Dude Looks Like a Lady

Well, everyone turned up in time for Brunch. By everyone I mean; Avenged Sevenfold, The Used, the rest of My Chemical Romance and their girls, as well as Jamia’s parents, Frank parents and Mikey and Gerard’s parents. Mine were in England.

Due to the whining of Frank and Mikey everyone opened one present on Christmas Eve, even the parents and Avenged Sevenfold and they weren’t staying for Christmas. Lizzie didn’t truly understand what was happening and who all these people were but she happily wandered amongst them batting eyelids at people and pouting until they cuddled her. She is such an attention whore.

Towards the end of the day Avenged Sevenfold, Mr and Mrs Jamia and Mrs Iero left. Avenged were heading back to Cali for the actual day and Jamia and Frank’s parents were headed back to Mrs Iero’s house due to not having enough space for them in my house and having Christmas with Bob’s parents and Ray’s as well.

Frank and Bert made sure that Lizzie didn’t feel out of her depth, by acting like babies and insisting that I put some milk, cookies and carrots out for Santa and the reindeer. Lizzie couldn’t grow up not knowing about the oh so wonderful Saint Nick. Eventually settling everyone into bed and making sure Lizzie was sleeping peacefully Mikey and I retired to bed, him draining the milk cup and eating a couple of the biscuits before returning the carrots to the vegetable drawer in the pantry. Frank and Bert never went near there, they’d never know.

I slept long and well, with Mikey rubbing my back and whispering soothing things in my ears. It was a gigantic weight off my shoulders that he knew how I felt and he could now attempt to remedy it. I was always worried about the fans, being an Agony Aunt meant that I spent a fair amount of time on the internet and saw the forums these kids posted on. Some of the little bastards were evil little shits, cursing my children. I didn’t really care that the hated me, as long as I didn’t diminish the fan base of the band. If they hated my kids I was always unimpressed and mostly rather hurt. They (even the unborn one!) were both half Mikey – it’s not like I just spawned them for fun. You know; let’s populate the world with mini – Lou’s because I want to take over the world. Let’s face it; if I’d wanted to do that I wouldn’t have waited this long between having kiddie – winks.

Christmas morning dawned fair too damn early, with Frank and Bert bouncing on our bed, Frank holding Lizzie who was screaming in ecstasy at being cuddled and bounced. Her idea of heaven at nearly two years old, I always forgot just how big she was getting. She was still my ickle babykins. Swearing roundly at Frank and Bert, Mikey threw them out telling me to continue sleeping because I didn’t need the early morning stress. Unfortunately I was now wide awake and planning my revenge. As well as mentally storing the information of never letting Frank and Bert be in the same place…ever again.

Masses of food was eaten, presents opened, kisses shared (some more passionate than others. Like when Mikey gave me my ring and he got his tickets.) and a generally happy atmosphere pervaded the air, almost drunken if you will. It was one of the best Christmases ever. No – one was forcing a smile, everyone was genuinely happy and Mikey didn’t feel the slightest bit bad about cheating Frank and Bert about Santa. I’d have been tempted to leave the milk and say that he preferred whisky, but that was my current craving worryingly enough.

As that day drew to a close and Boxing Day drew closer, everyone’s eyes closed during the Christmas movie due to too much good food and for most of them, too much alcohol. Lizzie was fast asleep due to the excitement, in her cot, preparing to be a tiny terror on the morrow when everyone was nursing a hangover and preparing to piss off back to their homes. Much as I love being a hostess and being surrounded by people it would be nice to be us three once more. Just us three, and be able to wander about in my nightie when I felt like it. Not to be woken by Frank and Bert at some unearthly hour.

Eventually I grew bored of the snores and the cheesy Christmas programmes and I returned to bed, sleeping peacefully through the night and well into Boxing Day hopefully.