Tell Me How You Love Me Now

“Kay Leigh! Wakie!” I hear Diane scream as she jumped on my bed

“Argh, Diane, I am still sleeping” I mumble

“It’s twelve noon! I need to eat! I am hungry!” she whined

Oh yeah, shit. Beth and Carl aren’t gonna be back until tomorrow. They’re out for the whole weekend and it’s Sunday today.

“Fine, fine, just give me a second Okay?” I mumble as I try to wake myself up

“Okie! I’ll be downstairs!” she said then I feel the heavy load on my bed subside.

I took a deep breath then slowly sat up. It is late. It’s twelve already. I cannot believe I slept so late last night. I don’t even remember what time it was. All I could remember was Luke was the last one to go and he really was sweet.

“Okay, I have to go now” Luke said then turned back to me

“Aw, Okay.” I say as I feel a little drowsy already

“Take your beauty sleep now” he laughed ruffling my hair

“Whatever! I am not yet sleepy” I mutter as I yawn

“Oh yes you are” he pointed at me

“Fine I am. You can leave if you want”

“Oh, right, about what Jersey asked, what’s your answer to that?” he smiled as he asked

“About what?” I ask confused.

“You know, the whole dating me thing” he said softly

“Oh!” I blushed when I remembered

“Don’t worry, there’s no rush” he said quickly then patted my head

Was he seriously interested in me? I cannot believe this. I smile as I fixed myself up. I was still smiling as I walk out my room. I swear, Luke made me so happy. I realized that Elliot was also going out his room. He turned to me then wore a puzzled face.

“Why are you smiling?” he asked

Oh shit, I was still smiling by myself.

“Uh… nothing” I mumble then walked down stairs

That was embarrassing. I must have looked like a crazy person smiling to myself. I immediately looked for something to cook for uh, lunch since we all totally skipped breakfast already.

“Need some help?” I jumped as I hear Elliot’s voice behind me

“Yea—yeah sure” I answered still a little surprised

“What are you cooking?” he asked as he stood beside me

Why is he being nice again?

“Uh, I honestly don’t know yet. Do you have any suggestions?” I smile to him.

Oh, why did I just smile at him? I never smile when I am around him!

He unexpectedly smiled back then shrugged

“I don’t know as well. Let’s just put all the leftovers together and make something out of it?” he proposed

“Yeah, okay, we can do that” I said as I opened the fridge

“Oh, we still have pasta right there” I hear Elliot say behind me. I jumped a little because he said it so near my ears. His head was so near my shoulders. He was intruding my private space.

“Sorry” he whispered when he felt me jump

“Ahh, right, here, pasta!” I exclaim to cover up the awkward moment

Why do I always have awkward moments with him? When he wasn’t mad at me and I wasn’t pissed at him, we would always have these uncomfortable encounters.

“This is good!” Diane exclaimed as she ate whatever Elliot and I put together.

I actually don’t know what to call it because we just tossed all the leftovers together and we came up with something miraculously edible and delicious.

“All Kay Leigh’s idea” Elliot smiled to me

Okay, this is really weird. Why is he being so nice today? I try to smile back but then the phone rang. I immediately stood up to answer it.

“Hello? James residence” I answer casually

“Hello? Kay Leigh, is that you? It’s dad” I hear a familiar voice in the other end

“Dad! Oh my God you called!” I couldn’t hide my happiness. I haven’t talked to him ever since I got here and I am ecstatic that he found time to finally call me.

“Yes, of course. Sorry I was just able to call now. I should have called a week before—“

“No, No, it’s okay! You can call whenever you want. It just so happens that you were busy with work right? It’s really alright with me” I cut in as I lean against the counter of the kitchen with Elliot and Diane smiling at me

“So, how was your first day? I am sure you like Beth and Carl. They’re a really nice couple right? He asked

“They’re really nice! Actually the first day was really—“

“Oh, sorry Kay Leigh, I have a meeting in ten minutes and I have to prepare for it. My secretary is calling me now. I have to go, I’ll call you when I can” with that, he hung up

I felt a pang of pain in my chest. He didn’t even listen to whatever I was going to say. He didn’t even say goodbye or wait for me to say goodbye to him. I felt that my eyes were moistening. I felt like crying. I slowly put down the phone and bit my lip just so I can stop the tears from falling. I miss mom. Why did she have to die?

“Kay Leigh…” I feel Elliot’s footsteps approaching me slowly then after a few seconds, I felt his hands around my shoulders

“I… I have to go to the bathroom. Just a sec” I mumbled as I quickly exited the room. I couldn’t even face them because I might end up crying in front of them or I might see the sympathy in their eyes. I didn’t want seeing sympathy because it makes me break down and I don’t want that to happen with a PMSing guy and a six year old little girl.

I swiftly rushed to my room and closed the door shut. I had to release this or else I will end up going crazy. I sat on the bed and stared at the wall for a good five minutes until I finally felt the tears coming. I was crying now. I am crying because my dad didn’t have time to even listen to a sentence or two that I’ve got to say to him.

I feel so alone.