NeverWars
Crazy Aunt Jane
"So how was school today, Milo?" Madra Darling asked her youngest son while taking a bite mashed potatoes as was her daily routine.
"We disected a cows eye!" he said with such enthusiasm you could tell he had been holding it in until dinner so that he could descust everyone at the same time.
"Uhg!" Jennifer cried out. " Thats gross!"
" And the best part was when Mr. Green held up the sack so you could see the eye balls floating in the blood!"
Setting down her fork Willow asked with disbelief. " May i be excused?!"
" Milo Alan Darling! I will not allow that kind of talk at the dinner table!" Shouted their father,
Barm. " And no you may not, Will. their will be no need for that."
" What about you, Jennifer?" Their mother asked despertly trying to change the subject.
"Well Danny asked out Tara today but she said no cuz shes madly in love with Matt whos dating Danny's sister Heather who still has feelings for her exboyfriend grant who is now gay and dating nick whos brother adam has a thing for some Sophmore chick whos brother is best friends with the schools star quarterback, Kyle, who took me to homecoming last year but i dumped him cuz i found out he kissed Tara at Heathers party last fall to see if Matt like her but he didnt cuz he was still dating Kyles sister Rachel. Anyways right after that Tara asked out Matt and now Heather is gonna kill her."
"Uhhh..." Their father stared blankly.
" Did you follow any of that?" Milo asked Will.
"But Jenn, i thought you and danny were going."their mother said concerned.
"Mom, That was like three months ago!"Jenn replyed annoyed.
"So.." their father asked quickly,"how about you, Will, how was school?"
"Boreing" she drop her eyes to her plate and began picking at her food.
"Come now, surely you have something to share." their mother said smileling with what was suposed to look like encouragement.
Will was about to reply that she did not infact have anything to share and that her life was her own business when the phone began to ring.Jenn squeled and jumped out of her chair."I bet thats heather now, she said she'd call me after she kick tara's as-"
" Jennifer Sandra Darling-"their mother began but Jenn was already in the kitchen.
" Hello?"she asked excitedly, a pause and then "oh..." her voice was drenched with dissapointment."yeah sure hang on a sec." she came back in the kitchen an glared at her father as if it was his fault Heather didn't call."It's for you."
"Hello?" father asked form the kitchen."uh huh." a pause and then "Is she alright?" the table grew silent." I see, tell her we'll be there right away. he stood int he kitchen for awhile and waited."kids," he said "pack your things we're going to london your great aunt jane had a heart attack.
"Crazy Aunt Jane?!"Milo asked clearly shocked.
"Peter Pan Aunt Jane?!" Jenn asked her eyes growing big.
"How many Crazy Aunt Janes do you have?" Will asked her sister, descusted with how dumb she could be.
"We disected a cows eye!" he said with such enthusiasm you could tell he had been holding it in until dinner so that he could descust everyone at the same time.
"Uhg!" Jennifer cried out. " Thats gross!"
" And the best part was when Mr. Green held up the sack so you could see the eye balls floating in the blood!"
Setting down her fork Willow asked with disbelief. " May i be excused?!"
" Milo Alan Darling! I will not allow that kind of talk at the dinner table!" Shouted their father,
Barm. " And no you may not, Will. their will be no need for that."
" What about you, Jennifer?" Their mother asked despertly trying to change the subject.
"Well Danny asked out Tara today but she said no cuz shes madly in love with Matt whos dating Danny's sister Heather who still has feelings for her exboyfriend grant who is now gay and dating nick whos brother adam has a thing for some Sophmore chick whos brother is best friends with the schools star quarterback, Kyle, who took me to homecoming last year but i dumped him cuz i found out he kissed Tara at Heathers party last fall to see if Matt like her but he didnt cuz he was still dating Kyles sister Rachel. Anyways right after that Tara asked out Matt and now Heather is gonna kill her."
"Uhhh..." Their father stared blankly.
" Did you follow any of that?" Milo asked Will.
"But Jenn, i thought you and danny were going."their mother said concerned.
"Mom, That was like three months ago!"Jenn replyed annoyed.
"So.." their father asked quickly,"how about you, Will, how was school?"
"Boreing" she drop her eyes to her plate and began picking at her food.
"Come now, surely you have something to share." their mother said smileling with what was suposed to look like encouragement.
Will was about to reply that she did not infact have anything to share and that her life was her own business when the phone began to ring.Jenn squeled and jumped out of her chair."I bet thats heather now, she said she'd call me after she kick tara's as-"
" Jennifer Sandra Darling-"their mother began but Jenn was already in the kitchen.
" Hello?"she asked excitedly, a pause and then "oh..." her voice was drenched with dissapointment."yeah sure hang on a sec." she came back in the kitchen an glared at her father as if it was his fault Heather didn't call."It's for you."
"Hello?" father asked form the kitchen."uh huh." a pause and then "Is she alright?" the table grew silent." I see, tell her we'll be there right away. he stood int he kitchen for awhile and waited."kids," he said "pack your things we're going to london your great aunt jane had a heart attack.
"Crazy Aunt Jane?!"Milo asked clearly shocked.
"Peter Pan Aunt Jane?!" Jenn asked her eyes growing big.
"How many Crazy Aunt Janes do you have?" Will asked her sister, descusted with how dumb she could be.