My Way Home Is Through You
Chapter 6.
Chapter 6. – Danny’s Pov
“Hey Dougs.” I smiled as I sat down next to him in the living room.
“Hey…” he mumbled.
“How are you today?”
“As always.”
I cocked my head to the side as I watched him. He didn’t look the same as he used to. Not that happy as he always did. Something was wrong and I could feel it.
I moved closer and placed an arm around his neck, and automatically he rested his head against my chest.
“Doug… I don’t think it is very good if you spend time with Mikey. He might be some murderer or something. And I don’t want anything to happen to you. I’m not making any decision. I just want what’s best for you.” I said quietly, just waiting for him to freak out.
“I kind of love him. He’s really nice, Danny. He wouldn’t want to hurt me. He would never do anything bad. He’s had a hard life, Dan. Why would he want to mess mine up?”
I bit my lower lip, trying to think of what to say. Maybe Mikey really wouldn’t hurt him? It might have been my brain that was messing with me, trying to make me believe all things that I had been thinking of. All those bad things I thought about Mikey.
“But what if someone else likes you?” I tried.
“I know you love me Danny. But I don’t know if I’m ready for you yet. Please just let me like Mikey. He won’t do anything against me. He won’t hurt me.”
“What do you mean with that? That you’re not ready for me yet?” my heart broke into a thousand pieces. My love was so strong for him that even a sentence like that hurt. But if he would go and fall even more in love with Mikey, would hurt even more. It seemed like there wasn’t anything I could do to stop him.
“I just can’t have a relationship with you yet. Besides, not to hurt you or anything, but I’m not sure if my love for you is as strong as your is for me. Danny, you’re my band mate. Even if the band is on a break, you still are. Can’t I just get some time to think about it all?”
“Sure… Take your time…” I mumbled, before standing up from the sofa, feeling the hurt tears starting to sting in the corner of my eyes. I didn’t want to cry over a thing like that, but I just couldn’t stop the tears. Quickly I ran out of the room and into the bathroom, Dougie’s voice still echoing around in my head.
He wasn’t ready…
I sat down on the cold floor, my back resting against the wall as I let my head fall back.
I needed some time alone. And if I was lucky, the whole day would go quickly without me noticing it. I could forget to watch the clock, and sit in the bathroom all day.
“Danny… Dougie told me that you were in here… Are you okay?” Harry’s voice came through the door.
”I’m fine…” I said so that he could hear.
“Then come out instead of sitting alone in the bathroom. We can talk? Because I know there’s something wrong Danny. You never lock yourself in the bathroom.”
Slowly I reached my hand up to the lock and un-locked the door, just waiting for Harry to open the door. Which he did only seconds later.
He cocked his head to the side as he stood and watched me.
“Something really is wrong.” He said as he sat down next to me, placing a hand on my arm. “What’s is wrong, Danny?”
“It’s…Dougie… But it’s all complicated… You won’t understand it…” he mumbled, wiping away a tear that was on its way down my cheek.
“Try me.”
I sighed before I started. “I’m in love with Dougie. And don’t laugh at me because I’m gay. And…Mikey is stopping me from getting together with Dougie. Even if Dougie says he’s not ready for me. But I know that he says that because he wants Mikey instead. I’ve been thinking like mad about Mikey. All my theories might be right about him. But I’m not sure. I mean, he might be some murderer or some rapist. Who knows if he kills or rapes Dougie when he has got together with him?”
“Oh Dan… Don’t think I would laugh at you because of you being gay. I’m gay too…”
”You are?”
”Yes I am. And don’t worry about the whole Dougie and Mikey thing. It’ll be okay in the end. And…is it because of all this, that you have tied Mikey to your bed?” he screw his face up and watched me, how I blushed madly. How did he know? I never told anyone about it.
<3
“Hey Dougs.” I smiled as I sat down next to him in the living room.
“Hey…” he mumbled.
“How are you today?”
“As always.”
I cocked my head to the side as I watched him. He didn’t look the same as he used to. Not that happy as he always did. Something was wrong and I could feel it.
I moved closer and placed an arm around his neck, and automatically he rested his head against my chest.
“Doug… I don’t think it is very good if you spend time with Mikey. He might be some murderer or something. And I don’t want anything to happen to you. I’m not making any decision. I just want what’s best for you.” I said quietly, just waiting for him to freak out.
“I kind of love him. He’s really nice, Danny. He wouldn’t want to hurt me. He would never do anything bad. He’s had a hard life, Dan. Why would he want to mess mine up?”
I bit my lower lip, trying to think of what to say. Maybe Mikey really wouldn’t hurt him? It might have been my brain that was messing with me, trying to make me believe all things that I had been thinking of. All those bad things I thought about Mikey.
“But what if someone else likes you?” I tried.
“I know you love me Danny. But I don’t know if I’m ready for you yet. Please just let me like Mikey. He won’t do anything against me. He won’t hurt me.”
“What do you mean with that? That you’re not ready for me yet?” my heart broke into a thousand pieces. My love was so strong for him that even a sentence like that hurt. But if he would go and fall even more in love with Mikey, would hurt even more. It seemed like there wasn’t anything I could do to stop him.
“I just can’t have a relationship with you yet. Besides, not to hurt you or anything, but I’m not sure if my love for you is as strong as your is for me. Danny, you’re my band mate. Even if the band is on a break, you still are. Can’t I just get some time to think about it all?”
“Sure… Take your time…” I mumbled, before standing up from the sofa, feeling the hurt tears starting to sting in the corner of my eyes. I didn’t want to cry over a thing like that, but I just couldn’t stop the tears. Quickly I ran out of the room and into the bathroom, Dougie’s voice still echoing around in my head.
He wasn’t ready…
I sat down on the cold floor, my back resting against the wall as I let my head fall back.
I needed some time alone. And if I was lucky, the whole day would go quickly without me noticing it. I could forget to watch the clock, and sit in the bathroom all day.
“Danny… Dougie told me that you were in here… Are you okay?” Harry’s voice came through the door.
”I’m fine…” I said so that he could hear.
“Then come out instead of sitting alone in the bathroom. We can talk? Because I know there’s something wrong Danny. You never lock yourself in the bathroom.”
Slowly I reached my hand up to the lock and un-locked the door, just waiting for Harry to open the door. Which he did only seconds later.
He cocked his head to the side as he stood and watched me.
“Something really is wrong.” He said as he sat down next to me, placing a hand on my arm. “What’s is wrong, Danny?”
“It’s…Dougie… But it’s all complicated… You won’t understand it…” he mumbled, wiping away a tear that was on its way down my cheek.
“Try me.”
I sighed before I started. “I’m in love with Dougie. And don’t laugh at me because I’m gay. And…Mikey is stopping me from getting together with Dougie. Even if Dougie says he’s not ready for me. But I know that he says that because he wants Mikey instead. I’ve been thinking like mad about Mikey. All my theories might be right about him. But I’m not sure. I mean, he might be some murderer or some rapist. Who knows if he kills or rapes Dougie when he has got together with him?”
“Oh Dan… Don’t think I would laugh at you because of you being gay. I’m gay too…”
”You are?”
”Yes I am. And don’t worry about the whole Dougie and Mikey thing. It’ll be okay in the end. And…is it because of all this, that you have tied Mikey to your bed?” he screw his face up and watched me, how I blushed madly. How did he know? I never told anyone about it.
<3