Stay Still

Mike came over around eight and instead of walking to Matt’s house first, I kept going.

“Where are you going?” Mike asked, looking confused.

“I’m not walking with Matt today. If you want to you can but I’m going straight to Eric’s.” I replied and then kept walking. Mike stood there indecisively for a few minutes and then followed me.

“Why aren’t you walking with Matt?” Mike asked.

“Because we’re having a fight and I don’t want to be around him at the moment.” I told him. We were at Eric’s house now. The front door was open and Matt and Eric were standing right inside the door, yelling at each other. I grabbed Mike’s arm and dragged him behind the bush next to the open door.

“What are we doing?” he whispered.

“Shh.” I whispered back, trying to hear what Matt and Eric were saying.

“How could you have slept with her?!” Matt yelled.

“I could say the same to you!” Eric yelled back.

“What do you mean?”

“You knew how I felt about her but you not only slept with her, you got her pregnant!!”

“Well it sure didn’t seem like you felt anything for her when you were sleeping around with any slut you could find.”

“Whoa…” Mike whispered. I nodded in agreement. “You slept with Eric?” he asked. I nodded again and then told him to shut up so I could hear. What I heard was punches being landed and the two of them cursing at each other. “Holy crap, they’re beating each other up!” Mike almost yelled.

“No, really? I thought they were having a tea party.” I said and then stood up to go break up their fight. The two of them came flying out the door, still pounding on each other. “Hey! Guys!” I yelled. They apparently didn’t hear me.

“Forget this.” Mike said and then grabbed them both by the hair and yanked them apart.

“Ow! Let go!” They yelled.

“Not until you promise to stop.” Mike said.

“OK, fine. We promise.” Matt said.

“Yeah, please, just make him let go!” Eric said.

“Mike, let them go.” I told him.

“Oh fine, if I have to.” He let them go but stayed in between them just in case. “Could someone please explain to me what the heck has been going on for the past two days because I seem to be missing a lot.” Mike said. Matt and Eric both started talking at the same time. “Stop! Rachel, you tell me.” he said looking at me.

“Tell you what? You already know everything. I’m pregnant, it’s Matt’s, we’re giving it to Jared and Acacia, Eric and I slept together last night and those two just beat each other up. What else is there to tell you?” I asked.

“How bout why did they beat each other up? They’re supposed to be friends.” he pointed out.

I shrugged. “You’ll have to ask them that.”

He turned and looked at them expectantly. “Well?”

“I don’t know. I…” Matt stopped. I could tell he felt horrible about what happened but he was also hurt, and not just physically.

“You know what, it’s getting late. We need to get to school.” I said.

“Yeah you’re right. Eric, walk with me. These two need to talk.” Mike said, grabbing Eric’s arm and pulling him down the sidewalk. Matt stood there looking at the ground for a few minutes and then walked away. I ran after him.

“Matt wait!” I called. He stopped but didn’t turn around. “Matt, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you.” I whispered.

“It doesn’t matter. Just forget…”

“It does matter.” I interrupted him, “It matters a lot. I hurt you and I don’t know how to fix it.”

He turned around and looked at me. “Rachel I know you love him. And I know that he loves you. You two mean the world to me, I just want you both to be happy.”

I thought about this for a minute. “What about you Matt? What would make you happy?” I asked.

Now it was his turn to think. We started walking towards school while I waited for his answer. Finally he said, “Honestly? I have no idea. I look at you and I feel like you’re the only person in the world who could ever make me truly happy but then I remember that you don’t feel the same…”

“Aw Matt. I’m so sorry. I wish I could change how I feel about you. You’re my best friend, you’ve always been there for me whenever I needed you and now I feel like I can’t be there for you when you need me. I don’t know what to do.” I sighed at the impossibility of the situation.

Matt stopped walking again and hugged me tight. “Listen, don’t worry about me okay? I’ll be fine. All you need to worry about is yourself and that little one inside you.” he whispered.

I sniffed, “but…”

“No buts. This is the end of this conversation.” he said more forcefully as he released me.

“Alright fine.” I agreed and started walking again.

“Race ya.” Matt grinned over at me.

Grinning back, I took off running.