Closer to Heaven With You

“The doctor said it may even take years.” Brian said as he explained to the group about Leigh’s condition. As soon as they’d got back to the apartment everyone had demanded that he tell them all he knew.

“Years?” was the unified cry.

“And it could be completely random. She may wake up tomorrow morning and not remember seeing me or she could remember everything or even just little bits at a time. The doctor said that photos or music can help her.” he explained.

“So we go back to the hospital in the morning and talk to her.” Matt said eagerly.

“We’re going to do more than that.” Brian began. “I’m going to get photos and I’m taking some music – her favourite songs and stuff.”

“Hey, didn’t she keep a memory box?” Jimmy asked.

“Yeah, she did. We’ll take that as well.” Brian replied. The group was silent for a brief moment before Brian spoke again. “Girls, do you know what happened?” he asked turning his gaze between the five girls, who all began to shake their heads.

“She’s been trying to get hold of me, she’d left a voice message on Jimmy’s cell asking him to get me to call her.” Brian said.

“All I know was that she was supposed to be heading to Val’s for the party.” Leana explained and Val began to nod.

“Wait, no, she called me. She was heading to see Michelle first.” She said as everyone turned to face Michelle.

“Babe? Did she come to see you?” Brian asked.

“No, I didn’t see her.” she replied calmly.

“Hang on.” Zack said causing everyone to turn to face him. “Where were you if Leigh was on her way to see you?” he asked. Before Michelle could open her mouth to explain, Val spoke.

“She was in work, working late, again, Leigh said she was heading over to the office to get her, she’d been working late so much and couldn’t miss her birthday.”

“But she obviously didn’t make it to the office, maybe she lost concentration when she was trying to get hold of you guys.” Michelle said solemnly.

“But what was so urgent?” Matt asked.

“Yeah, and she didn’t sound too happy when she left the message on mine.” Jimmy said.
Brian sighed heavily. “I guess only Leigh can tell us.”

A long silence fell over the group that was finally broken again when Brian spoke. “Sorry guys, I’m beat. Let’s meet here in the morning so we can head to see Leigh first thing.” He said, everyone showing their agreement and understanding. Everyone said their goodbyes leaving Brian and Michelle in the apartment, sorting through and searching for music, photos and other items that may jog Leigh’s memory.

*****

Leigh adjusted herself in her hospital bed, trying to find the most comfortable position to sit in. it was a painful task, despite the pain relief she was being fed through an IV drip in her left hand, her ribs, arms and legs still ached with every inch she moved. But she was determined to sit up. It was bad enough that she could barely remember her own name; she wasn’t going to let her body defeat her as well.

Finally, she found a position that was comfortable and allowed her head to fall back against the pillow that was supporting her back and closed her eyes so she could concentrate on remembering. She wasn’t bothered what she remembered as long as she remembered as long as she remembered something, and hopefully before Brian returned.

Doctor Jackson had been happy when he’d come in during his rounds earlier in the morning to see that she’d remembered her visitors name and some of the stuff he’d told her. Now all she wanted to do was remember. She closed her eyes and pictured Brian. His long, jet black hair, his deep chocolate brown eyes, his high cheek bone, the tattoos on his arms. As she pictured him in her mind she tried to keep the sound of his voice and laughter in her head, desperate to remember something more. One word entered her thoughts as she kept his image in front of her. A word that on it’s own made no sense. Gates. Over and over she kept hearing that one word.

“That makes no sense.” She said out loud, opening her eyes at the sound of a quiet tap at the door. The door opened and a nurse entered with a cheerful “Good morning.”

“Hi.” Leigh replied.

“Your brother and his friends are here to see you, do you mind them all coming in at once or will it be too much? There are quite a few of them.” She asked as she checked her charts.

“Brian’s here?” Leigh asked smiling broadly. The nurse looked up at her with a mirrored smile.

“Yes, and about ten others, all eager to see you.”

“Ten people? To see me? I guess you better send them in.” Leigh replied slowly. the nurse nodded and left the room, only to return a few moments later with Brian behind her. Leigh’s smile broadened at the sight of Brian entering the room but then her eyes widened as she turned her attention to the group of people who filtered into the room behind him. he was followed closely by a female and a large male. She watched each of them in turn as they entered the room, taking in their appearance in the hope that she recognised one of them.
No such luck, so she returned her gaze to Brian.

“I take it by that look you don’t remember any of this lot.” Brian said solemnly, pulling the chair to the side of the bed so he could sit.

“Not a clue who they are.” She replied.

“In that case I better introduce them.” He replied with a smile.

Leigh sat quietly as he introduced each of the other people in the room, intently watching each of them as he explained who they were. She only interrupted once, to clarify that the largest male in the room, the very muscular, tattooed, shaven headed man with beautiful hazel eyes he’d referred to as Matt was in fact her boyfriend like he said.

“So what’s all this anyway?” Leigh asked once the introductions were complete, referring to the box he’d carried in and placed on the floor beside the bed.

“Well, after we left here last night, we got to thinking and we got together some of your things; some photos and music and stuff, stuff that means something to you, to try and jog your memory.” Brian explained.

Leigh smiled as she glanced around the group of people surrounding her bed, her eyes quickly landing back on Brian. “So where do we start?” she asked quietly, her voice shaking slightly.

“Well, as much as this is probably going to embarrass me, I thought we should start when we were kids so I found your photo album you put together with pictures from when we were kids.” Brian replied looking through the box and taking out a large cream photo album. “Push that table up for me please Zack.” Brian added. Zack pushed the small table that was at the foot of her bed up the length of her bed for Brian to place the album on.

Brian slowly began to show her the photo album, stopping with each photo and explaining what was happening in them and who was in them. With each new photo that was shown there was always a tiny bit of hope that it would trigger a memory. This hope was quickly followed by disappointment when Leigh began to shake her head.

It took them most of the morning to work their way through the large album. They were forced to stop when Leigh was brought her lunch. The nurse allowed them to stay with her and that she would turn a blind eye if they wanted to get something from the cafeteria and bring it back to the room as long as it wasn’t a hot meal.

“Hey, since when do you eat peas?” Brian asked when he saw Leigh place a fork full into her mouth. Leigh looked up at him with a look of confusion as she chewed her mouthful.

“You’ve blatantly refused to eat peas for eighteen years, any vegetable come to that.” Brian explained. Leigh looked at him, to her peas and back at Brian and shrugged.

“They’re really not all that bad.” She replied taking another fork full. Brian couldn’t help but chuckle as he watched his sister eat.

They then spent the afternoon listening to the music they’d brought in for her as they looked through her memory box. Again, they all watched hopefully as each item, from cinema tickets to pendants, were taken out of the box, waiting for Leigh to recognise one of them or for a memory to be triggered. But there was nothing. For every item that she was shown Leigh looked at it as if she’d never seen it before, she looked up from each object, firstly at her brother and then around her friends with a look of confusion, before one of them would give her an explanation.

With each memory she failed to remember Leigh couldn’t help but notice the looks of disappointment on her friends face, especially on Matt and Brian’s. And she felt the disappointment too. there was nothing more she wanted than to remember something, anything. Just one small memory was all she asked for, all she needed.

Feeling disheartened, Leigh took out a small, blue, simple bracelet out of the box. She looked at it for a brief moment, placing it onto her arm momentarily before taking it off again and throwing it down towards the end of the bed, the metal in the bracelet pinging against the metal frame of the bed.

“Why the fuck can’t I remember?” she yelled angrily, pushing the box off her lap, shocking everyone in the room as Jimmy reacted quickly and grabbed the box before it could fall to the floor.

“Leigh, it’s ok.” Brian said quietly. She looked up quickly to stare at him.

“No, Brian, it’s not! I can’t remember a fucking thing! Nothing. For all I know, all that you’ve told me has been a pack of lies!” she continued to yell.

“Leigh, you’ve got to believe me, please, you-“

“Is everything okay in here?” Brian’s pleads were cut short when the nurse hurried into the room, a worried look on her face.

“Leigh? Are you ok?” the nurse asked as she squeezed past the people in the room to get to her side.

Leigh looked up at her, raising her hand up to wipe her tears. “I’ve had enough for one day.” She murmured quietly. The nurse nodded and turned to face Brian.

“Guys, I’m sorry, but Leigh needs her rest. It’s been a long day for her and she’s getting tired and upset.” She said. Brian wanted to protest, he wanted to stay with his sister, he didn’t have to show her anymore photos; he just wanted to be close to her. But when he looked at her, tired, upset, heartbroken face, he knew that the nurse was right. he nodded silently as he stood up from his chair.

“Night Leigh, I’ll be back in the morning if that’s ok?” he said quietly as he gathered items back into the box.

“Of course that’s ok, Brian, I’m just tired and need some rest, maybe my mind will remember better when I’m not so tired?” she replied, looking up at him with a weak smile.

“Night sis, I love you.” Brian replied, mimicking the smile as he leant towards her and placed a soft kiss on her temple.

“Night Brian. night guys.” She said turning her attention to the rest of the group. They all said their goodbyes and left Leigh alone as the nurse followed after them.

Leigh settled down in her quiet room, tears still forming in her eyes as she tried to get rid of the anger that was still bubbling deep inside of her. she promised herself that she’d remember something and it’d happen soon.