

"My old boyfriend Derek. And I know Robbie already told you guys about him," she said looking up at me.

I nodded and she continued.

"All of a sudden he just changed, he started all of that shit and I was his way of getting out all of that anger. He'd yell at me, and I'd just blow it off, thinking he'd get over it. But one night I went over to his house...the door was opened and I just walked in...lying in a pool of his own blood, was Derek. He'd killed himself," she said, the tears pouring from her beautiful eyes. "And the note he left, it said that it was my fault that he killed himself, that I was worthless and I'd never do anything but hurt people."

Believe it or not, Amy had actually started crying even more, to the point where she was about to hyperventilate if she didn't calm down.

"Amy you can't believe that. It wasn't your fault, Derek screwed up and made you think it was. I don't know why he said the things he did but I'm sure it wasn't him talking," I said rocking her back and forth as she was now in my lap.

"How do you know?" she asked, the tears decreasing slightly.

"Because I almost did the same thing. I got really depressed, started drinking, cutting, got hooked on anti-depressants and was close to killing myself, the guys just snapped me out of it. They were there for me and eventually I got over it and got clean. Either Derek didn't have friends to help him through it or he just didn't want to tell anyone what was wrong, but you can't blame yourself for the path that he chose to take," I said looking into her eyes. "Amy, if you want to sing you should, I haven't heard you myself but you should never quit what you really love."

She gradually stopped crying and rested her head on my chest, looking out at the lake. I only hoped that I'd gotten through to her.