Where's My Happily Ever After?

“Oh my goodness! Look at you, handsome!”

Melinda was throwing meaningless noises and syllables to her new grandson, but I hardly cared to listen. I followed Monique to find Clarence and left Edwin at the mercy of his mother. He hissed at me to come back, but I had more important things to do than listen to the new mommy complain about motherhood. And yes, I did just call him a woman.

“Why is Avery okay now?” Monique asked me suddenly as we walked down a long hallway whose walls were lined with portraits of people I didn’t know. I did recognize Edwin and his parents, but that was it.

“I’m not entirely sure, love. It’s our first baby, so I don’t think Edwin knows very much about raising a kid. I don’t either, so I’m hoping your granddad can help us out.”

She hushed up, but that didn’t last long as she burst into a humming session and tore her hand from mine to skip ahead. She would look at one portrait on one wall, and then dart to the other wall to look at that portrait. She repeated the process until she tugged me up a flight of stairs. I had no idea where I was going, so I could only pray Monique knew more than me.

“God damn, Jade!” Edwin huffed, suddenly behind me and whispering in my ear. “Why did you make me stay to suffer alone?” I shrugged innocently as Melinda came striding up. She bid me a good day before passing us and leading us down another hall.

“I’m sorry, but I wanted to find out what’s up with our baby. I’m sorry I care.” I stuck my tongue out at him, but I started panting a bit.

I was so out of shape from not walking that I couldn’t even walk a flight of stairs without feeling like I’d just finished running a marathon! Edwin smirked coyly before handing me my baby.

“Hi, little guy—Oh my goodness!” I shrieked as my feet left the floor. Edwin laughed lightly as he held me to his chest. I rolled my eyes and just kept talking to my baby boy. Monique skipped alongside her father and kept trying to peek up at Avery, though she didn’t have much luck.

“Oh, hello, son—oh dear lord! You already had it? But you still have a few months, don’t you?” Clarence stopped dead in his tracks.

“I guess our little tyke had other plans,” Edwin joked, smiling down at me as our baby boy grasped my finger and made noise out of delight. I smiled up at Edwin, giggling.

“He’s so premature, and yet he’s got the Kaiser Death Grip? Oh, just wait until he learns about his amazing Kaiser patented glare!”

I groaned. “Oh, not another.” Edwin glared teasingly at me and I let out a playful shriek before burying my face momentarily into his shirt.

“What brings you here? Or did you just want to show us the little guy then ditch him for Tahiti?”

Edwin didn’t laugh at all, but he didn’t get too rigid. I suppose he couldn’t be mad since he was holding two maniacs who were engaged in a war of making noises. I smiled sheepishly as the infant shrieked “Manshna!”

“Okay, you win,” I murmured, kissing his forehead. I saw Edwin smirk out of the corner of my eye.

“Actually, he is the reason we’re here. We have a few questions.”

“Well, let us go to the den and talk there. If you drop Jade on her head, you’ll be dropping your son on his head, too.”

“I don’t think I could hurt Jade’s brain any more.”

I smacked his chest, but he only laughed as Avery grabbed my cheek and tugged. The whole way down the stairs he refused to let go despite my whining and griping. I’m almost certain I even called him a “No-good, rubber duck squeaking pansy”.

“What is it that you wanted to know?”

“In the hospital he wasn’t moving or breathing or making any noise whatsoever, but the moment the doctor picked him up he started wailing and acting normal. Is that typical?”

A huge grin appeared on his father’s face and I hated to hear the answer if it made him so giddy!