"Who Would've Thought Getting Knocked Down Would End So Well?"

I began seeing Billie Joe almost every day, but also spending more time with Mike and Tre. I immediately realized that Mike was someone I could confide in. He'd had a difficult childhood and I was surprised when he'd talked with me about it, that he trusted me enough to share something so personal. I was seeing a side of Green Day that their fans knew nothing about and I preferred this side.

Don't get me wrong, I loved the Billie Joe, Mike and Tre that we all knew about through interviews and concerts, but they were so much more than that. I was witnessing the fatherly side of Tre when he spent time with Frankito, or even when he spoke with Ramona over the phone. And let me tell you, he's a great dad, always wanting the best for his kids. And of course there was Billie Joe. He shared a lot of his life with me and I was falling for him.

I was thinking about all of this as I walked to Billie Joe's house. It was a half hour walk but it wasn't too hot outside and I wanted to enjoy such a beautiful day. When I arrived at Billie Joe's house he was already outside, waiting for me.

"Ames, ready to go?"

I nodded. He smiled and leaned in to give me a quick kiss and took my hand, interlocking his fingers with mine.

"Let's go."

We had decided to enjoy a day outdoors. We were going to walk to a nearby park just to talk, and spend a calm, relaxing day alone together. We continued to walk until we'd arrived at the park. It was large and beautiful, teeming with trees that stretched their giant branches out to shelter us from the sun. There was a small pond at the centre of the park where children were racing paper sailboats across its cool, glassy surface, their cherubic faces smiling with excitement. I glanced at them and smiled. Billie Joe looked at me.

"You ok? You've been kind of quiet today."

I squeezed his hand. "Yeah I'm fine, just thinking about a lot of things."

"Like what, babe?"

I sighed. "I just can't believe I'm here in California with you. And I can't believe I'm friends with Mike and Tre and you've all been so good to me, from the beginning. It's surreal. Last year at this time I was still in Montreal, struggling to get out of there. But now I'm so happy."

Billie Joe smiled at me as we continued to walk. "Why did you leave Montreal anyway?" He looked at me and could tell that my mind was elsewhere. I sighed again.

"Are you sure you want to hear about my dysfunctional life? It's a long story."

"Well, you know about mine."

"Ok." We settled ourselves onto a bench and I looked down, trying to collect my thoughts.

"Take your time." I nodded.

"I don't really know where to start. Ummm... Ok. Well, for as long as I can remember, my father has been abusive to my mom, my sister, and I. My sister moved out early - she was the lucky one. I have other siblings from his previous marriage but I don't really consider them family, and my father never treated them that way. One of them lives here in California, actually." I was rambling. I tried to focus on what I really wanted to say.

"So my dad would insult us and most of the time he'd yell at us for no reason. He would yell at my mom on the bus, at church, wherever. And he admitted constantly that he was proud to embarrass her like that in public. She was only allowed to go out when he said she could. Many times she'd say she was going grocery shopping but really went over to my sister's place to get away for a little while. Sometimes he'd scream at her and he'd wrap his hands around her throat to strangle her. One time he ripped her necklace right off her neck and threw it at her. He would cheat on her too."

I glanced at Billie Joe, then looked back down. "The thing is, my family seemed well off - we appeared to be financially stable and happy to the outside world but really we were miserable and struggled to make ends meet. And the more financial problems we had, the more he would fly off the handle. He began threatening her and would threaten her life... But she just couldn't leave him. I couldn't move out because I was genuinely scared for her well being, both mentally and physically."

Billie Joe just stared at me. His eyes were sad but the look he gave me was an encouragement to continue. I took a deep breath and continued to explain.

"My mom was beyond stressed and my dad treated her like a servant and told her that he didn't love her. No one outside of my family knew what he was truly like, they wouldn't have believed me or would have thought that I was exaggerating, well, except for Drew, who experienced it first-hand..." I could not finish my sentence, the tears started to stream down my face as my mind was flooded with painful memories. Billie Joe wiped my tears away with his thumb and cupped my face with his hand.

"If you don't want to talk about this, you don't have to. I'll understand. I don't want you to have to relive that difficult time in your life."

"I-I'm ok." I stammered, then continued with what I wanted to say. "Th-this continued until I was twenty-three. For my whole life and for her whole marriage we were miserable. One day, my dad wasn't at home and my mom was telling me about a girl she'd seen my father flirting with - a girl not much older than me - and it had hurt her feelings badly. She was confiding in me, telling me about some of the horrible things he had done to her; she was criticizing him and she had every right. We didn't hear the front door open and he'd heard everything that she'd been saying. He screamed harder than I ever heard before, telling her to pack her things and get out, that she was poisoning my mind and trying to turn me against him." I started to cry again. "Sh-sh-she begged him to give her another ch-chance but he wouldn't listen and kept screaming. Then there was silence, and a thud. She'd collapsed. Her heart... Her heart gave out."

I sobbed quietly and continued my story through tears. "I ran into the living room to see what happened and there she was, lying on the floor. Why her?! I could not even look at my father. I called for an ambulance, almost in hysterics. I kneeled on the floor next to my mom and held her close, she was already unconscious. I begged her not to leave me, that she was my everything. The ambulance arrived minutes later." I looked up at Billie Joe.

I was about to break down completely, my voice strangled with tears. "She died on the way to the hospital. After that, I told my father what I thought of him and blamed him for her death. I told him I would never speak to him again. After I lost my mom, there was no reason for me to stay there. I moved in with Drew's family for a while and then with my sister for a few weeks and applied for jobs outside of the city. I was offered employment in California, so I packed my things and never looked back."

"Babe, I'm so sorry."

Billie Joe grabbed me and held me close. I put my head on his shoulder and cried. Hard. I was shaking in his arms and he held me tighter, desperate to calm me down but feeling helpless. Passers by looked at me questioningly, but with sympathy. We sat for a very long time, and Billie Joe held me. I cried until there were no tears left.

"I'm sorry, Billie Joe."

"For what?"

"I'm sorry I just burdened you with all that."

"I care about you so much, Amelia, nothing concerning you will ever be a burden. Remember that."

He stood up and pulled me with him. He wrapped his arm around my waist and we continued to walk. We walked in silence for a few minutes when Billie Joe stopped suddenly and looked me in the eye. "I've been wanting to ask you something for a while but I've been nervous about it, and the timing might be a bit off, but I need to ask you."

I became nervous myself. I had no idea what he was going to ask me. I was afraid that maybe my past had scared him off. "Go ahead, you can ask me anything."

"Do you... Uh, would you... Amelia, will you be my girlfriend?"

I was relieved and happy. A smile appeared on my face.

"I'd love to."

He smiled back and kissed me gently in the late afternoon sun. I felt so safe here, and so close to Billie Joe, my boyfriend.