Excuse The Obscene

Toni’s P.O.V.

Step, step, step, wall. Step, step, step, wall.

I’ve never claimed to be a patient person and whatever little patience I used to have slipped away hours ago when the pacing started. The little, cement cell didn’t leave much room to spread out and forced me to make my steps shorter and shorter before I stopped pacing all together.

After all the deals I’ve pulled, and all the men I’ve killed, luck would have it that I end up in jail simply for jumping in a car with Johnny.

The thought had me up and pacing again. I could only imagine how Zacky had reacted and how angry he’d be with me. And suddenly, jail didn’t seem so bad. The longer I spent in here, the more time Zacky had to mull the situation over and calm down.

I threw my head back and slid down to the floor. My ass had barely touched the dirty cement floor before the sound of the cell opening had me climbing back to my feet. The officer that had opened the cell motioned for me to hold my arms out. Rolling my eyes, I held my wrists out and allowed myself to be cuffed.

I followed beside him, my walk far more relaxed and carefree than I actually felt. Moments later I was sitting in the same room I found myself in yesterday. I’d been in there for less than a minute when Cherie, the lawyer I’d met the day before, walked in and took a seat across from me. Without so much as looking over her shoulder, she spoke quickly to the officer.

“I’d like a moment alone with my client.”

Seconds later the door shut and Cherie leaned back in her seat.

“So when can I get out of here?” I asked before she could open her mouth to speak.

“We’ll find out soon enough but I’m betting my job that you walk out of here today. And my life.” She muttered the last part more to herself than to me.

Yesterday she’d been nothing but cool, confident and calm so the sudden lack of faith set a little inkling of panic in me. I took a deep breath before reminding myself of everything that had happened yesterday.

“You said it yourself – they have no solid case against me. I should probably be more worried about how Zacky’s going to react when I get out.”

“They might not have a case against you yet, but they do have you locked up and if we don’t get you out soon they’ll have plenty of time to find something to charge you with. Something tells me you don’t have a squeaky clean background.”

Before I could respond, the door flew open and the same sullen cop from yesterday stormed in. Arms crossed and legs parted, he stared directly at Cherie as she returned the same passive aggressive look. Finally, Cherie broke the silence.

“I’ve given you a chance to consider my offer and I won’t let you keep my client much longer without charging her with something.”

I did a quick double take at Cherie’s words. I thought she was trying to get me out of here, not goad him into charging me with something. My mind hadn’t stopped racing since last night but I kept my face calm and composed.

Mills stood in the same position and held eye contact with Cherie for a few more moments before speaking.

“There’s still bail to be paid and other factors to go over.” He spoke gruffly before inclining his head slightly, motioning for Cherie to follow him.

Cherie stood smoothly and followed him out of the room. I sat incredibly still, not willing to let myself believe it was over just yet. And got only knows how big of a bail they were demanding. A few minutes later, Mills returned with Cherie trailing behind him. I jumped up and raced to the door that was still blocked by Mills’ large body.

“Looks like I’m free to go.” I said, stopping in front of him and smirking.

He stepped to the side but before I could make it past him, he grabbed my arm and yanked me to him. It took all of my self control to keep from reacting and striking back. I glanced up at Cherie who met my gaze with a bit of confusion in her eyes.

“Don’t think we haven’t figured it out.” Mills whispered gruffly near my head. “Zacky would take a thing like you to his bed. But he won’t be able to save you every time. Watch what you do – I’ve still got the mind and the time to lock your ass up. I’m sure your boyfriend would hate it if some angry prisoner decided to make you her bitch.”

I felt his breath heating my face and his threat replaying in my head.

“Let go of my client or you’ll be the one facing charges.” Cherie’s voice came out strong and demanding.

Mills dropped my arm and smirked first at Cherie and then down at me.

I kept my movements calm and smooth as we stopped to grab my possessions before waltzing out of the precinct. It wasn’t until we were seated in her car that Cherie dropped her “in control” façade and spoke.

“Shit!” She shouted, slamming her fists on the steering wheel.

“Whoa.” I leaned away from her. “Calm down, you did your job, I’m out.”

“Barely.” She groaned. “The last fucking thing we need is this police department paying close attention to what you do and – by relation- what Zacky does. They know who you are and the desperate little rats probably let you go so that they can use you in some twisted fucking way to get to Zacky. We have to tell him and that’s the fucking scaring part.” She rambled this all off as she started the car up.

“No.” I said my voice dropping and coming out harsher than intended. I took a breath and started over. “No, we do not need to tell Zacky. He’s probably already pissed enough at me – he does not need the extra ammo from this too.”

“You’re shitting me right?” Cherie turned away from the road to look at me. “Zacky will, literally, kill me if anything happens to you because I didn’t warn him.”

“Yeah well he’ll also kill you if he finds out that this shit isn’t wrapped up and sealed with the cops.” I didn’t mean to sound like a bitch to the woman that had just saved me some fairly serious jail time but it was the truth. Zacky hired people to get things done and he wouldn’t settle for anything less than what he expected. The look on her face said Cherie already knew this.

She let out a rough growl and I saw her hands tighten on the wheel.

“So I’m fucked either way.”

“No. Spare us both and don’t tell him.”

“And if something happens to you? If they show up at your door with a warrant? If they catch you on another job? If they fucking shoot you down on your way to the grocery store?! They’ll do anything to piss Zacky off enough that he does something irrational and ends up in jail for it.”

“I’m a big girl; I can handle myself. Let me take care of this my way, without Zacky finding out.

The car slowed in front of an ugly motel and Cherie turned to face me. Her face calm and collected again, she simply nodded before opening her door and hopping out. I followed her into the motel and down a hallway before she threw a door open. Coming up behind her, I glanced into the room and spotted all the guys and Val standing and sitting around the room.

Everyone stared at me and no one reacted for a moment. Then, suddenly Jimmy was in front of me, picking me up and spinning me around.

“Way to make it out of the slammer.” He said, laughing before dropping me back to the floor.
I looked around his tall, lanky body and saw Johnny let out a deep sigh and lean back in his chair. Val danced over in that agile way she moved and shoved my shoulder playfully.

“Don’t land your ass in jail again, yeah?”

I rolled my eyes at her before my gaze went to Zacky. He stood across the room, leaning back against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. His face was passive but the look in his eyes was nothing short of animalistic.

He pushed himself of the wall, dropping his arms and stalking slowly towards me. I knew he was beyond pissed and I knew now wasn’t the time to be turned on, but I couldn’t stop myself from admiring his fierce control and sexy walk as he moved closer to me.
He reached me and before I could react, his hands were gripping my arms and he pushed me back against the nearest wall, slamming his lips onto mine. The kiss was angry and possessive. He squeezed my arms almost to the point of pain and pushed me harder into the wall.

Part of me celebrated the fact that he wasn’t yelling or screaming at me for what I’d done. The other part of me knew that it wouldn’t last. The fury in the way he kissed me and the way he touched me was eventually going to teeter over. Once he got past being relieved to have me out of jail, the fighting and yelling would start.

He pulled back and without saying a word, dragged me out of the room and down the hall. I could hear everyone else follow behind us. Zacky pushed me up against another wall and kissed me with the same angry passion before continuing to drag me out of the hotel.

Jimmy, Matt, Zacky, Brian and Val had come down in Jimmy’s hummer while Johnny and Cherie had their cars with them. We divided up and I found myself sitting by Zack in Jimmy’s hummer. He didn’t speak so much as a word to me and he didn’t touch me again. By the time the first half hour of the drive had passed, the anticipation was getting to me and I wanted him to yell at me already so we could get past this. Anything would be better than the wildly uncomfortable and tense silence in the car.

Unfortunately, the ride remained quiet and I ended up sleeping for much of the three hour drive. All things considered, I hadn’t gotten much sleep last night and the hummer’s leather seats were far more comfortable than the prison cot. I hadn’t realized how exhausted I was until I shut my eyes and practically passed out.

When I woke up again, I was laying in mine and Zacky’s bed. I sat up quickly and looked to the side just in time to see Zacky walking out of the adjoining bathroom in nothing but a pair of jeans. Droplets of water ran down his chest as he toweled his hair.

After a moment, Zacky’s voice broke the silence.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” This was the first time he’d spoken to me since I had left him yesterday to follow Johnny. His voice was dangerously low and he spoke lowly – emphasizing each word.

I had spent some of those restless hours in jail thinking about how I would handle this situation. Zacky’s anger was expected but I wouldn’t sit back and let him yell at me. Despite spending the night in jail, I didn’t exactly regret what I had done.

“I needed to do it.” I spoke easily and with far more calm than Zacky had.

“Needed to do what? Lie to me? Follow Johnny on a high risk job? Sacrifice yourself so he could get away? Which fucking part of it did you need to do Toni?!” His voice escalated as him came closer and closer letting all his anger take over.

“I’m sorry I lied to you but I’m not going to take the rest of it back. Besides, if I had told you where I was going, there’s no way you would have let me.”

“Of course I wouldn’t fucking let you and for good fucking reasons seeing as how you managed to land yourself in jail.”

“Hey, don’t pin that on me! Those fuckers set Johnny up and I just happened to get caught in the crossfire so you need to calm the fuck down. I already apologized for lying to you and I’m not going to keep apologizing. I’m not one of your little minions that you can just control, and I’m going to make my own fucking choices.”

“You may have forgotten but you work for me. You are one of my ‘little minions’ and if you keep this lying shit up then maybe I’ll start treating you like one.”

“Fuck you!” I grabbed the pillow from the bed and chucked it as hard as I could at his head.
Zacky swatted the pillow away before it could hit him.

“I told you Johnny was on a fucking job and I told you to wait until he got back to settle your shit with him. Why is it so fucking hard for you to do what I say? There’s a goddamn reason why I don’t let you go on these deals.”

My eyes widened and I reached for the lamp on the bedside table.

“I am not some fucking robot that will do what you want.” I screamed, chucking the lamp at Zacky’s head.

He sidestepped the lamp and it hit the wall where his head had been, shattering in to pieces.

“If you fucking listened to me then your ass wouldn’t end up in jail.”

“If I listened to you, I’d never see the fucking outside world – you overprotective ass.” I waved my arms around as I shouted.

“Has it ever occurred to you that you can’t just fucking do what you want when you want to? Has it ever fucking occurred to you that working for me would actually mean doing whatever the fuck I tell you to do?”

“If you think I’m going to let you push me the fuck around then you’re going to have to get the fuck over yourself.”

“You want to run around and act like the big boys then you’d damn well better be prepared to take it like the big boys.”

“So what are you going to do? Kick my ass again like you did two years ago?” I spoke without thinking and the look that flashed across Zacky’s eyes showed that I had struck a nerve.

Without a word he spun on his heel and left the room, slamming the door shut behind him and leaving the room feeling as empty as the prison cell had.