1000 Stars Are Passing By

Dear Bill,

You always told me from the beginning that our life would be hard. Sure, I got over that. I knew you would help me get used to this life of fame and fortune. It’s been rough.

Maybe we were young and naïve... I’ve been thinking about this for awhile. We had kids too young, got married to young. I was young and unafraid of anything when I married you. I was too unafraid to think of the children, our children.

I’ve grown up and seen what’s become of famous people’s kids. Rich, snotty, do whatever they want, get whatever they want. I know both of us don’t want that for our children.

Now that they’re older and the twins are about to turn four I’ve been thinking even more. Sophie is always offered photography shoots, acting spots in movies. She’s four for God’s sakes. Kayden is slowly getting offers as well. Especially for his sake, I don’t want that. You know how Kayden is. We all know he’s going to have a rough time growing up; it’s just the way it’s planned to be. And I can see Sophie as a teen, probably singing in some rock band, smoking pot because it’s cool. Maybe heroine is cooler in the future, I don’t know. Will is under the watchful eye of Sophie. He’ll be pushed around by her, I know it.

This is not something I’m blaming you for. I’m not blaming anyone for how our kids will turn out to be but Bill, you know I’m right. I’m not saying I don’t love you. I love you more than anything in the world and I will never stop loving you.

So I hope you understand when you read this that I’m gone. I’m taking Kayden with me. Don’t try and track me down or call me, its better this way. If I were that headstrong I would take them all with me, but I think if they grow up separately, there might be a better chance that their set futures may turn out for the better.

Love,
Tara

I had laid that letter on his bedside table already, but I was still in bed with him. It was around three in the morning and he was asleep of course. I just wanted his warmth around me forever, but I had to go soon.

I felt my phone vibrate beside me. Gustav had texted me saying everything was packed and my cab was ready to go.

I crawled out of bed and threw on some clothes.

Standing beside our bed I watched him sleep. He always looked so gorgeous when he slept. His shirt off, I could see the toned muscle, the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed. His lips were in a pout.

I leaned over and kissed him for the last time, ran my hands through his silky dark hair, and left.

I went into the twin’s room and grabbed Kayden into my arms, who woke for a moment but didn’t cry and then fell back to sleep. I kissed both Sophie and Will as a tear rolled down my cheek.

The window in their room gave such a beautiful view of the city below, the cars rolling by downtown, people making an early commute for the morning shift....

I’d left my resignation at work that day as well. God knew I’d miss it. Fashion designing is what kept me sane.

But it wasn’t as if I wouldn’t have money to support me. I’d taken out money from our bank account and all of my money from my own success.

As Gustav said, the limo was waiting for us. All of my things and all of Kayden’s things were packed in suitcases and ready to go.

I placed Kayden in his seat and turned back to Gustav, who stood at the side of the car with a glum look on his face.

I turned to him and embraced him tightly.

“Will you ever come back?” he asked, choked up with tears. He had always loved me, you know.

“Gussi...I don’t think so,” I replied and looked up at him as he held me still. A few tears poured down his cheeks and I wiped them away. “But you can call me anytime you want. And come and visit, please, just try and disguise yourself. I want some lasting memory of my life, alright?”

He nodded. “Call me when you get there.”

“I will,” I answered. “Get home to Gianna. Tell her I’ll miss her.”

He nodded again and without another word he hailed a taxi and left.

I climbed into the limo and closed the door.

I crawled up into a ball in the backseat and as we began to drive away I started to ball my eyes out.

Every good decision has a consequence, right?

Maybe I was wrong...

I watched Kayden sleeping in his seat. He looked exactly like his father when he slept, but he had dirty blonde hair instead.

I smiled through my tears.

I’d do it for my kids.