Facedown

We stayed there for the rest of the afternoon, finally deciding we should probably get home and make something for dinner. So we made dinner, wondering where dad was, and constantly answering the door to people from town dropping by to pay their respects.

Finally, at 11:40 PM, Dad walked in. I ran up to him to hug him, "Dad!" I said softly, hugging him. He smelled strongly of alcohol.

"Mallie, come here," Sam whispered eyeing dad suspiciously.

"Dad, I missed you. This is so horrible," I continued ignoring Sam.

My father looked down at me, "Why are you two still up. Where's my dinner" he slurred angrily.

I looked up at my father; he had never used that tone with anybody, especially not me.

"Daddy, I, we, were waiting for you…"

"Mallie, come here," Sam whispered with urgency in his voice.

"Get to bed, both of you!" my father yelled.

"Daddy—"

"I said go to bed!" he bellowed.

Crying, I ran up the stairs, Sam on my heels. I crawled into my bed, Sam got in after me holding me. "Shh, Mallie, it's okay. Dad's just drunk, let him cool off," Sam whispered rubbing my hair.

"I don't, don't understand Sam, he's never talked to us like that," I sobbed looking at him.

"I think it's his way of handling mom's death, Mal—drinking," Sam sighed unsure. "Just stay away from him from now on when he comes home late, especially if he's drunk, okay?" he looked at me seriously.

"Okay Sam," I yawned, "I'm so tired."

"Go to sleep Mal, I'll stay if you want," Sam said as I nodded my head. He pulled the covers over my legs and started singing to me.

&&&

A few days later Sam was out with some friends and I was watching some TV show, I don't remember what it was, and I heard a car pull up and a door slam.

I quickly turned off the TV and got up from the couch as I heard the keys in the lock. I ran towards the stairs reaching the bottom one as the doorknob turned. I frantically ran up the stairs when I heard a booming, "Mallory!" at the bottom of the landing.

I felt my heart race faster and faster as I turned around looking at my father standing unstably at the bottom. "Hey daddy," I said adding a quick smile.

"Come down here," he ordered.

I thought about what Sam had told me the other night ‘Just stay away from him from now on when he comes home late, especially if he's drunk, okay?’ I closed my eyes, let out a deep breath, and walked slowly down the stairs. Stopping just out of reach of him, "Yes, daddy?"

"Where is Sam?" he growled.

"He, He's out with some friends, remember?" I answered quietly. It was one of the scariest moments of my life, my father never talked to me like that; he never made me feel unsafe.

Then it happened; I felt skin and bone hit with force across my face. I stumbled back and fell onto the stairs. Tears streamed down my face, I felt a lump in my throat and my eyes widened at my father's rage.

"Do not back talk me young lady!" he yelled as his hand came towards me again.

I frantically turned around and ran up the stairs feeling pain on my face. I closed my door and locked it as I heard footsteps storming up the stairs. I grabbed the phone on my nightstand and quickly dialed the familiar ten-digit number.

"Mallory Alyssa Collins, open up this goddamn door right now!" my father's voice sounded through the house as he banged on the door.

I felt myself shaking as the sound of ringing filled my ears. "Sam pick up, please pick!" I whispered to the phone.

"Hey this is Sam, leave stuff," I groaned closing my eyes. I reopened them and saw my face in the mirror. There was a bruise forming where his hand had slammed across my face. Tears streamed down my face as I heard my dad furiously slam on the door trying to open it.

Panicking I saw my open window and quickly crawled out onto the tree branch and shimmied down. Running the familiar path looking just as upset the few days before, I reached Jerry's diner in a few minutes and stopped in front of the door. I wiped away my tears quickly and looked in the window. Sam, Liz, and Ronnie were about to walk out with a few others. I stood looking down at my feet as laughing filled my ears.

"Mallie, what are you doing here?" Sam asked.

I looked up and everyone gasped.

"Mal, what happened?!" Sam asked grabbing me, holding my shaking body against his rubbing my hair.

I sobbed as he cooed, "Shh, Mal, shh. Tell me what happened."

I mumbled, "Dad, came home."

"What?"

I gestured him to lean down and I mumbled in his ear the answer.

He straightened up and I looked up at him. Fury boiled in his eyes, he held me closer and everyone stared.

"Hey guys, Mallie, and I are going to go, I'll see you later," Sam said struggling to stay calm.

He picked me up and I wrapped my arms around his neck and covered my face into his chest. Everyone said bye and he walked to his car placing me in the passenger seat. He got in the driver seat and started driving towards home.

"Mal," he started after a minute, "What happened?" His voice was gentle, not harsh. He wasn't angry or disappointed in me, but he was worried; more worried than I think he's ever been.

I replayed what happened tears pouring down my face. He reached the curb and parked glaring up at the house. He held me until I finished crying then helped me climb back into my room. It appeared that our father had given up on entering and the sound of his snores drifted through the crack in the door. Sam stayed with me again that night, singing me to sleep.

I loved my brother more than anything. He was my safety net. He was the strength I never had. I didn't realize how much I needed him until then. But I still took it for granted…until he was gone.