Hey, Darling.

I felt like I was holding my breath. I guess, if you think about it, that kind of sounds bad, but it’s the truth. Everything with Kennedy had been so surreal, so I guess there was just this pessimistic part of me that was anxious for the jerk in him to return. I enjoyed the dates, and the closeness, and everything that went along with being “together”, but I was just waiting for the one night that he didn’t call, or where he let out some rude comment.

It had been three days, and it still hadn’t happened. That pessimistic part of me was starting to die slowly, replaced by a happier version who wasn’t taking things for granted.

I was still nervous, though. Every time I saw Kennedy my heart jumped. Then it started beating erratically. When he kissed me, sometimes I swear it stopped for a second, and then it started beating again. It was unfamiliar and it made me shake sometimes, from the feelings that coursed through me, but it was amazing.

We were going to dinner tonight, with everyone else. Kennedy wanted to (officially) make sure everyone knew that we were together (and by that, he meant Garrett, and he thought I didn’t know that but I did). I had asked him if we could just do it at someone’s house, not wanting to have the fuss of actually going out, but he seemed to stop me every time I opened my mouth to protest. Damn that boy and his lips.

I was told we were only going to Applebee’s, so instead of getting really dressed up and spending a good hour and a half stressing over whether or not I looked alright, I put on a pair of jeans (dark wash but still light fabric, because even though it was seven o’clock it was still eighty-two degrees out) and a white v-neck. I was tempted to go searching for my favorite pair of Vans, but I didn’t want my boyfriend and I to look like twins, so I just settled on a pair of cute navy flats.

I ended up straightening my hair for once, and that alone took me a good forty-five minutes, because I hadn’t exactly realized how long the layers were getting. When I was done, though, I was done.

Kennedy was already here, because he had texted me three minutes prior telling me that he was coming up the walkway. I almost texted him back to ask if Mia was going to be there, but I didn’t have the guts. Mia and I hadn’t talked in three days, because I hadn’t had an opportunity to talk to her.

I guess, if I was a good sister, that would be eating me up inside, but I was too preoccupied to care.

“Baby,” Kennedy called as I heard the door to the bedroom shut. I bet my grandmother hadn’t even noticed him enter the house. “Are you ready yet?”

I emerged from the bathroom, nodding as I grabbed my bag. “Yup.” I nodded.

Kennedy smiled, before leaning over and pecking me on the lips. The kiss, meant to be gentle and innocent, didn’t stay that way long, as Kennedy pressed his lips harder to mine and brought his hand up to the small of my back.

It felt new, the feeling of comfort and familiarity that came with him touching me, but I wouldn’t say it was unwelcome. I think, because we both knew that this was probably only going to be a summer fling, that we were moving really fast.

He tried to maneuver his tongue into my mouth, but I wouldn’t let him. When he tried it again, I pulled away. He whined.

I rolled my eyes. “Kenny, we’re gonna be late.”

He just shrugged. “Rawrrr,” he protested against my lips, before sighing and then nodding. “Fine.”

I smiled, pecked him one more time directly on the mouth, and then started heading down the stairs. He trailed behind me for a couple seconds, before he reached out and grabbed my hand in his. Then we both squished our bodies through the narrow staircase.

I could see my grandmother in her tea room, and I used my free hand to signal Kenny quiet. We walked across the hardwood floor softly, trying to make as little noise as possibly. I could tell she heard us - her head perked up, and her body tensed. She didn’t say anything, however, and for that I was grateful.

Kenny’s silver Honda Civic was parked against the curb, and we each got in silently. I put my bag down on the floor and watched him fiddle with the radio. He put it on some rock station, and then he put the volume down low. He turned the engine over, and I watched him as he pulled away from the curb.

He looked over, saw me watching him, and smiled. “What?”

I shook my head. “Nothing. You just look really concentrated when you’re driving.”

Kennedy laughed. “Really? I’m kind of just thinking of the fastest way to get there, get this over with, and then go somewhere so I can maul you.”

I said nothing, just shook my head. He was always really interested in mauling me. I couldn’t really object, though, because sometimes I think I wanted it almost as much as him. The kissing and stuff, of course. We hadn’t gotten to sex yet. We hadn’t even been going out a week, and I was not easy.

“So,” I attempted to break the silence that had settled over the car. “How are we going to tell them?”

Kennedy just shrugged. “I don’t think I really have to say anything.”

“Then how are they going to know?”

“Molly,” he said. “I can barely go twenty minutes without touching you in some way, shape, or form, so I’m pretty sure that they’ll get the picture.”

Again, I just rolled my eyes. It was true, though. He seemed to always need to be touching me. Even now, as we sat next to each other, our pinkie’s were tangled together. When we were walking, there was always an arm around my shoulder, a hand on the small of my back, lips on the side of my neck. He was very affectionate.

“This is going to be so weird,” I murmured to myself, mostly.

I guess he heard, though, because he sent me a questioning glance.

I elaborated. “I haven’t seen or talked to Mia in three days. She’s probably still pissed at me for the whole kissing-you-whilst-you-were-in-a-relationship thing.”

“Why? She didn’t hide her distaste of Bonnie. She practically flipped her off every time she saw her.” He said.

“I don’t know,” I truly didn’t. I was just as confused as she was. “It really sucks.”

“I’m sorry, baby,” he smiled over at me, and I couldn’t help but smile back. Even if I was in the biggest bitch of a mood, Kennedy’s smiles could get me responding. They just had that effect on me.

“It’s alright. I’m almost positive that she’ll get over it soon.” I attempted to fake my nonchalance, but I could still hear some of the emotion in my voice. It wasn’t alright. I hated it when people were mad at me for a long period of time, especially Mia.

We arrived at Applebee’s ten minutes later, and I could already see John’s car in the parking lot. I had no idea what everyone else drove, but I assumed they were all here, too.

Kennedy walked around the car when he got out, and pulled me to him. I rested my head on his chest, and sighed as I felt comfortable.

“If she’s still acting like a bitch, we’ll leave,” he said, and I nodded into his chest. I wrapped my arms around him too, wanting to be closer. We stood there, and I don’t even think there was enough room for air to pass between our bodies.

“You’re perfect,” he whispered into my hair, and I hid my blushing face.

“You’re corny,” I whispered back, and then when I was sure that the redness in my cheeks had died down just a little bit, I stood on my tip-toes so I could nuzzle my face into his neck. I left kisses next to the exposed collarbone from his shirt.

“Mmm,” he let out in contentment, and his hands slid further down my back. For a second, I think it made me nervous. But then I remembered how much time I had, and I just kept repeating it to myself.

Two months. You’ve got two months to soak in everything you possibly can.

“We should get in there,” I whispered seconds later, and then I felt him shiver as my lips barely grazed his neck, and I smiled.

“Do we have to?” He whined.

I shook my head. “No, but we probably should.”

He didn’t move, but still agreed. “You’re probably right.”

I pulled back, and then very quickly, kissed him one more time. Then I pulled away and started walking towards the entrance. When I looked back at him, his was standing there, looking slightly amused but slightly aggravated at the same time. I rolled my eyes, before stopping and holding my hand out.

I kept my eyes straight ahead, but it didn’t even take thirty seconds for him to reach me and enclose his fingers around mine.

I liked the way it felt when he held my hand. His hand was bigger than mine, but not so big that I felt like I had my hand in a bear claw. It was big enough to totally enclose around it, and hold it firmly. I felt safe when he was holding my hand. I also felt weird for developing these emotions so quickly.

I wasn’t even paying attention as Kennedy talked to the host about the people we were meeting here, and I walked slightly behind him meekly, not wanting to see everyone. I still felt really embarrassed because of the last time I had seen everyone. It was then when I decided to no longer go to any parties. They made me uncomfortable and I generally ended up embarrassed the shit out of myself.

They were all gathered around a big, L-shaped booth. I didn’t really even think people noticed that we were there. It was either that or they were ignoring us.

Jared was the first person to look up. He smiled at us, “Kenny! Molly! Hey.”

Kennedy exchanged greetings, and I just smiled at him. I felt like a big bundle of nerves.

Pat smiled next, and then John waved. Molly was sitting right next to him, but she did nothing. She just continued to read her menu. Garrett was the last person who said anything, and he looked really weird. He didn’t look sad. He just looked…out of it. I smiled at him, and he smiled back.

“How have you been?” He asked me, and I just nodded and then shrugged.

“I’ve been okay,” I answered, and then I lowered my voice down. “I know now. I know.”

He didn’t seem to understand for a second, but then he nodded. “Good. I’m glad. You look happy.”

I nodded. “Yeah. As happy as I can be with my sister ignoring me, but whatever.” I could hear the angry tone in my voice, but I let it slide. Garrett didn’t seem to judge.

“She’ll come around soon,” he said. “She’s been all moody and sad too.”

I just nodded and then turned to Kennedy, as he sat down. I slid in next to him, right across from Mia. She wasn’t looking at me. She kept her eyes downcast.

I couldn’t repress my sigh. Kennedy’s thumb rubbed circles on the top of my hand, and he leant over to kiss the top of my head.

“Just tell me if you want to leave,” he whispered. I just nodded.

All the guys were looking at us, and they kind of looked like they wanted some type of explanation.

“So, are you dating?” Jared asked.

Kennedy nodded before I had the time to react. “Yup.” He sounded really, sure; really confident.

“How long has this been going on?” Pat asked. I think he was trying to hide his excitement. He looked really happy.

“About three days,” Kennedy laughed, and then everyone laughed with him.

“How did it happen?” Garrett interjected. I felt kind of tense around him, and I didn’t know why. Kennedy and him were cool now, though, so I guess there wasn’t really anything to worry about.

Even though I had the sneaking suspicion that if Kennedy hadn’t confessed his feelings for me, Garrett would have sooner or later.

Or maybe that’s just me thinking too highly of myself.

I looked over at Kennedy to say something, but he was just looking at me. “He came over a couple days after the party, and he apologized, I guess. We started yelling at each other, and he was getting me really mad. And then he kissed me. I think that’s just kind of how it happened,”

I sounded so unsure of myself. I sounded really nervous talking around these people. I hated it.

“You seem to kiss him a lot,”

She hadn’t meant for me to hear. She was supposed to say it slyly, mutter it under her breath. But she wasn’t really good at that. And I heard her.

I was so annoyed that I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t stop the words from spilling out of my mouth. I just couldn’t keep quiet.

“Why do you have to be such a bitch?”

Mia looked shocked for a second, but she was still quick with her tongue. “Why do you have to be such a whore?” she shot back.

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, I’m a whore, sure. I’m sorry that I kissed Kennedy. Big whoop de fucking do. It happened once when he had a girlfriend, and they had been going out for what? Not even a week?”

Mia just glared at me. “Whatever. You’re being a fucking hypocrite. You always bitch about cheaters and the girls that make them cheat. Now you’re just one of them. You’re a whore!”

“So I’m exactly like you, then?” The iciness in my voice surprised me, and everyone looked surprised, even Mia. She might even have looked a little hurt. “I kissed a boy once, and I didn’t even know he had a girlfriend! You, on the other hand…”

“What the fuck have I done?” She taunted. “Huh? You think you’re so great? You’re still a whore.”

“I’m not the one that gave Jack a blowjob just because he said that you looked pretty in a shirt. And you knew he had been going out with Anna for a year. You were the one that got them together!”

Mia looked shocked, and John looked a little disappointed. He was giving her this look, one that clearly said, “I didn’t know you were like that” and Mia was looking at me like she wanted to jump across the table and beat me down.

“You just can’t stand me being happy,” I continued, and I ignored Kennedy as he leaned over and whispered about how maybe I should stop now. “You can never stand me being happy! Every time something good happened for me, you always found something wrong, or you suddenly had some huge problem that everyone had to focus on! You can’t handle anyone being happier than you.”

Mia looked hurt, and there was this gleam of satisfaction that coursed through me. Which was wrong, on so many different levels, but she deserved to have the truth every once in a while.

“That’s not true,” she said, and I just shook my head.

“You know it is. You’re always like this. And then you call me a hypocrite? You’ve never apologized for anything you’ve ever done to me, and now you’re getting mad over something like this?” My voice was lower now, not as loud and harsh.

The feelings of anger were fading, replaced by ones of sadness and a bit of regret. I shouldn’t have yelled at her, but she did deserve it, I guess.

“Well what do you want me to say?” She asked me, looking up and meeting me in the eye for the first time in three days.

“That you’re sorry,” I said. “Because I’m sorry too. I don’t want to fight with you. I don’t want things to be like this. I want you to be my sister again, and my best friend.”

Mia just shook her head. “I don’t want to apologize.”

She was so stubborn. She sounded like a little kids.

“Then I don’t want to talk to you anymore.” I countered. I sat up straighter, trying to put up this brave front. I was not brave. This was scaring the shit out of me.

Mia looked like for a second, she was contemplating it. She really was. But then her entire composure cracked and she looked over at me with half-lidded eyes.

“I’m sorry, too,” she squeaked out, and I nodded. I smiled weakly at her, and then she smiled back.

Everyone was looking at us like we were psychotic. I just blinked a couple time, before looking back over at Mia. She was looking back at me.

“We good?” She asked.

I nodded. “We’re good.”

And then we both smiled simultaneously. I instantly felt better, because I had so much to talk to her about.

The waitress came by shortly, and I just ordered some steamed vegetables and a brown rice pilaf. Kennedy kept on looking at me, like he was nervous or something. Finally, I mouthed a “what?” to him.

He just shook his head, but then he leaned forward. “I’m sorry. I totally forgot that there’s basically nothing for you to eat here.”

I just shook my head. “No, it’s fine. I can eat when I get home.”

Kennedy nodded, though he didn’t look like he liked the sound of that. “If you’re sure.”

“Yup. No harm, no foul.” I smiled at him, and then he smiled back, before leaning over and capturing my lips in his.

He kissed back for a few seconds before pulling away and resting his hand on my face.

“So, tomorrow, I was thinking…” he trailed off, and I nodded for him to continue. “Do you want to come over to my house?”

“Sure.” I nodded. That sounded like a good idea. At least it would give us something to do, and it would mean that I would be with him.”

“You’ll get to meet my mom,” he said. “’Cuz, yeah, I’m nineteen and I live with my mother, whatever.”

I just rolled my eyes at him. “I don’t care if you live with your mom,” I said. “it doesn’t matter to me.”
Kennedy nodded, and then he smiled a little more and squeezed my hand. “Good. So tomorrow it is.”

“Tomorrow it is,” I confirmed.