This is My December

“OH MY GOD!!!! Elli, I am so sorry!!” Lydia shouted, feeling her face flush into an embarrassing shade of red. How could she be so clumsy? She should have known she couldn’t possibly have reached that even if her dear life depended on it!

I should have gave up while I had the chance…

Now here they were. While Elliot valiantly tried to rescue the falling damsel, he ended up cushioning her fall, lying right in front of her.

“Uh, please don’t worry about it, Dee. We’re both okay and that’s what matters.” Elliot tried comforting her, but poor Lydia just fell deeper into the depths of despair.

“No, it’s not! I fell right on top of you! You must have broken something! God I am such a klutz…” she moaned, laying her depressed head into his shoulder and snapping her eyes shut.

Why did god have to bestow such clumsiness? Out of everything her could have possibly given her, she had to receive that terrible trait.

And maybe it was just her imagination, but as she laid her humiliated red head on Elliot’s shoulder, she swore she felt his muscles tense. Why would he do that? Unless…

NO! I’m invading his personal space! WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH ME?! She snapped her head up, forcing her eyes open.

“Oh, crap! Sorry again, Elli!! I…” Then suddenly all words failed her. No other intelligent thought ran through her mind.

Her golden irises locked onto his amazing green orbs. She thought his eyes were brilliant before, but now… under the warm light of the fireplace his eyes seemed to pierce right into her heart.

His dark locks slightly fell into his face, framing a perfectly oval canvas. His face was rosy red, probably due to the heat that radiated from the fireplace.

She always found Elliot not bad looking, but now… she never realized how handsome he truly was. Maybe if she was not always picking a fight with him every single moment of the day, she may have had actually noticed!

Elliot’s countenance also seemed somewhat shocked, seeming very much in dazed as he stared right back at her. He tenderly pushed a wild strand of her red locks behind her ear, causing her to shudder involuntarily. This fleeting moment of contact sent a jolt from her ear, causing her skin to become all tingly.

After their long staring match, Elliot cleared his throat, breaking his gaze from her eyes. “Um, maybe you should get off of me, Lydia.”

“Huh?” she stupidly blurted out. Realizing that she was still lying on top of him, she yelped, her face blushing a beet red. “I AM SO SORRY! I AM SO SORRY! I AM SO SORRY!” She quickly sprang up, offering her hand to assist him erect.

“Jeez, Dee, calm down. Don’t have a brain hemorrhage over it.” He said, taking her hand as he helped himself up. “But, thanks for helping me up.”

“Yeah, don’t mention it,” she replied, feeling Elliot’s hands escape from her grip.

She inwardly cursed herself. Since when was it so warm? She did not even want to let go…

She shook her head of the thought, dropping her gaze to the floor. An extremely awkward silence filled the air. She naturally squirmed in her place as Elliot turned his head towards the burning flames.

Poor Lydia was sick of silence. This whole day was filled with such quiet moments that it nearly drove her insane! She needed to break the silence… but she was not necessarily willing to do it.

Lydia slowly glimpsed at Elliot, gauging his current emotional state. To think, if she did not, she would not have noticed such an unusual sight.

“Hey, Elliot, what’s that?” Lydia asked. Elliot furrowed his eyebrows in good to honest confusion. The redhead groaned, pointing her finger towards Elliot’s head. “That green thing on your head. What is that?”

“My head?” Elliot repeated, slowly reaching for his head, lifting off a tiny green branch from his dark locks. “Oh is this what you were talking about?”

Lydia nodded her head, analyzing the strange oddity that had lay within his hair’s curly depths. “Yeah… it kind of looks familiar, doesn’t it?”

Elliot nodded his head on agreement, his green eyes narrowed in concentration. Then suddenly realization struck.

“You don’t think…?” Lydia began.

“That this is…” the dark haired boy added, allowing the sentence to trail off.

There really was no need to finish it. They were thinking the exact same thing. Both of their head snapped upwards, towards the tree’s star. “How did this happen?”

The tiny girl soon pointed out, “Well I did have a lot of trouble putting the stupid star on the tree. Maybe I somehow knocked it off…. Oops?”

“Oops indeed.” Elliot said bluntly without any regards for her feelings, gazing inquisitively at the green holly.

Realizing his verbal blunder, he glanced over to poor Lydia, who looked as if she was going to break down and cry. Tiny droplets flooded into her amber orbs, causing him to regret his callous choice of words. “All I meant to say that it was only a matter of time until it fell off. You shouldn’t feel too badly about it.”

Lydia relaxed, releasing a relieved exhale. “Oof! Thank god! I thought I caused another catastrophe!”

“Well considering you are a walking disaster, this is nothing.” Elliot pointed out, and Lydia counted with a withering glare.

A thought soon ran into both their minds. Lydia’s heated leer softened, glancing back to the mistletoe. Elliot also did the same.

“H…Hey, Elli? D…Does that mean what I think it means?” Lydia tentatively asked, shakily pointing her finger towards the green holly branch.

“…I think so…” Elliot muttered under his breath before reverting his gaze to the redhead.

Lydia’s throat ran dry. She did not know what to think, what to do, what to say! Everything came faster than a bolt of lightening, and right now, she was stunned. She barely had time to recollect herself.

Had she ever kissed a boy? Now that she had a time to think about it, her love life was right down pathetic. She never even had a boyfriend, let alone kissed one. How are you even supposed to do it?

Of course, she watched couples do it on several television episodes and romantic films, but never knew of a time when she would confront such a situation in her nineteen years of life…

GOD WHY AM I EVEN THINKING THIS?! she inwardly exclaimed. It was not like he wanted to kiss her… but what did she want to do?

All she could do was babble like the idiot she felt. “Look, Elli, if you don’t want to do it, we don’t have to! There’s no law saying we…”

Then she was silenced by a pair of lips. Her eyelids instinctively slid over her irises.

Lydia finally knew how a girl feels when she received her very first kiss.

Her knees became weak. She felt like she was going to melt into a puddle. She could sense the sparks flying in the atmosphere. All Lydia could possibly feel was Elliot’s warm breath tenderly caressing her cold skin - his lips against her own.

After what she perceived as a beautiful eternity, Elliot parted from Lydia’s surprised lips. As Elliot’s eyes searched her face for some sort of reaction, Lydia could not help, but feel a smile grace her lips.

Just as a matching smile began tugging on his own, his whole expression hardened. The anxious look on her face worried her.

Did I really do that badly? she wanted to ask, but stopped herself. She pushed her petty trepidations aside and tried looking at the situation with some perspective. But after that kiss that’s going to be very hard…

Then before she could ask him any questions, Elliot opened his mouth, “Great. Now it’s my turn to apologize.” Lydia blinked several times, waiting quite patiently as a nervous blush crept onto his features. “Look, I don’t know what happened to me! I am really sorry for that. I am just an idiot. Please don’t take any off…”

Elliot was not given a chance to finish his sentence. Lydia rose to her toes and smashed her lips into his.

Unlike the other one, such sweetness came to a bitter end when the red haired girl slowly parted from him, dazedly processing her whimsical actions. They both dropped their gazes to the ground and slowly raised it to reach other’s surprised eyes.

Another moment went by.

Another silence.

A warm blush crept steadily up each of their pallid cheeks.

“Um, look at the time,” Lydia shakily pointed out, trying to regain the strength in her voice.

“Yeah… we both should get some shut eye,” Elliot added quickly. Lydia nodded her head. “Um, good night.”

“Night.”

On that note, Elliot stormed off, ducking into the hallway that led to his specific quarters. That had left Lydia all there to stand there by herself and her thoughts.

…What just happened? she wondered tiredly to herself, walking unconsciously towards the couch.

Everything just came so fast. Lydia certain what to think anymore. At one moment, I was ready to rip Elliot’s head off, next I was trying to place a star on a tree, and just then I… She suddenly felt warmth in her already red cheeks and ducked her head under the blanket, stifling a loud groan that would have alarmed her benevolent host.

“Maybe if I just get some shut-eye, I’ll be able to get my mind straight the next morning…” she told herself aloud. After a moment of considering that plan, she nodded her head, settling herself deep into her wool covers, clutching the blanket over her beating heart. “This is so weird… my heart is beating so fast. I must be ill…”

What else could have it meant? She surely must be sicker than she originally believed. Right now, her head was spinning…

She concluded she needed rest, and so the fiery female settled herself deep in the sheet’s warmth. Her lids slid over her tired eyes, pulling her deep into the darkness….

~* * *~

No matter how much Elliot wanted to, he could not fall asleep. He tossed and turned in his bed for what seemed to be hours, not at all drawing any nearer to the land of dreams. He later stopped, staring blankly out into the inky darkness that engulfed his room.

Today was completely exhausting and felt he needed to get some rest, but still he could not. How could that be?

Elliot sighed, rolling over to his side. Even though he truly wanted to pretend to be oblivious to the situation, he knew the answer. That’s it. I seriously can’t get any sleep.

He swung his legs over his bed and steadied himself erect. He needed to a drink. Maybe that will calm his spinning head…

As he slowly trekked out from his quarters and down the dark hallway, Elliot’s mind was erratic. He could not even think straight anymore. He tried consecutive times to pacify is roaming head, trying to snap it out of his continual musings. All those attempts… proved to be a recurrent failure.

No matter what I think, he began thinking as he stopped in the middle of the hallway. Everything seems to point to her, the most headstrong female I ever met.

As the fire crackled in its hearth, Lydia lay peacefully on the couch, her chest rising with each breath she took. Every little thought that ran through his mind was about Lydia.

Elliot did not understand why. She was childish, a five-year-old feigning nineteen years. She is stubborn and has a terribly large mouth. Did he forget to say temperamental?

All and all, Elliot found her to be the most irritating girl that will ever appear in his life.

But why did he tolerate her? If he truly found her such a burden, why had he not thrown her out of the house? His did surprise him. He expected to already wrangle her pale neck. Why did he let her stay?

As he walked closer to the sleeping girl, staring down at her peaceful face, he realized he knew the answer. The truth was that he did not think she should stay. It really was that he wanted her to stay.

He did find her to be the most troublesome female he had the displeasure of meeting… but as he got to get to know her, learn more about her, he realized that she may act brashly and stubborn at times, but she usually means very well.

Her ability to speak her mind has greatly assisted him when he needed it most, especially when his mental state was at risk. She can be kind and compassionate under her rough and childish exterior.

Elliot slowly sat down beside her, chuckling to himself.

Who knew such an annoying little twit like her could be such a great help to him?

He slowly gazed at her sleeping face, her cheeks rosy with color and her fiery red hair framing her heart shaped face. He resisted the urge to brush a wild tuft of red locks just so he could enjoy the moment in silence.

Then there was movement.

Elliot had somewhat grew adjusted to such unpredictable antics that he simply looked down, ready to apologize if he had awakened her. Thankfully, her eyelids were still closed tight. Only her body began moving, snuggling closer to him with each passing second.

He raised an eyebrow, not really certain what to make of her unconscious movements.

Then suddenly an arm whipped around him. Elliot would have jumped if it was not for another pale arm preventing him from escape. He tried to shake her off, but the little auburn haired female obliterated all possible hope for release.

Before he knew it, Elliot found himself lying right next to her, her pale arms hugging him close.

As Lydia snuggled closer to the dark haired male, Elliot was not very sure how to react.

He was, for the most part, surprised. Since when is she so strong? He did remember perceiving Lydia as a “weak little twit”. Maybe going on traveling across the country can cause a person to have unbelievable strength…

He tried squirming his way out, trying to wiggle his way towards liberation. Alas, through all the wriggling, writhing, even shaking (the girl more accurately), he proved unsuccessful.

Elliot took a few moments to catch his breath, looking incredulously at the pint-sized shrimp. It is physically impossible for her to be this strong. Her diminutive stature should clearly enforce that thought. What was he going to do?

After staring at Lydia’s angelically sweet and peaceful face, Elliot surmised, …maybe staying here won’t kill me. Not like I have a choice in this matter. He adjusted himself accordingly, looping his arm around her sleeping frame. You sure are a troublesome twerp…

His fingers slowly pushed the stray strand from her pale face.

With the assistance of the fire’s light, her deep red locks seemed to be on fire, creating a blazing halo around her pale features. His fingers traced around the curve of her cheek, down to her chin, and slowly slid up to brush her soft lips…

Then recollection of what seemed like moments before soon entered his mind. His fingers left her countenance and slapped his own face. Oh no… what did I do?

Elliot fell into the dark depths of depression, easily recalling his actions… and replaying that image over and over again. He just could not help himself. As he stared into her golden eyes and those enticing, plump, moist lips…

Oh god, what am I thinking? Elliot placed both of his hands over his face, not even sure what to think anymore. All he knew was that he just did not know what came over him. If he could just turn back time, do things all over again…

Then he dropped his hands. I would still do the same thing…

If he could do everything over again, he would do the exact same thing. His actions would do nothing different. He did not even have any true regrets for it… even though he believed he should.

He rested his head back, diving even deeper into a melancholy sea.

The main question the arose in his head was why. Why would I do everything again?

That question had the same answer as to why he was happy to hear she was to stay. Why he wanted her to stay. Why he was even content that she lied about her sickness. Every question that concerned the nutty redhead had just one answer.

At that moment, he found that central answer.

“I… I love her…” Elliot whispered, barely audible but he did say it. “I really am in love with her.” He lay there, smiling like an idiot, at this very realization.

Then another fact came into his mind, melting that smirk right off his face. He inwardly groaned, returning back into the sea of despair.

He was supposed to be acting like a doctor. Doctors work to treat their patients swiftly of whatever ailment that troubles them. Feelings of all kind are supposed to be kept separate. Doctors are supposed to remain professional.

Not fall in love with their patients! he shouted in his mind. How could I let this happen?

His eyes then widened. Another epiphany came. He was not certain of the time, but he was trying to distance himself from her, trying to prevent such feelings from ever developing.

It was not very hard. Her personality can be fairly repellant and her sickness prevented much action from her part. Deep in his subconscious, any attractions he did feel were not going to develop while he was conscious of it.

Then as the time went by, without his own knowledge, he found himself captivated for her. Slowly, but surely, he was falling for her. He released another sigh.

Who knew love was so complicated? He was not even sure if she cared about him the same way.

Ding!

Another light bulb went off. He remembered Lydia saying she was always on the go. He can tell the circumstances did not matter. She traveled in the cold and collapsed right in front of his sister’s home!

She always traveled around for her dear mother’s sake even before her mini revelation. She had a promise to keep and would do anything to fulfill her promise. Is this situation even different?

Elliot knew the answer. It’s not’ Regardless how she felt about him, he doubted Lydia would stay if she felt any better. But maybe there’s hope…

He quickly reached for the thermometer and placed it into her mouth, all without waking her. He was just lucky Lydia was such a heavy sleeper…

He slid the thermometer out from her mouth, reading the numbers under the firelight. His lips curved into a frown. Her temperature was normal. Lydia is bound to check her own temperature upon her awakening and out the doors before she knew it.

“What am I going to do?”

Elliot just wanted her to be happy. So if she wanted to leave… he will not stop her.

He was a very aware of a saying his mother once told him, ”If you love something, you would let it go. If it comes back, it’s yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.”

Elliot looked back down at Lydia. He knew it was true. It would be selfish of him to let her stay if she truly wanted to go. As long as she was happy, he would be happy.

So, he slowly snuggled closer to her sleeping frame, gently wrapping his arms around her. Elliot wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, immerse himself in her presence.

He slowly allowed his eyelids to close, only wishing to see her when his mind drifted into the world of dreams.

~* * *~

Warmth. All Lydia could feel on her cold flesh was precious warmth. Her head burrowed into the velvet softness, nearly engulfing her in the heat.

Ah! So comfy! I love Elli’s fireplace! she said in her mind, pulling herself closer to the source… I just can’t believe how warm it is…

Then an idea struck her, realizing something quite strange…

She snapped her eyes open, seeing that there was another person lying next to her. BODY HEAT?!

She separated herself quickly, squishing herself as far into the couch as humanly possible. What is going on?

With her breath uneven, she gazed curiously at the young man that lay next to her. Elliot’s face seemed so peaceful as he slept next to her, his warm breath sliding over her like silk. She tentatively poked him in the arm, seeing he was out cold.

She quietly snapped her fingers. Oh yeah! This is kind of similar to when I was little.

Lydia thought Elliot was checking up on her, much like her mother once did when she was merely a child. Whenever her mother went to check on her, she always ended up staying there because Lydia had a habit of sleeping right on top of her, and refusing got get up until the following morning.

Yep, being his whole doctor self, Elli must have been seeing how I was doing, and I inevitably slept on him. Oops?

She relaxed her muscles, easing herself back to her respective place in his arms. His face was rosy, his dark locks slowly falling into his pale lids. Aw! He’s so cute when he sleeps!

The fiery redhead gently placed her head onto his arm, breathing in his scent.

Man! He smells great! It has to be illegal or something…

Her golden eyes meandered down every feature, starting from his closed lids, down his accented nose, finally resting down onto his lips.

And now things just have to get awkward! she slowly separated herself, fighting a bright flush that tried breaking through her features. She scooted as far as humanly possible and thought, I just had to remember that…

It was not like Lydia enjoyed the whole ordeal in any way! Elliot was not even that good looking.

Of course, he did have those scruffy dark locks and those emerald orbs pierced deep into her very soul… but that does not make him even the slightest bit attractive.

…Lie…

Then Lydia firmly settled herself on the topic of the general situation. She did not enjoy a single moment of it! There was not a second of that grueling experience that did she enjoy the way his lips felt on her own, his sweet breath washing over her, the sensations she felt during that very moment…

She slumped back into her spot, grimacing over the general situation.

The truth of the matter was that she did enjoy the kiss. It was the most amazing experience she ever had! She thought she was going to faint the very moment she felt his lips made contact with hers. It was all so breathtaking that she had little time to even recollect herself. She even found his outward appearance more than pleasing to the eye.

Elliot really was gorgeous, certainly very high on the attractive scale… but when did looks mean everything?

Energized by the fact, Lydia straightened her spine and considered his general personality.

There was no way she found him slightly magnetic. His whole being exuded a repugnant sensation. He held the soul of a true sadist, torturing her in every turn and with every word she spoke. He scorned her and deprived her of the thing she had craved - freedom. He even treated her as a mere child.

Just because I’m not going for a medical degree doesn't mean I am entirely illiterate. I HAVE A BRAIN!

Lydia just thought she just did not use it that much.

Well… if I thought so poorly of that impertinent guy, why am I even still here?

All strength slowly vanished from her muscles as she slumped back down into her seat.

She could have left – a long time ago. She did find herself getting remotely better. She was strong enough to go her merry way by herself. Instead, she kept making excuses after excuses to stay.

She needed food and medicine.

She wanted to prove him wrong.

She wanted to hear what his story was.

Did she not want liberation? Lydia even remembered he was willing to let her go free!

And I still declined. What is the matter with me?

She released a low groan, quiet enough not to arouse the sleeping male.

She should have left. She had her mother’s promise to think about right now. She stayed much too long. Even knowing all this, why did she stay?

Then a thought ran through her mind. Something she had not even considered once before in her entire stay with Elliot.

I actually did not want to leave…

This thought was incomprehensible. There was no sense behind such a thing. Had she not established he was a malicious being, intent on inducing her downfall? Did he not annoy the living daylights out of her with his condescending attitude?

Was there even a positive aspect in his personality?

Her mind quickly warped back to several days before.

Elliot had found her, a strange girl, and took her under his care. Most people would have left her die, or at least call the police to inspect a possible homicide/suicide case.

He even tolerated every bit of torment she conjured from her fragile state as he cared for her. Even though she found him overly serious and all around killjoy, he could be fun to talk to and be around.

Elliot was caring and benevolent at times when he wants to be and truly does care for her wellbeing. Lydia was sure he would become a great doctor when he finishes his degree.

Suddenly she released another ragged sigh. Whether Lydia wanted to admit it or not, Elliot did have some good qualities. His general sanity and sternness balanced out her general nutty, nonsensical mind.

Without him… who knows where she would be right now? She would not even be alive let alone be able to come to the outstanding conclusion of her mother’s wish.

Wow… Elli really isn’t an evil sadistic demon from the fiery pits of the underworld! Lydia giggled softly at the thought, her glittery amber eyes traveling back to the dark haired boy’s sleeping visage.

Then all of a sudden, her heart skipped a beat.

What’s this feeling?

Lydia felt it several times before even when Elliot was taking care of her. She just thought it was some weird side effect from her sickness so she never thought much about it. Now that she had some proper perspective, it was so bizarre she felt it now…

Her heart palpitated more rapidly with each thought that ran through her mind.

The reason why I wanted to stay here…

BA-DUMP

The reason why I even made up stupid excuses to stay…

BA-DUMP

The reason why I tolerated being with him…

BA-DUMP

Then Lydia gasped. No way…

She never knew that this feeling was possible, at least for a girl like her. It was just something she saw countless times in movies, but here she was now, her heart beating almost in a inhuman pace.

Lydia finally understood!

“I… actually love him,” she said almost inaudibly, her lips barely moving as she blurted that statement out. “I truly do love him…”

This feeling was so overwhelming… but, she did admit, in a good way. Her heart felt so light, so big, at her epiphany.

“So I guess this is what love feels like,” she wondered aloud, smiling like a silly little moron.

Lydia felt like she was literally floating on a cloud… that is until a thought hit her ten times harder than a wrecking ball.

Lydia inwardly groaned, crashing back down to cruel reality.

So… this is what love feels like… she moaned in her mind. Why, Brain? Why must you ruin my moment of bliss?

She realized that her infatuation would just cause more trouble than good. She already established she could not stay. Even when she was traveling, she never made extremely close relationships with anyone because she knew she would have to leave. It would just cause unnecessary pain to both parties.

Was this situation any different?

Lydia sighed, thinking there was no differences

Besides, why would Elliot want someone like her there with him anyway? No matter how much Lydia desired to remain by his side, she knew he would not want her to stay.

Lydia felt heart, that already swelled so large, suddenly began shattering to so many tiny pieces. What else could she do? Her mother’s final wish was extremely important to her...

Then a strange thought appeared in her mind. Lydia did not recall her mother specifying she had to travel the world to acquire true happiness. Her twisted mind sort of just assumed that as part of her mother’s final wish.

Of course, maybe that may have just been an excuse for her to leave because she was so upset over her mother’s death.

Ugh… there’s just more and more complications! She inwardly groaned. What am I going to do with my sorry self?

Was she to just leave and continue on her journey? Or could she actually…?

Lydia sighed, succumbing to her inner confusion. What was she to do? She had to make the decision now.

Then all of a sudden, her heart spoke to her.

Lydia knew what she had to do.

She wiggled her way off the couch, squeezing passed the dark-haired boy as he slumbered.

You know, I wonder… Am I doing the right thing? the redhead mused, allowing a smile to grace her lips. Heh, I guess my heart won’t steer me towards the wrong path.

She gently placed her lips against his warm cheek and walked away. After all, she needed to get ready for her final ploy – her grand finale…