So This Is Love

Cerise’s POV

I got back to the house after purchasing a package of pregnancy tests; the more the better, I thought. Shayne and Brian weren’t back just yet and Shannon was passed out on the couch just how I liked her, quiet.

I threw my jacket on the bed and slipped my flats of quickly before running into my bathroom and shutting the door. I ripped open the box and proceeded in reading the directions.

Sure, all you really have to do was pee on the damn thing, but I wanted to do this right. No more mistakes.

Pee midstream…wait 90 seconds…disposed of used tests as directed.

Ok simple enough.

I went to the toilet and readied the first test. Good thing I drank all that water, I chuckled to myself.

After I was finished I set the test on the counter near the sink and started counting down on my watch.

After 45 seconds I was going crazy, and I still had another 45 seconds to go.

As the last seconds ticked by my heart began to pound in my chest and I couldn’t hear anything other than it. The loud thumping shook my entire chest and made it hard to swallow.

I million thoughts flashed through my head those last five second.

Would I be a fit mother? How was I going to take care of this baby? Where was I going to get a job at? It had to be some place that would mind me only working for a short amount of time. I’d figured up that I had to be somewhere between a month and two months along; I hadn’t had my period in two but I could have been due to have it later then that anyway.

The most important question though, one I didn’t really have to ask, but at the same time didn’t want to admit; Who was the father? I knew of course who’s it was.

I’d been staying here with Shayne for three months now. The only other guy I’d been with while I was here was Tom and I knew it wasn’t his for two different reasons. One being that he was smarter than Shayne and always wore a condom, and two being that Tom broke up with me about a month before I ended up leaving. It had to be Shayne’s.

It had been about 97 seconds now and the test was ready. I tried wringing my hands out to stop the shaking but it had little effect. I reached forward and grabbed the test pulling into view slowly.

Blue. What does blue mean?

I grabbed the directions again and read through them quickly.

Shit.

“It’s positive.” I whispered to no one but the confines of the small bathroom.

What was I going to do?

I had to tell Shayne. I didn’t want to but he would start getting suspicious if I just starting getting fat and eating everything in the house. Although that would make a great reason to be getting fat.

I shook my head and tried to make a plan.

I’d have to go to the doctor soon. Shayne wouldn’t like that, but he’s been getting better lately. Maybe he won’t freak.

I through the test away and set the other two under the sink. When I stood I turn side ways to look at myself in the mirror. I didn’t look very different. Not yet, at least. I lifted up my shirt a little and gazed down at my bare stomach.

There was a baby in there. My baby.

A smile crept across my lips but then faded as I wondered what all might have happened to it. I was heavily into coke and drinking.

But I’ve slowed down a lot in the last month.

Maybe that was for a reason. Maybe everything would be ok.

I opened the bathroom door and walked into my room to find Shayne laying across my bed in just his jeans. He smiled up at me.

“When did you get in?” I asked.

“About ten minutes ago.” he answered.

He reached up for my hand and pulled me down on top of him and kissed me passionately. After rolling me onto my back he went to work on pulling my shirt off over my head.

“Shayne. Shayne, wait.” I said after my shirt was gone.

“Mmm, what is it baby?”

“That’s just it.” I said flatly.

He looked at me confusedly so I continued.

“Shayne, we need to talk.”