I Need Something More.

NO P.O.V:

“I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

Those were the last words she spoke to Alex. Typically they’re parting words were, I love you or go to sleep, you have to wake up early followed by a string of sweetly strung words before finally separating. It’s been almost two weeks, twelve days if one wants to be exact, since that night. Since she walked out on Alex, Hannah and the rest of the boys.

Alex tried to call, message, send flowers, anything really to get her to talk to him. But she wouldn’t- she couldn’t. She just kept avoiding him. Sophia wasn’t mad at him, in all honesty she didn’t really understand what he was apologizing for.

No, the reason Sophia was avoiding Alex was because she was afraid. Afraid of him hurting her again. In her drunken state she laid out all her cards. Sophia had let down every defense and acted on the impulse of her feelings- Sophia gave him affection, she let him know she wanted him, but he turned it down, turned her down. Alex told her it was a mistake, that it shouldn’t have happened. Alex didn’t understand that those words were equivalent to slapping Sophia's feelings back in her face, telling her they were not returned. And as much as it broke her heart to be away from him, she couldn’t bare to be around him anymore, it just hurt too much.

Sophia rolled onto her back, still in bed, groaning at the conclusion she came up with every morning- everyday actually. As much as Sophia had been avoiding Alex, she couldn’t bring herself to love him any less.

“I am pathetic.” Sophia moaned finally dragging herself out of bed. Noting the absence of Alex’s scent on her sheets.

Lazily, she stalked down the stairs stretching with each step trying to crack the sleeping bones. Sophia followed her morning routine to the t, just an hour later than usual- for this morning all studio sessions were cleared due to a late morning meeting.

Everything was followed en suite as it has always been. She checked to make sure everything was off when her home phone begun to sound off. Sophia rushed downstairs as fast as her high heeled feet would carry her safely. Before Sophia had a chance to check the caller ID, the ringing cut off; sending the caller to voice mail. As the message was being recorded she listened intently- incase it was important.

“Hey Soph,” Alex’s voice echoed through out her condo instantly capturing her attention.

“You’re probably screening my call but it was worth a shot- oh wait no. You’re at work.” He rambled. “Listen, I know you don’t want to talk to me, but I umm, this time I’m not calling for myself. Hannah’s here and she’s been wondering where you’ve been.”

At the mere mention of Hannah, Sophia’s heart sank into her chest. One she stopped answering Alex’s calls, she intern stopped answering hers too- thinking it was him.

“I don’t know exactly what to tell her but umm, even though you’re mad at me please don’t ignore Hannah. She adores you, it would break her heart. So whenever you get the chance, just call- you can text first telling me to pass the phone straight to Hannah if you want, but just... just call.”

Sophia slouched over the machine debating on picking up- to tell him this entire thing was stupid and she was sorry, but she couldn’t. Her heart hurt too much.

“Well, I guess that’s it. I- umm, I’m sorry love, I really am.” He finished leaving Sophia feeling the same Alex felt when she left him; like shit.

Throughout the entire day Sophia was plagued with the sound of Alex’s voice echoing in her head. On any other occasion she would have been content with his voice replaying in her mind but considering the current circumstance, she would rather it not. It wasn’t so much his voice that kept the constant frown on her face throughout the day, but the words he spoke. Sophia knew he was right, that it would devastate little Hannah if she didn’t call- or at least make some form of contact with the child- so all day Sophia prepared herself. Tonight, she was going to call Alex. It needed to be done; for Hannah’s sake. Sophia was ready to suck it up, to take the heartbreak of hearing Alex’s voice again because her love for Hannah meant more to Sophia than her own heart.

After work Sophia staggered home. She wasn’t irritated as any normal person would when stuck in LA traffic but waited patiently- thankful for each minute she was trapped there for when she arrived home, she promised herself she’d call Alex. Upon arriving in her seemingly spacious home, Sophia kicked off her heels, dropping all her belongings on the grey marble counter and pulled out her phone. She fell onto the plush peach coloured sofa. Her fingers began scrolling through her contact list until spotting a familiar name. Gaskarth, Alex it read. Sophia stomach started turning at the sight of his name, to say she was nervous would be quite the understatement.

As she mentally prepared herself to press the talk button, her heart pulsed violently against her chest. With each beat a new thought hindered her motions. Each thought brimming with new fears towards Alex’s reactions. Sophia’s heart continued to pulse as the mustered all her courage to press the button.

Ring.

This is a mistake, she thought.

Ring.

Bad idea, bad idea. She continued to worry.

Ring.

I am such a loser.

Ring.

I should just hang up--

“Hello.” A voice broke through sounding frazzled. “Hello?”

“...Sophia?” The familiar voice questioned.

“Oh, umm. Hi.” Sophia answered feeling like a complete idiot. “Alex?”

“Sophia,” Alex’s voice smiled through the phone.

Alex didn’t waste Sophia’s time, knowing the main reason she’d call was to speak to Hannah, not him. Though he was happy just hearing her say his name once again- hearing her say anything really. With a few short words Alex called over Hannah and let the eager little girl speak to Sophia. Alex hadn’t seen Hannah’s smile any brighter in the past few weeks, than the one she was wearing as she spoke on the phone. He eavesdropped on his daughters conversation trying to soak in as much of Sophia’s voice as he could. Before he knew it, he was agreeing to let Hannah sleepover at Sophia’s and visiting later to drop her off.

Hours after Hannah conned Alex into agreeing to let her stay with Sophia, Alex had her ready and packed. He held Hannah in his arms as he stood on Sophia’s doorstep. He felt a strong sense of discomfort as he stood there, like he was out of place. Alex felt his heart beat loudly in his chest as he waited. A few weeks ago, such a sensation never existed when it came to Sophia, but now it was different. Everything had changed.