Tell Me How You Love Me Now

“I want to” I insisted

“Nope you don’t” he said, distancing away from me

“Tell me why. Tell me why I catch you looking at me at random times in school and why you just snap at me and suddenly become nice the next minute” I find myself asking.

I have been wondering why he was like that ever since I met him and I finally had the guts to ask him

“You really want to know?” he asked, walking straight to me.

It startled me a bit because he is a little to near my face now

“Ye-yeah” I mumble. “Just tell me Ell-“I was cut by his lips pressing on mine.

My eyes grew really big out of pure shock. I don’t know if I should push him away or if I should kiss back. I have never experienced being kissed in this way. Usually I know that the person was gonna kiss me. I had no clue this time. Good thing he pulled away after a few seconds. I stare at him still with wide eyes.

“What… what was that?” I ask still stunned

He snapped out of his daze at me and shook his head

“Nothing… nothing. Forget about it.” He said turning red and then immediately turning around

“Elliot!’ I called out but he was up the stairs already

I was left standing in the living room in confusion. Why did he just kiss me and why did he tell me to just forget about it the second we pulled apart? He is really confusing me now.

All I thought about that night was that kiss. After thinking about it again and again, I realized that I didn’t just feel shock. I clearly remember feeling a shiver go throughout my body when our lips connected. I felt like I was going to faint. It was like I was running out of breath just by a peck he has given me. It felt different. I can’t explain the feeling. I also remember thinking at the back of my mind to kiss back and make the kiss last longer but I never really followed it. The shock I felt didn’t help with the way I was thinking.

Did I really want to kiss him back?

I grudgingly woke up the next morning. I didn’t exactly get enough sleep because I was too busy thinking about the ambush kiss I got last night.

I slowly go down the stairs, trying to avoid bumping into unexpected people that I wouldn’t want to bump into today but of course, I have never been a lucky person. I bumped into Elliot the second I exited my room.

“Oh, uhm, sorry” I mumble, avoiding eye contact

“Yeah sure” he said and it was obvious that he was looking at me “I’ll go down now” he said and then went straight down the stairs

I have a feeling this day will be one long and awkward day.

The car ride has been a proof to that theory of mine. I didn’t talk, he didn’t utter a single word. How long will this go on? I mean, it’s obvious that we can’t continue with this awkwardness for long. We live together and we have classes together. Cassadee and the others will surely notice it bearing in mind that Elliot and I have been talking often these past few days.

“Hey” I hear Alex greet me while I get some books from my locker

“Hi” I smile to him

“So, have you answered Luke?” he asked

“Hmm, well, not yet. Anyway, why are you asking?”

“Just wanna know. I wanna be the first person to know when you have boyfriend already since I was the first person you knew around here. Remember starbucks? If Cass is your girl best friend here, I am your guy best friend” he said

“Right. Okay then. I’ll tell you the second I am not single anymore alright? See you around best friend” I said and patted his shoulders

“Fine be that way” he shouted after me

Elliot’s P.O.V

“Hey man” I said seeing Alex standing on the hallway

“Man, you seriously need to tell Kay how you feel. She is so close to answering Luke” was all he said

“And… how do I feel about her?” I lied

“Come on dude. I know you like her. Just go for it and ask her out!”

“I don’t know what you are talking about” I say, walking away from him.

I don’t even know why Alex knows that I am attracted to Kay Leigh. He is the only one who notices it. The others look like they are clueless. I still feel like an idiot for kissing her last night. I guess I was just caught up in the moment. I am such a coward. I know I feel something special for her but I just can’t step up and tell her. I am scared she’d reject me. I mean, it’s obvious that she likes Luke. She didn’t even kiss back last night. That’s a sign for me to just give up.

I have never had a chance with her in the first place.