Dude Looks Like a Lady

*Fast forward a week*
I was wrapping up some presents for Lizzie, it was after the eve of Christmas Eve. I had presents for nearly everyone. Well, everyone but Mikey. What could I get him to show him I loved him?

We’d done the shopping about day 2 of his break, leaving Lizzie and Donna and Donald because Lizzie wasn’t keen on shopping. And being us, we bought everybody presents really rather quickly and then went home and made love. Copiously. What? We’re married.

Anyway, from then Mikey has done lots of bonding with Lizzie and I’ve done the wrapping. Everyone was coming here for Christmas, we had a big house and I liked playing host. Everyone was staying too, but Jamia, Christa, me and Donna were all working out who was cooking what. Eventually we decided that Christa and I would do Christmas day, and Donna and Jamia would do Boxing Day.

Involved in the Mikey bonding has been the Mikey doing the yacky things, potty training, saying No… the stuff that Mommy had had to do before. It was quite nice to suddenly be parent of the month with Lizzie, but I knew where Mikey was coming from when he was exhausted at night.

Right now, when I was wrapping the final present and crossing it off my list, I don’t know why but this baby really likes me to make lists. Oh god, it’s going to be a nerd baby. No way. Oh well, we’ll love it no matter what. Mikey and I decided that, if any of our children have any problems we made them we’ll damn well keep them. It’s how life works, we might have to give up our dreams of being together as much as possible, but hey ho, life deals out shit. You have to deal with the shit you’re given.

Anyway, baby rant over (I was having lots of them – this baby’s going to be very strange), I sat back in the chair I’d stolen because it was comfy and thought about what on Earth I could get Mikey. Well, I know he likes Unicorns but I can’t exactly buy one of those, now can I? I sighed and rubbed my hands over my eyes and through my hair, kneading the heels of hands into my eyes.

“Bugger.” I mumble to myself, and suddenly I remember that I don’t have any butter. Bugger and Butter, slightly different syllables. I sigh and heave myself to my feet, I wasn’t even that pregnant but I was just stiff from sitting all day. It was like being on tour, without the constant motion round you.

The week of tour was interesting, living that close up with everyone was good fun. However, living that close to everyone for months at a time, and no thank you: I’d most certainly have a bus for me and my family and that would be that, I’d hide away in there when it all got too much, as it was likely too. Some people, Frank, had far too much energy. I opened the door of my office, and closed it behind me as I gathered up the keys for the car and pulled my jacket and scarf on, eyeing the weather and grabbing a hat too.

“Where are you off to?” Mikey asks me, wrapping his muscular arms about me.

“The shops to get butter. Do you need anything?”

He shakes his head, “Only you.”

I roll my eyes and turn my head to kiss him softly. “What do you want for Christmas, Mikey?” I ask him, deciding to confront my problem head on.

His eyes bug, “You haven’t got my present yet?!” He squawks, looking offended.

“Have you got mine?” I counter, watching him blush. He giggles and shakes his head.

“I’ve got all the rooms ready. How did you manage when it was you and Lizzie?”

“With difficulty, I admit. But what do you want?” He shrugs, and kissed my nose again.

“I don’t know.” I pull a fake cross face and sigh once more.

“We’ll see what Santa sends as inspiration then, won’t we?” I tease him.

“Whoa, wait.” He commands, pulling back on jacket gently as I turn to leave. I turn my head back and raise my eyebrows, “What do you want?”

I pull a face, twisting my lips to the side and frowning a little before shrugging and making a non committal noise, “I don’t really know. Uhhh, some pretty jewellery would be nice, you know something that’s more like my pendant than anything else I might have.”

He pulls a face of desperation and nods, “Be back quick, you’re going to have to look after Lizzie whilst I go shopping for you then.” He whispers into my ear, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

“Ok. I’ll get the butter and think about what I can get you.” I tell him, kissing his nose and smiling slightly as he lets go and jog out to the car.

I arrived at the main store to buy large amounts of butter and cream. I cooked like my mother, with lots of cream and butter, everything tasted so much nicer like that. But I also knew, that Donna would want to make lots of cookies and biscuits, which involved Milk as well – so I got some of that too. In the end I ended up with butter, milk and cream. And as I had a mega recognition of the craving I was having, I got about six packets of wine gums.

As I left, I looked about me a bit, chewing on some wine gums and noticing my cravings leave for a while. In so doing I thrust the wine gums into my coat pocket and the rest of the shopping into the car. I prepared to get into the car when I saw a huge poster showing a picture of Billy from The Smashing Pumpkins and saying that he was doing a one off tour of him playing Smashing Pumpkins songs. I grinned, here was my present to Mikey.

I headed over to the ticket booth and grinned as I asked for five tickets, so Mikey could take the rest of the guys with him or just four other people who like them if one of them didn’t. I paid for the tickets with cash so Mikey wouldn’t find out how expensive they were. I tucked them into the inner pocket of my jacket and headed back to the car.

I was no longer panicking about Christmas because I had the best present I could have for the love of my life. And what was even better about those tickets? They went on sale that day too.