Never ending pain

We just sat there like that for at least thirty minutes. Finally the silence overwhelmed me and I couldn't take it anymore. "Guys don't worry. I'll be fine," I said in an attempt to break the silence. They all came out of their trance like state. I gave an assuring smile and they seemed to look at ease at least. "When are you going?" Aaron asked.
Aaron was the shyest out of our group. He always was reading a book. He had brown hair that was shaggy and brown eyes that were more like a chocolate in the sun. "Monday," I said glad we were actually talking. He breathed in deep and gave a small attempt at a smile.
I grabbed a near-by stick and poked one of the marshmallows from the bag we had by the fire on it. The fire seemed to be crackling more when the marshmallow was engulfed by it. The rest of them did the same. Dylan was the first to pull her marshmallow out of the orange glow of the fire. "Ah!" She screamed. We all laughed at what we saw.
There was Dylan sitting there with the stick still in her hand. But the marshmallow was on her shirt. It was so gooey it stayed there. She frowned looking down at her shirt. "I really liked this shirt too," She said sadly.
The sticky white goo had turned completely solid by now so it was almost impossible to get off. The mint green tank would be lost in the trash by tonight. I slowly pulled my stick out of the fire and blew the fire that was on it out. The slowly as ever I pulled it off and popped it in my mouth. I really wish I didn’t do that.

As quickly as I could I spat the marshmallow out and it landed on the floor. Everyone just looked at me as if I had thee heads. “It was really hot,” I muttered. Somehow they managed to hear it and started laughing their heads off.

I just gave them a glare and they immediately stopped laughing. They all mumbled little sorrys and looked into the fire. I smiled at how I could make them shut up. Then the fire hypnotized me by the flames. Everyone just sat looking into the fire again. I felt a sudden chill and shivered slightly.

“Here,” Cooper took off his beaten up leather jacket and handed it to me. “Thanks,” I mumbled. The need for talk seemed to slip farther and farther away from our group. The only thing that was heard was the slight hoot of a nearby owl. That eventually started to freak me out.

I remembered when we used to come back here two years ago. We were all in the eighth grade and would light a small fire. We would tell scary stories that would make me and Dylan scream whenever we heard a noise. Then we would roast marshmallows and weenies. But tonight didn’t have that type of high spirit in it.

I slid my phone out of my pocket to check the time. 8:13. It was getting darker as the silence continued. Slowly the hooting owl stopped and then it went into complete silence. It scared me. This was the part in the movie when someone would get killed. But this wasn’t a movie this was my life. And I was going to boarding school on Monday.

“Guys its starting to get late I’m gonna go before my dad sees I’m gone,” I said while yawning. They all nodded in response and looked into the fire.

I walked into the darkening woods. I had to feel my way through there. I kept bumping into trees and little rocks on the ground. It all just eventually made me trip and fall. While I was on the ground someone’s hands were around my waist picking me up. I let out a terror filled scream. I didn’t want to get raped…..again.

“Sh, sh Vicky its only me,” Said a gentle voice. As I was about to ask the question a light was shown onto his face. “See?” Cooper said smiling. I nodded and smiled. We started to walk as he held the flashlight out so we could see. We stayed silent until I tripped again.

I let out and “Oomph,” when I hit the ground. “Vicky what are we going to do with you?” He asked me. “Take me in so I don’t have to go to boarding school?” I asked while getting up. He gave me a small sad smile and held my hand to guide me out of here. We finally made it to the end of the woods and just looked at each other in complete silence.

“Well I should go now,” I said in a sad voice. I was about to leave and turn around when Cooper grabbed onto my wrist and spun me around. The next thing he did was very unexpected.

He grabbed onto my chin softly and gave me a kiss. I was shocked at first but then as he went on I started to respond. I slowly slid my hands up to his neck as our lips moved in sync. He hesitantly moved his hands to the small of my back.

That’s when I realized it. I was kissing my best friend. He was practically my brother. We’ve known each other since kindergarten. I slowly pulled away and was immediately hit by a wave of emotion. All of it hit me at once. It was too much. I broke down and cried. Slowly the tears came at first. But then I went into big heavy sobs.

As quickly as that happened I ran away. I already had enough on my mind I didn’t need to think about this now. I ran as fast as I could. My lungs felt as they would of burst. But I kept running. Running right now seemed to take away all the stress and hurt and all my thoughts. The only thing that was in my mind was run.

I finally reached home and climb the rose thing. It was more difficult since it was darker out than before. Finally I made it to the rather small window and peaked in to see if anyone was there. No one was. So I gently climbed in and wiped off any flower petals from the roses off. Slowly I made my way over to my dresser and pulled out a tank and some sweat pants.

I sat on the bed just staring at my purple covered walls. The purple seemed to pull me into some trance. Almost as it was telling me to something. But that was impossible. I quickly shook my head and got under the blankets. They were still soft and smooth. I’ve had them since sixth grade. That’s when my life turned hellish.

That was the year when my dad died. He was always the more caring parent out of them. He would actually give me hugs and talk to me. While my mom just talked to me when necessary. She never really showed true love to me. Even when I was crying at my fathers funeral she stayed in the back and showed no emotions. Then about a year later she met Drew. He was actually rather nice before she married him. He would take me places with her and drive me to my friends houses. But right after she married him he completely changed. At first It was subtle. He would just give me glares that made me uncomfortable. Right when my mother had to go into the hospital for cancer he started doing things to me. He started out with just hitting me whenever I talked back to him. I quickly learned to keep my mouth shut. Then he got a knife one night and sliced my hand up until the dark crimson red poured onto the floor like a waterfall. He kept doing this for at least a month but then he went to other places. He sliced my face then my thighs and then finally my arms. When he was done he would just leave me there not caring if I died or not. After a year of this he moved on from cutting. Those things after cutting scarred me for life.

My life has been pretty much the same since that. Go to school come home and be tortured. But that’s my personal history of torture. But I did have good times when my dad was alive. He would always take me into the woods and show me all the flowers and animals. We would mostly see rabbits and deer. But once when walking we saw a snow white fox dash from one side to the other. It was so beautiful. Then he also showed me his favorite spot back here. It was a grassy area with just a few flowers sprouting and a nice little spring of water by a nearby tree. I loved to go there. Whenever I was stressed or Drew did something to me I would just wonder back to there. It always calmed me down. But now I wouldn’t be able to see it anymore. Now it would be just a vague memory to me.

I rested my head onto my soft pillow and began to do my thinking. Which I often done while I was falling asleep. I went into deep thought of the kiss between Cooper and me. It was the best one ever. He was gentle yet there was passion in it. But I couldn’t have a relationship when I was going to boarding school on Monday. I was going to somewhere else and I really don’t believe in long distance relationships. They never worked in books, movies, or real life. They were just something to brag to your friends about. But there I wouldn’t have any friends. I would more than likely be lonely. A loner walking around the school. No one to call friend or probably even acquaintance.

Just as I was about to slip into unconsciousness I said, “Good night Dad.” In a small voice as always and let my imagination take my mind into dreams.