The Night You Took Away a Little More Than Just My Breath

“What the fuck.” I muttered as I woke up with half my body hanging off my bed in complete darkness. I looked around and saw a small light on my floor. I rubbed my eyes and got up to look at it. It was my phone that I threw on the floor after texting Taylor. I opened it up, nothing. No missed calls, no texts in my inbox. I sighed and threw my phone back on my bed after looking at the time. 8:34 pm.

My house was completely silent as I opened my bedroom door and stepped out into the hallway. I made my way down the steps and walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water. I glanced at the counter as I walked by and saw a little note. “John, your father and I went out to dinner and Jamie is with friends. She should be home before us.” I read it aloud and smiled. “Great. I have the whole house to myself for a while.”

I poured myself a glass of water and walked over to the couch, sitting down and propping my feet up on the coffee table. I leaned back and closed my eyes, betting myself that Taylor was with that guy this exact moment. I took a sip of my water and rolled my eyes. Looking down at my glass, I decided I needed something stronger. A lot stronger.

I made my way into the kitchen, pouring my water out and sitting the glass in the sink. I reached up into the cabinet and found one of my dads shot glasses and bottle of whiskey. I poured the alcohol into the glass and put the bottle back in the cabinet. I held the full shot glass up to my nose and inhaled the strong scent. I closed my eyes and took the shot as quick as I could. I winced as the hot liquid burned my dry throat. “Ugh.” I groaned and sat the shot glass in the sink, wiping my mouth.

The whiskey still lingered in my throat as I saw a pair of headlights pull into my driveway. I peered through the window as the headlights dim and saw Jamie getting out of her car. She giggled as I heard another voice behind her. “Who is she bringing over now.” I muttered as I opened up the fridge.

I took a coke out and opened the can, taking big gulps to wash away the lingering taste burning my throat and making its way down to my chest. I heard keys jingling and the doorknob turning. I washed the shot glass out and put it back in the cabinet as I heard Jamie walk in.

“Oh, john.” She sounded surprised. “I didn’t think you’d be here.”

“Yup.” I said, clearing my throat as the burning whiskey hit my chest. I turned around from the sink and saw a tall, skinny guy standing behind her with a bag in his hands. “What’s this?” I asked, looking him up and down.

“Uh, oh…” She looked back at him with a grin. “This is Eric.”

“Eric…” I said. The name was on the tip of my tongue as I tried to remember where I heard it before.

“Eric, this is Johno. My step-brother.” She said.

“Hey, Johno.” He said, stepping inside the house a bit more.

“Oh, sorry.” Jamie said, realizing she was keeping him in the doorway. “Make yourself at home.”

I leaned against the counter and watched as Eric looked around the house. “Very nice place.” He said. “Totally different from your old house.”

“Yeah, I like it better.” She grinned, walking toward the steps. “You want to come up to my room and set your bag down?”

“Of course.” He smirked, following her up the steps and smacked her ass as she was walking in front of him.

Eric. Eric… I thought, staring up at the ceiling. “Oh!” I gasped aloud. Eric was her ex boyfriend that she broke up with a little before we met. The reason they broke up, I don’t know. She might have told me before, but I don’t remember.

I pictured him as a shorter guy, maybe around her height and a bit muscular. Instead he was tall and skinny, close to my body frame with green eyes and light brown skater kid hair, I guess you’d call it. From upstairs I hear Jamie giggle again, and I rolled my eyes.

“Stop it!” She yelled, jokingly as I heard him moan.

“I missed you so much, Jamie.” He mumbled.

I sighed as I listened to them joke around up in her room. I looked around the kitchen and living room that had yet to start spinning around me. “One more shot, I’ll be fine.” I said to myself as I opened the cabinet again. I poured myself another lonely shot, and quickly swallowed the substance. Grabbing the can of coke almost immediately after I put the shot glass down, I took a few more gulps of soda.

I left the whiskey and shot glass out on the counter and made my way towards the steps, then back up to my room. I licked my alcohol stained lips and picked up my phone. I looked at my inbox and there was still no sign of Taylor. I decided to turn off my phone and sat it on my dresser.

“Are you okay tonight?” Jamie said in the doorway.

“Nope.” I said, still looking down at my phone and then walking over to my window.

“Well, what’s wrong babe?” She said, walking in my room and shutting the door behind her.

“Taylor.” I said, turning around to her standing right behind me. She placed both of her hands on my hips and stood on her tip toes to kiss my neck. I turned away. “Don’t.” I said. She didn’t move. She still stood on her tip toes and looked at me, our faces so close together.

“Have you been drinking?” She asked.

“Yes.” I said. “Though I’m not drunk.”

“Will you tell me what happened?” She asked, running her hand through my hair. Relaxed, I threw my head back and enjoyed the sensation of her soft fingers move through my tangled hair.

“Later.” I said, stepping back a little. “Go back and be with your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my boyfriend anymore.” She said.

“Anymore…” I replied. “Though you still have feelings for him. Remember, I read your diary.” I heard Jamie sigh. I couldn’t see her expression because it was so dark in my room. But from what I sensed, it wasn’t pretty.

“Why are you so hard headed.” She stated.

“Why are you still here.” I said. “Go back with him, he’ll get suspicious.”

“Why would he get suspicious?” She asked. “He doesn’t know anything.”

I groaned. “Can you just leave me alone.” I said. “For now. Come back when I’m ready to talk about it.”

“Not when you’re drunk, John.” She said. “I’d rather talk to you when you’re sober.”

“I’m just buzzed now. I’m fine.”

“Don’t drink anymore tonight.” She said. “It won’t solve anything. It may make things worse.” I heard her walk towards my door and saw her leave, going back into her room.

I chuckled and walked towards my door that she didn’t close. I went back down to the kitchen and grabbed the bottle of whiskey, leaving the shot glass behind and walking back up to my room. “Don’t drink anymore tonight.” I mocked Jamie. “It’ll only make this worse.” I said, taking a huge gulp of whiskey right out of the bottle and laying on my bed. “Yeah… right.” I sighed, closing my eyes.

“Is your brother alright?” I heard Eric ask.

“He’s fine. He’s just having some girl problems…”

“I know how that feels.” He chuckled.

“Shut up.” I heard Jamie laugh. “You’re the one that hurt me.”

“Yeah, but let’s forget about that.” He said as I heard him give her a kiss. “Let’s remember tonight.”

“Mm, no.” Jamie moaned. “Not right now, okay?”

“Okay.” Eric said in a sad tone.

I picked up the half empty whiskey bottle and placed it to my lips again, taking two more drinks and sat it back down on my nightstand. “That should do it…” I said, fumbling to try and put the top back on.

I sat back and laughed at myself, getting drunk all alone and sulking over a girl. Two girls, actually. What was Jamie up to, bringing Eric over my house? And why did Taylor also get involved with another guy in the same day? Just then, I realized their plan didn’t work out so well. I heard their phone conversation. I knew what they were up to.

I got up and walked to Jamie’s room, walking in on her and Eric making out on her bed. She was laying on top of him, her hands up his shirt and his hands cupping her breasts. “Jamie, let’s talk.” I stated.

She jumped up and got off Eric, hoping I didn’t see anything. “You-you want to talk right now?”

“Yes.” I said, turning toward my room. “Come with me.”

“Hold on, Eric.” She said. I heard him smack her ass again as I walked into my room, turning on the light.

“Sit down.” I told her as she walked by me, into my room. I shut my door and she sat on my bed. “Tell me what you’re up to.” I said, laying on my bed next to her.

“John.” She sighed, getting up and taking the bottle of whiskey off my nightstand. “Don’t do this to yourself.”

“Why are you doing this to me.” I said, sitting up staring into her eyes.

“Doing what?”

“This.” I said. “Why is Eric over here?”

“Because, he called me and wanted to catch up.”

“Hmm, and why is Taylor with that other guy right now?”

“I don’t know…” She said. “John, what are you talking about? I don’t even talk to her…”

“Don’t lie to me, girl.”

“John, you’re drunk.” She said. “I told you to stop drinking.”

“I’m not drunk yet, I told you this.” I said, putting my hand on her leg and scooting closer to her. “Tell me about your little plan with Taylor. And don’t try to lie. I heard you guys on the phone this morning.”

Jamie looked up at my ceiling and sighed. “Where do I start…” she said, falling back on my bed, holding the bottle of whiskey on her stomach. I reached over and grabbed the bottle, taking another drink. “Okay, Taylor and I decided that it’d be best for you to stop messing around with both of us. To be honest, you were leading her on and you actually liked me, which is wrong because I’m your sister.”

“Step.” I said. “And you like me too. Face it, don’t blame it all on me.”

“But listen.” She said. “I looked through your phone and got her number-”

“But before all of this happened, not once did either of you two stop and think about how I’d feel?”

“…no.” She said. “And now I feel horrible seeing you like this.”

“You two are stupid.” I said. “I was already done with you, and now I’m done with her.”

“Johno, if it makes you feel any better I really don’t like Eric anymore. He’s not the same.”

“Stop lying to yourself.” I said as she sat up.

“Give me this…” She said, grabbing the bottle out of my hand and taking a swig.

“Go ahead, finish it off.” I said, seeing that there was only about four more shots out of it. I already had about six or seven, and I was starting to feel the effects.

I sat there, watching Jamie finish off the bottle. She groaned as her throat began to burn and the taste began to linger. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.” I said. “What about Taylor? Is she really with that Kyle guy?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“Whatever.” I said, getting up. “I’m done with her now too.” I grabbed my phone off my dresser and turned it back on. Without thinking, I texted her and simply said ‘We’re Done.’

“Are you gonna be okay?” Jamie asked.

“I guess, yeah.” I said as she walked over to me, leaving the empty bottle on my bed.

“Whew, that whiskey really is strong.” She giggled, falling into me. “I’m already a bit tipsy.”

“Don’t let him take advantage of you.” I said, holding her close to me. “I’ll always be here for you no matter how shitty you treat me.”

“Thanks, but I don’t treat you like shit.” She said. “You should know you’re the one person in this world I trust the most. I don’t know what was going on in my mind this morning when I fucked with your feelings.”

“You’re just sorry I found out.” I smirked. “So say I didn’t figure out this little plan… what would you have done with Eric?”

“I- I can’t bring myself to say it.”

“Fuck him while I was in the other room so I could hear it?” I said, looking down at her as her waist was pressed against mine. “I hear everything, you know. These walls are paper thin.”

“Why would you think that?”

“Because its true. He was planning on staying the night, he had all his stuff in that bag.” I chuckled. “How could you disrespect yourself and just sleep around like that?”

“I wouldn’t call that ‘sleeping around’.” She said. “I actually know and care for him, even if we did loose touch.”

“But sleeping with him would just lead him on.”

“Like how you led Taylor on?” She said.

“I did not lead her on. I led myself on, taking too long to figure out my feelings.”

She pressed her chest against mine as we leaned against my dresser. “Shh.” She said, putting her soft warm finger against my wet lips. I grinned and looked down at her before she moved her face closer to mine. She kissed her finger that separated our lips and walked out of my room quietly.

Confused, I sat back on my bed and listened closely as she talked to Eric. “My parents just called Johno, and said that he better not have any friends over. He told them that you were over, and they said that you couldn’t stay either. They’re on their way home right now.”

“But, I thought you said they were alright with it.” He said.

“I guess they changed their minds…” She said.

“Aw, well some other time?” I heard him say.

“Yeah, we’ll figure something out.” Jamie said to him as I heard them walk towards her door.

“Okay, it was really nice seeing you again babe. It brought back so many feelings and memories.” Eric told her as they passed my bedroom door and down the steps.

“Poor guy.” I muttered as I turned around and opened a dresser drawer. I pulled out some boxers and decided to change the clothes that I’ve been wearing all day long. I took off my baseball tee and basketball shorts, letting them fall to the ground as I put on a new pair of boxers. Bending over to pick the dirty clothes up, I got a bit dizzy as the alcohol began to kick in some more.

I stood back up, almost falling backwards. I turned off my light, watching my room become completely dark again. I decided to walk downstairs to find Jamie. Gripping onto the wall as much as I could, I made my way down the steps without falling. I walked into the living room just as she was shutting the door behind Eric. She turned around at me stumbling toward her and giggled.

“Jamie. I’m such a lightweight.”

“It’s because you’re so skinny.” She said, putting a hand on my waist and letting it fall down towards my crotch.

“Hmm.” I moaned. “If you know what you’re doing you’d stop right now.” I looked down at her.

“I know what I’m doing.” She said. “I don’t wanna stop.”

“Why is that?” I smirked.

“I want you.”

“We can’t do this.”

“Not right here…” She winked, which made my drunken, sensitive heart melt. She took my cold thin hand and led me back up the stairs, back into my dark room. “Lay down.” She smirked as she pulled my blankets back and got in my bed.

I stood by my bed and looked over her. “Jamie, think about what you’re doing.”

“John.” She sighed. “I’m not drunk. Not even as tipsy as you are. If I were completely sober I’d want to do this too. I want you so bad.”

“You want me so bad, huh?” I grinned, leaning over the bed with my hands on each side of her.

“Yes.” She said, leaning up to kiss me. I pulled away and heard her pout. “What’s wrong?”

“I forgot to lock the door.” I said, walking over to my door and locking it. I walked back over to the foot of my bed and began to crawl on top her, with only the thick blanket separating our bodies. I pressed my hips hard into hers as I leaned down and kissed her neck.

“John,” She whispered as I began kissing her collar bone. “Come closer.” She said.

I got up and slipped under the blanket, laying on the left side of her. I ran my hand over her clothed body and began to kiss her cheek as she slipped out of her jeans. My hand made its way to her waist and I slipped a few fingers beneath the strings of her thong, tugging it down a little. She took my hand and moved it up to her chest, making me cup her breast.

With one of my hands on her chest and the other on the bed to hold myself up, I got back on top of her and leaned down to kiss her soft lips. She moaned into my gentle kiss as she trailed her fingers down my bare back. I moved my hand down to her waist, and up her shirt as she helped me take it off. I grinned and leaned down to kiss her neck some more as she started to grind her hips against mine. “Oh,” I moaned. “Jamie…” I giggled.

I closed my eyes and threw my head back as she placed her hands on each side of my waist and continued to grind against me. I opened my eyes again, instantly feeling dizzy from the alcohol and almost falling over. She wrapped her legs around me and pulled me closer to her. My chest was now pressed against hers and my face was buried in her neck. She ran her fingers through my hair as I pressed my hips against hers harder.

She managed to roll on top of me, sitting on my legs as I laid in front of her. She took off her bra, throwing it on the floor beside my bed. I sat up, with my face directly across from her rising and falling gentle chest. I kissed her collar bone once more and both of my hands explored her body. I reached down and slipped my curious hand into her panties, but paused. “If we’re going to do this again, can we at least do it right?”

“What do you mean?” She stopped.

“Lay down.” I said, speaking past the alcohol. “I just want to hold you.”