If Music Be The Food Of Love, Play On

Frank’s Point Of View

Our new apartment was more than perfect; it had lavish marble flooring, it was fully furnished with sparkling new tables and cupboards that looked as if they had been stolen straight out of Vogue, the architecture was astounding, and the general grandeur of it left Gerard and I aghast; that’s without even mentioning the sound proof music room!

Needless to say, Gerard devoted most of his days to sitting in there and… well, what he did I have no idea. Whenever I queried him about what he was up to, he would never answer me directly, so I just concluded that he enjoyed playing piano and left him to be.

I felt the weight on our bed change and some warmth leave my soul before a sleepy kiss was pasted onto my forehead. I kept my eyes closed contentedly, listening as Gerard’s soft footsteps padded away from the room. The music room door clicked open, then shut, and the apartment was left in deep silence again. I let my eyes droop as I drifted off into a tranquil slumber, littered with sweet dreams of reality.

-

I awoke what seemed like moments later and slid out of the bed lazily, my bare feet shuddering against the cool wooden floor. Yawning, I stumbled up the hallway, pausing at the music room door which was now open. I glanced inside, noticing Gerard perched on the stool at the piano grinning at me blissfully, as though he had been waiting for my awakening.

“Morning,” He smiled, beckoning me over.

I was too tired to say anything back; my eyes clouded over with sleep as I shuffled over to him and put my arms around him. I sat on his lap with my legs dangling nonchalantly either side of his warm, musical body. I slumped against him comfortably, nuzzling my head into the crook of his neck and inhaling his scent as he kissed my head once more.

“Good night,” I whispered back.

His hands threaded around my waist softly, curving against my hips and gently caressing the milky skin on the small of my back.

“Don’t go back to sleep,” He chuckled quietly, as he pressed his lips to my head lovingly.

I gazed at him questioningly, as he smiled and pecked my nose with those moist, strawberry lips.

“I’ve been doing some thinking and… well, first I want to show you something.” He glanced beside me nervously, deliberately avoiding eye contact. “Remember last week I said I’d prove how sorry I am for putting you through my grief, when you had your own?”

My eyebrows drew a line across my forehead, unsure as to where this conversation was leading.

“Mmm?”

He gently stood me up and turned to the piano, gracing his fingers delicately over the ivory keys.

“Is this what you’ve been doing for the past week?” I asked, realization kicking in.

He grinned and nodded, dragging his stool closer to the piano as he began pressing the keys. I draped my arms around his neck as he played the introduction and hushed the lyrics into my ears, as if they were for me, and only me.

His eyes danced along playfully, yet somewhat tenderly. His skin was like lustrous marble; silky and ashen, tautly swept over his angular cheek bones. His messy bronze hair highlighted his hazel orbs, which glimmered gracefully in the sun as he began singing.

Hand in mine, into your icy blues
And then I'd say to you we could take to the highway
With this trunk of ammunition too
I'd end my days with you in a hail of bullets

I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know just how much you mean to me
And after all the things we put each other through and

I would drive on to the end with you
A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full
And I feel like there's nothing left to do
But prove myself to you and we'll keep it running

But this time, I mean it
I'll let you know just how much you mean to me
As snow falls on desert sky
Until the end of everything
I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know how much you mean
As days fade, and nights grow
And we go cold

Until the end, until this pool of blood
Until this, I mean this, I mean this
Until the end of...

I'm trying, I'm trying
To let you know how much you mean
As days fade, and nights grow
And we go cold

But this time, we'll show them
We'll show them all how much we mean
As snow falls on desert sky
Until the end of every...

And as we're falling down, and in this pool of blood
And as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down
And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down
I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood
I'll meet your eyes, I mean this, forever

I was speechless; my vocal cords failed me as I tried to find suitable words to summarize every emotion surging through me. I gazed at the piano in reverence, and it occurred to me that over the last chapter of our lives he had been trying so hard to tell me what I meant to him, even after everything we had put each other through. My eyes glittered with fragile tears, explaining everything without the need for my speech.

“Sorry it’s a bit rough on the edges…” Gerard muttered, his expression laced with anxiety as he waited to see if I liked it or not.

“Gee, I… that was so perfect. I love you so much,” I announced, immediately clambering onto his lap once again.

“I love you too, Frankie, so much you could never understand.”

I drew our eyes together, painting them with love and passion until they dripped with so much amore it was almost unbearable. It was times like those that I loved so much; when we could gaze into each other’s eyes, our souls, until our breath hitched in our throat and our eyes glazed with stinging tears from the light dust that floated through the air and coated them. To share such intimacy with the person you love so much without the need to involve lust, it makes you whole; your heart complete and your love flawless.

Without quite knowing how, our lips found each other, as if they themselves couldn’t live without one another – after all they moulded together so well, like two lost puzzle pieces.

I kneaded my chapped lips against Gerard’s soft ones, desperately trying to fulfill my hunger for him as I slid my tongue gracefully along the length of his bottom lip and nibbled gently as he parted them eagerly. There was no battle for dominance, no fight for strength, just pure, genuine love and fervor.

I got lost in the moment as he laced his hand through my hair and pulled me in closer, deepening the kiss with such ardor that I struggled to keep myself from moaning. We indulged in each other, allowing our tongues to explore the interior of one another’s mouth as the musical beat of our hearts danced erratically in sync.

He gnawed playfully on my lip as he pulled away, earning a heartfelt whimper from me. He just giggled and pecked my nose, that lopsided grin of his plastered across his features.

He reached forwards and gently grabbed the tattered note book he had written the lyrics in, handing it to me cautiously.

“Open it,” he smiled reassuringly.

I obeyed and flicked through the pages, noticing how each side had the same precious handwriting graphitizing it. My fingers traced over the ink, before I breathed in the scent of both the book and my lover.

“They’re lyrics,” I stated, perplexed.

“Yes. I know.” He looked at me in complete admiration before continuing. “You love to play guitar, and I love to write and sing so… maybe we should play together,” Gerard grinned enthusiastically.

“That would be amazing!” I exclaimed, realizing that all traces of exhaustion had escaped my body. “We could get your brother to play bass too!”

He nodded, taking the book out of my hands and placing it on the floor next to us, before pressing his forehead against mine and affectionately rubbing our noses together in an Eskimo kiss. I caught his lips briefly, noting the soft shiver that whispered down his spine.

His eyes glazed over with something I hadn’t seen before; anticipation, apprehension, yet excitement. His hands rested on my waist and pushed me off him gently. He stood up gently, never letting me go. He placed me back down on the stool and smiled at me timidly.

Reaching into his back pocket, he tentatively pulled out a delicate silver box and lowered himself onto one knee. My eyes widened as I realized what was about to happen. My throat suffocated my breath, as my heart skipped like a malfunctioning CD. The blood rushed to my ears, inducing a deafening harmony of bells.

“Frankie, I know we’ve not been together for that long, but we’ve been through so much together in that time. I know I want to spend eternity with you. When you were in hospital for all that time, all I could do was regret all the things we never got to do. Life is short Frankie, and so what, I’m greedy; I want to spend every second of it with you. I don’t want to waste a moment. Every time I’m without you, I know I should be with you. I need you, my heart is yours. Without you it feels like I have a never ending abyss in my chest, desperately begging for you back. Being your boyfriend isn’t enough anymore baby, I want to make it official now, I want to be able to call you my husband.” He trailed off, glancing down at the small silver box before lifting the lid and relocking our gaze. “Frank Iero, will you marry me?”

Once again I was stunned into silence. All that could be heard was the unsteady thumping of my heart and the anxious heaving of Gerard’s chest. I didn’t fear that he would take my silence as a no, I’m pretty sure he knew I’d say yes, or he wouldn’t have told me all of that stuff. I looked upon my lover, my soon to be fiancé, who was crouched on one knee before my silent being. He looked beautiful, his face had inherited a gorgeous pink tinge and his black locks dropped delicately in front of his eyes like a sculpture from a museum… my sculpture.

I reached for his hand and pressed it against my cheek whilst sweet tears formed in my eyes again. I sieved through my mind to choose my reply; the words had to be as perfect as Gerard.

“Yes! Yes, of course I will Gee-max,” I beamed, his youthful emerald eyes glowing as my answer registered in his mind.

He grinned widely and opened the petite box once more. He took my left hand into his and slipped the ring onto my finger. It was just a plain gold band, but I loved it. It told it like it was: plain and simple; we loved each other.

As soon as the eternity ring was perpetually glued to my finger, Gerard stood up, his face radiating ecstasy.

I ardently jumped onto his waist as he twirled me around in a frenzy of affection, us clinging together like we would never see each other again, although that was now far from the truth.

Life was so perfect right then.

“Ti amo.”