Do You Love Me?

Pushing Garbo away from myself I immediately took a step backwards. What did just happen? I began to ask myself repeatedly, but then my questions were answered automatically as the memory came flushing back into my mind. My eyes were now stinging with tears, I couldn’t believe what he had just did to me. How dare he even think of me in such away?! I cried in my mind whilst thinking of a way to confront this selfish creature before.

“Jai,” he began, “I can explain,”

“Just don’t okay?” I interrupted him, “your actions have already spoken for you Gregory.” I replied back bitterly. “It has not even been two days since the love of my life has passed away and all of a sudden you decide to make a move on me?! That is truly disgusting! You are hideous!” I screamed in his face as the tears from my sore eyes began to fall all over again.

“I love you.” He confessed to me for the first time ever.

“And I hate you,” I answered him. “How can I ever even think about loving someone who has always wanted Drew out of my life? Someone who dares to think he can replace him?!” I kept on yelling, “how can you love me when your heart is made out of stone?” I raised an eyebrow at him, “you cannot, and no human being who has the power to love someone would do such a rude and horrible thing, Gregory. You cannot love me.” I said turning away from him.

I felt him take a few steps forwards, “But I do love you Jai. I fell in love with you since the very first time I laid my eyes upon you. You fascinated me, I have always felt attracted towards you and now that…that Drew is gone, I thought it would be best if the truth were now out in the open…” he tried to explain. “You cannot help who you fall in love with and I think that you know that fact very well.”

I slumped myself down onto the sofa and let out a huge sigh, “I have always seen you as a friend Greg…” I sniffed, “a really good friend, nothing more.” I told him how I felt, “no one can replace my Drew, and I can’t believe that the thought even crossed your mind…” I said resting my head on the arm of the sofa.

“I’m sorry…” he apologised. “I can’t help how I feel.”

“I know.” I got up from where I was sat, “nobody can.”

“Do you forgive me?” he asked me after a long awkward pause.

I looked back at, at his face and thought to myself – could I really be able to get myself to forgive him? After what he said and did? It seemed highly unlikely for me to forgive and forget the pass few events that had now taken place, “when I look at you now…I feel sick.” I calmly began to explain myself, “you wanted Drew to be separated from me. You might not have said the exact words but I bet you thought about it,” I saw him lower his gaze in shame, “how shall I put this…you are like a murderer right?”

He looked at me really confused.

“Well to me you are,” I said after a few seconds of pause, “when I look at you…I want to slap you. I feel like I have betrayed my Drew in someway, I know for a fact that none of this is my fault. But I feel responsible. I hate this feeling, Greg. I really do.”

Gregory took another stepped towards me but I instantly started to back away before he could touch me again, “that can change,” he said, “sooner or later you will forgive and forget. You will move on, I know.”

“What if I don’t want to move on?” I questioned.

He stood patiently staring right into my eyes for a moment; I didn’t want our friendship to ever be damaged, I cared about him a lot, I really did. But, after everything that occurred I could not simply forget about and move on from here, I don’t think anybody could if they were stuck in the same position as me.

He cleared his throat, “then I’ll wait.” He answered rather confidently, “so when you do finally move on…I’ll be there.” He whispered in my face.

I took my eyes of off his face, “I really do not believe you.” I told him, “If you stay here any moment longer, I might say something I will probably regret later on. So please for your own benefit. Leave. And don’t come back.” I ordered him, without looking at him at all.

“Nothing will change how I feel about you, Jai.” He alleged and stepped into the hallway of the house, “I know you will move on Jai. I believe in you,” he said and with that he walked out of the house leaving me rather horribly speechless.

I sat down upon the hard rickety wooden chair for what seemed like a bit more than an hour just thinking about what had happened between Gregory and me. I even started to refer to him with his full name – that made me laugh a little. This situation that I was somehow trapped in wasn’t even funny. I didn’t want to end my friendship with Gregory but I was left with no choice whatsoever.

The front door eventually clicked open and in walked my little brother, Nicholas. “Where is everybody else?” I asked him as soon as I realised that he was all on his own.

“They went to a nearby grocery store to pick up a few things,” he informed me and sat down on the chair opposite me, “did Garbo…come here?” he asked.

My mouth fell open, “why’d you ask?”

“Because I sort of…sent him here…Jai he really likes you! And I think you would both be good together!” he said all of this in one breath.

I stood up, “excuse me?!” I began to yell again. “I don’t care if he likes me Nick! He kissed me! And I do not appreciate it, understood? It is none of your business in the first place so keep your butt out of it!” I screamed wiping the sweat off my forehead.

“You know, he will wait for you. He has never liked any other girl as much as he likes you. No matter how long it takes you to say yes he will wait.” Nick made his point and left the room.

I buried my face in my hands and let out a loud shriek, I felt so much anger forming inside of me. I could not even get myself to think about moving on and forgetting about Drew. What I shared with him was very special, something that was unforgettable. Drew was my everything and without him here with me, I felt incomplete.