Never Let This Go

All the way home I cried. I decided not to ring Josh to pick me up. I need time to think about what I’m gonna tell people, and what am I going to do? I mean I’m 15, I can’t have a baby now, but I don’t know if I could go through with an abortion. And also I couldn’t bring up my rapist’s child. I have to decided what I’m gonna do before its too late, much I don’t have much time. When I got to Josh’s house, I found him sat outside playing with Isabella. He was really good with the little ones. One day he will be I great dad. He spotted me and came up to me. He asked about what the doctor said, I couldn’t lie to him so I told him. He just stood there stunned. He finally spoke after a few minutes of silence.
“What you going to do?”
“I don’t know but I have to choose soon, she checked to see how far I was. I’m over two months.”
“Ok lets go inside and talk” So we went inside and up to his room and went through my options. After talking it about it I decided that it would be best if I aborted it. Josh was really supportive. He doesn’t like the idea of abortions but he also thought I would be for the best. So the next morning I made a appointment for as soon as possible, I just wanna get this whole thing over with. I still had to tell my mum, oh the fun this is going to be. I walked into the kitchen where she was sat with her boyfriend.
“Hey mom could I speak to you for a minute”
“Yeah sure” she got up from the stool and walked into the living room “So What’s up?”
“Well I’m pregnant and it’s not Josh’s” I think she got what I meant after a few seconds but still I explained that it was the rapist.
“So have you decided what your going to do?”
“Yeah, I going to have an abortion” she looked shocked.
“How can you do that? You have been brought up to learn that is not a option” she shouted
“Yes it is. It is when you have been raped and you don’t wanna bring your rapist baby up. Not to mention I’m only 15” I shouted back at her
“Well I was raped, and I got pregnant with you, and I still had you” I just stood there in shock
“You what?” I said quietly
“You heard me” My eyes started welling up.
“So your telling me I was a unwanted child”
“No that’s not what I meant”
“Well it sure sounds like it. Anyway it my decision, no one else, and I’m going to go through with it”
“If you get rid of the baby, you will regret it”
“No, I want” I said as I walked towards the front door. I walked out of the house and down the street and towards the park. I just need to get away from everyone. Once I got to the park I went and sat down on the swings and thought about what my mom said. I know that she was mad but still you shouldn’t say something like that. I began to cry. I’ll never be able to look at my mum in the same way now. I heard footsteps walking towards me. I looked up to see Josh’s mum with Isabella and Jon.
“Hiya love, are you alright?”
“Yeah I’m fine I just had a argument with my mom”
“Oh right, how did things go at the doctors?”
“Not good , I’m two months pregnant” it was silent for a moment I think she was trying to work out dates to when I was raped. I didn’t think she wanted to ask who the farther was. After I while I decided to break the silence.
“I really don’t know what to do. My mom doesn’t want me to have an abortion and I do because I can’t bring up a kid at my age, I’m still a child.”
“You could always give it up for adoption, therefore you can give the baby to someone that will love it. And if you wanted nothing to do with the baby, you don’t have to.”
“Really?” She nodded. “I have never thought about that.”
“Just remember its your decision no one else’s, and do what you think is best”
“Thanks I will. So do you think Josh is going to put up with my mood swings for the next 7 months and more morning sickness”
“Yeah course he will, he is crazy about you, and he said it himself he will be there for you all the way”