Ashes and Wine

[&~&]

That Monday I awoke to the sounds of rustling in the kitchen, something falling, and some mumbled profanities. I laughed and got out of bed to make my way into the bathroom for my morning rituals. These days, things have been routine, which is pretty rare considering both of my parents have left me at some point in time. The only difference is my dad came back.
I headed down stairs for a quick bite to eat. As I made my way to the pantry, I kissed my father’s rough cheek. “Morning, Daddy.”

I began my search for some cereal as he said, “Good morning, Princess.”

Shortly after I placed my bowl in the sink, a car sounded outside of the house. “Have fun! Stay out of trouble! See you in a week!” He called from somewhere upstairs, presumably getting dressed for another day at the office.

[&~&]

There she goes. I hate that lucky bastard in the front seat. He has her all to himself, but I’ll get her soon. Someday soon, that girl will be mine and he will be out of the picture.

[&Nick&]

She was like silk this morning. I wanted to run my fingers through her shining hair. I wanted to place my hand on top of her manicured one and brush my thumb across her sun kissed wrist. I wanted to rest my palm on her toned thigh and have her smile at the gesture. I wanted to feel her perfectly sculpted lips on mine. Wanted is the key word here, but I knew as well as Sophie that I would never have the balls to even suggest the word ‘us’ to Ella.

She was reclining back in the leather passenger seat of my vintage convertible. Her sunglasses covered her ice blue eyes and her brown hair blew free behind her. Her legs looked a mile long in those cutoff jean shorts with her white tipped toe nails up on the dashboard. Her bikini top was vaguely showing through her thin white t-shirt, as well as her belly button ring Sophie begged her to get because she was too scared to get one by herself. I could hardly keep my eyes on the road. I knew this wasn’t the real her, but I’m not really complaining about what Sophie molds her into, as long as she stayed her beautiful self. “Hey, Nick, can you turn on the radio for me?”

Without a response I turned it on to her favorite station: 97.5. It was currently playing a commercial about some car dealership and she looked at me before laughing her melodic laugh. “What?”

She just shook her head, still smiling as a song came on. “Ah! This song is so old. I love it.”
I didn’t recognize it, but it sounded familiar. She started singing a little bit later. “But, you see the colors in me like no one else. And behind your dark glasses you’re... You’re something else. You’re really lovely, underneath it all. You want to love me, underneath it all. I’m really lucky, underneath it all. You’re really lovely…”

Stopping, she looked over at me. I was struggling to not meet her gaze as she reached over and started to twirl my hair between her fingers. I could feel goose bumps on my neck rise in ecstasy. “I love your hair, Nick.”

The way she subconsciously flirted with me made me want to scream. But hell, what guy wouldn’t take what he could get?

[&Ella&]

We drove about an hour before arriving at Leila’s cabin. It was a tradition to come up here every spring break and relax before school started up again. And since this was our last year as high schoolers, every one’s parents agreed to let us go alone. Besides Leila, Nick, and me, Leila’s boyfriend Sam was coming up too. Sam was an OK guy from what I have seen of him. He’s cute, I’ll give him that, but sometimes I worry. Leila hasn’t had the best past regarding boyfriends. And when I say that, I mean things were pretty tragic two years ago. Her latest ‘boyfriend’ at the time had always rubbed me the wrong way, and after the incident I seriously hated myself for not saying anything. Let’s just say it took her a good year to come close to trusting another guy.

Sam and Leila weren’t here yet, so Nick and I just relaxed in his car considering we didn’t have the key to the house. I scooted over and rested my head in the crook of his neck, trying to get comfortable. Knowing Leila and her awesome bladder holding abilities they probably wouldn’t be here for another twenty minutes. His arm went around my back and his hand found my arm. His textured thumb drew a line across my skin as he leaned against his door. My eyes were closed from the blinding sun, and I’m sure his were too.

I could sit here forever.

He chuckled quietly while resting his cheek on my head. “You know, I’m glad I get you all to myself this week.”

A shiver rippled up my spine from the chilled wind that hadn’t quiet left with winter...I think. Nick pulled me closer and wrapped his other warm arm around mine before I spoke. “Two things. One, how come? And two, why are you so warm all the time? That pisses me off that guys are so much hotter than girls.”

He laughed. “One, because you can’t go to any clubs. And two, I beg to differ.”

Rolling my eyes behind their lids, I laughed. “Whatever, Mr. I Can Get Any Girl in School.”

“Look who’s talking, Miss I Can Get Guys Twice My Age to Risk Becoming a Registered Pedophile Just so They Can Sleep with Me.”

I sat up and stared at him with wide eyes and an open mouth. “You take that back! I’m old enough to sleep with those men if I wanted to!”

He shot me an amused expression. “Do you?”

I slapped his chest. “No!”

“Hey, hey, hey! I was just kidding! Come here, you’re getting goose bumps and I’m so much hotter than you.”

“No, I’d rather freeze.”

Regardless, he pulled me on top of him then flipped our positions. Next thing I knew, I was laughing hysterically and trying to squirm away from him.

“Ella!” I sat up still laughing as I saw Leila’s body half out the sun roof while Sam tried to pull her back inside the car.

“You have some weird friends.”

I slipped away from Nick and jumped out of the convertible. I waited for Leila to get out of the car before pulling her into a hug. “Hey! How are you?”

She smiled wide and looked back at Sam who was pulling her suitcases out of the trunk. “I’m fantastic. How are you? Don’t think I didn’t see what you guys were doing…” She raised her eyebrows as she looked behind me at Nick. I also looked back to see that he was doing the same as Sam.

“I… no, it’s not like that,” I laughed nervously before continuing. “He was-”

She cut me off quickly, “I don’t want to know what he was doing sweetie. Come on, let’s go inside.”

The cabin was like a comfortably small one story, two bedroom, and one bath house. I always sleep with Nick since we do that every weekend anyway. Sleep in the same bed, that is. And Leila is with Sam, obviously.

We walked inside to find it looked exactly the same. All the decorations scattered across the walls, hard wood floors under our feet and a roof over our heads. A bed room was on either side of the front door, and a kitchen and living room straight ahead. Beyond the sliding glass patio door was my haven; the hot tub. I ran through the living room and to the glass door, tugging it open to get the hot tub warm enough for tonight. Afterwards Leila and I left to go get groceries while the boys unpacked.

[&Nick&]

I set both suitcases on the floor next to the queen sized bed. Leila and Sam get the two twin beds, while Ella and I get the queen size bed since we’re friends. We won’t do anything wrong. We’ve known each other too long to do anything promiscuous. Well, maybe we will. Maybe she wants me just as much as I want her. Maybe... maybe I’m a pansy who can’t even admit my feelings to the girl I love…

I was pretty much done unpacking after a good twenty minutes. I walked out to the living room to see if anything was on TV until Ella got back. Sam was sitting on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees, fingers laced. He was staring at me as I walked in. It was slightly creepy, I have to admit, but I grabbed the remote and sat down as if he wasn’t here. He cleared his throat and if it were possible he would be burning a hole through my head. I looked over and pulled my eyebrows together. Why is he shooting me death glares when I don’t even know him? Freak. I turned back towards the TV and tried to focus on some MTV reality show. “So, you and Ella, huh?”

I looked at him again, his gaze still held the same hatred as before, but he was now looking at the television. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He nodded slowly. A funny glazed look came into his eyes. “I think you do. I don’t blame you for going for her either. I’d tap that in a second. Hell, maybe I will. She’s hot as fu-”

“Dude! Stop talking like that! You have a freaking girlfriend who just so happens to be her good friend!”

He laughed hard and leaned back against the couch. “Sure, man. Whatever.”

And after that it was silent until the girls came back. Neither of us moved or even bothered to
change the channel when Flavor of Love came on. The car door slammed shut and Sam stood up, walking over to me in two strides. He picked me up by my collar, we were face to face. “Keep your mouth shut, and everyone walks out of here alive.”

And with that, he walked out the door.

What. The. Fuck.

[&Ella&]

“No way!”

“Swear to God!” I laughed and grabbed a couple bags of groceries. Turning, I ran into someone and he grabbed my arms to steady me. I looked up and he didn’t let go, so I tried to pull away. He released me hesitantly and mumbled a “sorry” before stepping around me. He spun Leila around and kissed her, his eyes on me the whole time. Shaking my head I headed inside.

Later that night, after dinner I got in the hot tub to clear my head after the days weird events. Dinner was no different from the grocery incident. Sam kept looking at me throughout the whole meal, his gaze the same giving off the same burning feeling they gave me outside. There was something seriously off about him. It kept reminding me about last time I had this feeling. That stupid saying “history repeats itself” wouldn’t leave my mind.
Even Nick was acting strange. Every time I looked at him, his eyes were glued to his food that was barely touched. I tried to get him to look at me by grabbing his hand under the table, but he didn’t. He just squeezed back gently before he started to play with my fingers.
This whole vacation was starting to scare me. I came to relax and have a good time with my two best friends, but because Leila had decided to bring Sam something seemed really… off.

I heard the sliding glass door open and close behind me; I stiffened. That better not be Sa-.
Nick soundlessly slipped in the seat right next to me. I looked up at him to see his gaze was soft and caring. I smiled and leaned back against the tub wall, still holding his gaze. It was silent for a minute. “Ella,” he asked softly.

“Hmm?” He looked down at the bubbling water and shrugged.

What is wrong with him lately? “Nick, you can tell me anything.” I placed a hand on his shoulder and he shivered slightly. What the hell? Were in a 102 degree tub and he shivers? He blushed and shrugged my hand off him.

“Nick, what’s wrong?”

He looked at me, then back down at the bubbles again. “Has,” he stopped and tried again. “Did Sam say or do anything to you today?”

“Not really, no. Why do you ask?”

“I, um,” he paused for a second and searched the woods for an answer. “I was just wondering. The guy kind of creeps me out.”

“You’re not the only one…” I mumbled under my breath.

Nick pursed his lips. “So it’s a mutual agreement? Sam is creepy?”

“Yup,” I shook my head. “He is most definitely...different. Hey, don’t tell Leila this, but when he was kissing her, his eyes were on me the whole time.”

A look of disgust swept over his features. “You know what? I don’t trust the guy. I don’t want you leaving my sight until we get home.”

I leaned my head to one side and started to pick at my nails under the water. “Is that really any different than what normally happens around here?”

I could tell that kind of upset him, but it was the truth. I’m always around him.

“Well, I’m sorry if I care about you Ella. I just don’t want to see anything bad happening with you and this guy.”

“Oh. So now I can’t handle myself?” He groaned in frustration.

“Ella,” He started. “You know I didn’t mean it that way, stop making this such a big deal.”

Scoffing I stood up, water droplets rolling down my skin. “Think about what you’re saying before you say it Nick.” And with that, I walked into the house after wrapping myself into a towel and grabbing my clothes. I heard him scrambling out after me, trying to throw the cover on the hot tub. I walked straight to my room, ignoring the stares coming from the two in the living room, and slammed the door shut. I changed and lay on the side of the bed next to the wall after pulling my hair up because the tips were wet. The other side was Nick’s. Ten minutes later there was a soft knock on the door. I didn’t say anything. “Ella, I’m sorry. Can I come in? I-I just want to see if you’re ok. I can leave after I grab some clothes if you want me to.”

I wasn’t that mean to him, was I? He audibly sighed and opened the door slowly, peaking his head around it. Upon seeing me, he opened it wider and walked in, closing the door. He had a towel draped over his shoulder, water still visible on his abs. I rolled off the bed and started going through his drawers. Deciding on his pajamas, I brought the boxers along with a wife beater over to him. He took them and left for the bathroom. I laid down again and faced the wall, waiting for him to come back. I heard the door close and a body laid next to me, wrapping their arm around my waist. I placed a hand on his arm, dragging my fingernails from his knuckles to his elbow and back again. “I’m sorry, Nick. I didn’t mean anything I said. I’m just a little stressed I guess.”

I sighed, and relaxed into him. All of a sudden, I felt something on my ear, quickly realizing it was a pair of lips. He started to kiss down my neck at a slow pace. I pulled away and turned around quickly. “What the fuck, S-” He placed his hand over my mouth and stood up as the door opened. I was struggling to breathe. This is not happening. “What the hell are you doing in our room? Get out, Sam. We need to get to bed now,” Nick said in a strained tone, containing his evident temper.

Taking one last longing look at me, he brushed past Nick, whispering something I didn’t catch. I watched Nick pale before he quickly shut and lock the door. He walked over to me, waiting for my reaction. I jumped into his arms and a tear leaked from its duct. “What is happening? Why is he doing this, Nick?”

He placed multiple kisses on my cheeks and forehead, as if he was trying to erase my fear and shock. “I don’t know, Ella. I don’t know.”

I swallowed before whispering, “Don’t leave me alone again. I can’t have him touch me again. Never again...”

“I won’t let him anywhere near you. I’m sorry, so incredibly sorry.”

I shook my head and pulled back. “It’s not your fault. Let’s get some sleep now. Things might change tomorrow.”

We laid down side by side, his hand in mine, as we slowly fell asleep. And I couldn’t help my last thought to be: This can’t be happening.

[&scene&]