Midnight Runner
Chapter 15: False Hope.
Tears flowed from my face, on the sheets and mixed falling onto the floor. I had heard everything he said and it was spoken so beautiful so elegant… and it would never be spoken again. I sat up in bed facing front as I looked out to the window with the moon shinning directly in my face. It hit me like a rock. If we were never meant to be that meant I had to back off on even being around him, with nothing more or nothing less.
I sat up in bed for half of the night trying to translate all the words that he had whispered in my ear. “Your so stupid Jacob.” I hit my bed as I said his name then I hit it again and again it felt so good to take all my frustrations out on something that wouldn’t break my hand. “I’m done.” I sighed knowing each meaning to the two words I had just spoken. I grabbed my sheets, pulled them over me and snuggled back into bed where I closed my eyes tightly hoping that this all was a nightmare I needed to awake from.
“Hello?” I saw a shadow in the light but nothing more. “Paige?” It yelled back to me, as the voice seemed familiar. “Thomas!?” I shrieked when he came into view. “Paige.” It walked closer to me as a smile grew from his face. “I miss you.” He sighed as his smile slowly faded away. “How’s life?” He smiled again. “Okay but it would be better if you were here.” I smiled back to him. “Same here.” He still smiled then titled his head to the side. “But something is bothering you.” He sighed tilting his head to his other side. “ Paigee bear, whatever happens live life happily.” He said slowly fading from my reach and soon my eyesight.
“Thomas!” I sat up in bed searching my room for any sign of him but yet again found nothing. I ran my fingers through my hair; I pulled back the covers and walked to the bathroom. “Morning Paige.” Uncle Mark said waving and smiling to me on the way. “Yah, morning.” I sighed closing the door to the bathroom. I sat on the edge of the bathtub remembering that last night really did happen. Tears started to flood my eye until I wiped them away. “You cannot cry.” I murmured to myself over and over realizing that made me feel more confident. I turned on the hot water for a shower since I smelt horrible. I slid my pajamas off and climbed into the pearl white bathtub.
1 hour later. Without noticing the hot water started to run cold and my fingers started to look like prunes. Climbing out of the bath that I unplugged, I creped from the bathroom to my room like a ninja. I pulled out a pair of blue jeans and a yellow tank top from my closet. I walked down stairs still feeling like crap because of the night before. “It’s alive!” Uncle Mark said trying to hold in his laughter as he sat at the table eating eggs, bacon, biscuits, toast, hash browns and sausages. “I made breakfast, want some?” He grinned. A total different mood from mine. “No.” I bluntly said sitting down in the chair across from his. “What’s wrong kiddo?” He said with a bacon strip in his mouth. “Nothing for you to be concerned about.” I sighed again looking outside. “Oh well you start school in one day!” Uncle Mark squealed with excitement. “Oh yah, don’t remind me.” Sighing was now apart of my daily routine. “I got you everything you need too.” He squealed again. “So Mark what has made your day so great?” I grinned slightly trying to hide my sarcasm. “Well Charlie, Billy, Harry and I have decided we all want a huge bonfire with of course friends and family!” He said over using the hand motions. “Oh.” Whatever excitement I had left dissipated.
“It’s this Saturday.” He finished before getting up and cleaning up his mess. “Why not put me in the middle of a circle full of bears.” I mumbled looking out to the window. “What?” Mark said turning back to me. “Nothing, just mumbling.” I stood up, slipping on my sandals and opening the door to a beautiful, warm, rare day. I sat down the porch, turning my gaze towards the crystal clear blue sky above trying not to think at all.
I wanted to believe…I wanted to hope…I wanted to put my confidence in that Jacob was joking around or that he would come back and smile at me like always does, but deep down in the pit of my stomach I knew that what we had before was never going to happen again. My body hurt, my head hurt, but most of all my heart hurt. It hurt so bad that it felt like someone took a shard of glass and stuck it in my body and ripped a huge hole in it. False Hope. That’s what it was and it burned even more just thinking about him and the words he spoke.
Uncle Mark came outside and stood on the last step looking down at me. “Lets go visit Harry.” He glistened extending out his hand for me to reach. “Yah, okay.” I grabbed his hand and he helped me up from the steps. I stepped over to the passenger side of his car, getting in, buckling up and waiting for Uncle Mark to drive off.
The drive from home to Harry’s was rather quiet, but what did I have to talk about? I was afraid if I did talk that tears would start rolling and that would just bring up questions. We parked on the curb of Harry’s house. Harry, Leah and Seth walked out smiling and waving, climbing out of the car I smiled towards them. “Buddy o pal!” Harry said walking towards Uncle Mark and giving him a “man” hug. “The game has already started!” Harry said ushering Mark in. “Oh great, the old men are going to go watch the only exciting thing that ever happens in their life!” Leah shouted walking off behind the house. I turned my gaze towards Seth, smiling and watching as he came up giving me a bear hug. “Ugh!” I gasped for air as Seth laughed at my pain.
“What’s crackin?” He said trying to use the hip slang language. “Nothing.” I said trying to hold in my laughter. We walked over to a huge wooden stump and sat down looking off into the ocean. “How’s life?” He asked again raising his eyebrow. “It’s nothing to talk about.” Sighing I looked away. “Oh, well how's Jake?” Seth asked again trying to bring up a different question. That name. It hurt just to hear it. “I don’t know, we aren’t friends anymore.” I kept looking away as the tears started to come. “Oh, sorry.” Seth sighed rubbing his head.
I don’t really remember what happened after that but Seth and I talked and laughed non-stop for 2 hours about nothing or just things that we thought were stupid. Seth was my newfound friend I was looking for. He made me feel so much better and for 2 hours of the day he made me forget about Jacob. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I continued to laugh in unison with Seth. “So I herd your going to La Push high here on the reservation?” He questioned. “Yah, starting tomorrow.” I beamed towards him. “Awesome!” Seth yelled using his hands. “We need a girl in our group.” He paused trying to re-phrase what he said. “I mean it’s good we are getting another girl who won’t attack you every time you joke around with her.” Seth laughed trying not to say it to loud. “Leah means well.” I grinned. “Whatever means those are.” He shook his head.
Today started out rough but it ended better.
I sat at the kitchen table re looking over my schedule, books, bag and anything else that I needed to look at. First my books went in, then my notebook and last my pens and pencils. I was set! Tomorrow was my first day in public high school but the only bad part was I didn’t have the person I loved standing next to me to help me.
I sat up in bed for half of the night trying to translate all the words that he had whispered in my ear. “Your so stupid Jacob.” I hit my bed as I said his name then I hit it again and again it felt so good to take all my frustrations out on something that wouldn’t break my hand. “I’m done.” I sighed knowing each meaning to the two words I had just spoken. I grabbed my sheets, pulled them over me and snuggled back into bed where I closed my eyes tightly hoping that this all was a nightmare I needed to awake from.
“Hello?” I saw a shadow in the light but nothing more. “Paige?” It yelled back to me, as the voice seemed familiar. “Thomas!?” I shrieked when he came into view. “Paige.” It walked closer to me as a smile grew from his face. “I miss you.” He sighed as his smile slowly faded away. “How’s life?” He smiled again. “Okay but it would be better if you were here.” I smiled back to him. “Same here.” He still smiled then titled his head to the side. “But something is bothering you.” He sighed tilting his head to his other side. “ Paigee bear, whatever happens live life happily.” He said slowly fading from my reach and soon my eyesight.
“Thomas!” I sat up in bed searching my room for any sign of him but yet again found nothing. I ran my fingers through my hair; I pulled back the covers and walked to the bathroom. “Morning Paige.” Uncle Mark said waving and smiling to me on the way. “Yah, morning.” I sighed closing the door to the bathroom. I sat on the edge of the bathtub remembering that last night really did happen. Tears started to flood my eye until I wiped them away. “You cannot cry.” I murmured to myself over and over realizing that made me feel more confident. I turned on the hot water for a shower since I smelt horrible. I slid my pajamas off and climbed into the pearl white bathtub.
1 hour later. Without noticing the hot water started to run cold and my fingers started to look like prunes. Climbing out of the bath that I unplugged, I creped from the bathroom to my room like a ninja. I pulled out a pair of blue jeans and a yellow tank top from my closet. I walked down stairs still feeling like crap because of the night before. “It’s alive!” Uncle Mark said trying to hold in his laughter as he sat at the table eating eggs, bacon, biscuits, toast, hash browns and sausages. “I made breakfast, want some?” He grinned. A total different mood from mine. “No.” I bluntly said sitting down in the chair across from his. “What’s wrong kiddo?” He said with a bacon strip in his mouth. “Nothing for you to be concerned about.” I sighed again looking outside. “Oh well you start school in one day!” Uncle Mark squealed with excitement. “Oh yah, don’t remind me.” Sighing was now apart of my daily routine. “I got you everything you need too.” He squealed again. “So Mark what has made your day so great?” I grinned slightly trying to hide my sarcasm. “Well Charlie, Billy, Harry and I have decided we all want a huge bonfire with of course friends and family!” He said over using the hand motions. “Oh.” Whatever excitement I had left dissipated.
“It’s this Saturday.” He finished before getting up and cleaning up his mess. “Why not put me in the middle of a circle full of bears.” I mumbled looking out to the window. “What?” Mark said turning back to me. “Nothing, just mumbling.” I stood up, slipping on my sandals and opening the door to a beautiful, warm, rare day. I sat down the porch, turning my gaze towards the crystal clear blue sky above trying not to think at all.
I wanted to believe…I wanted to hope…I wanted to put my confidence in that Jacob was joking around or that he would come back and smile at me like always does, but deep down in the pit of my stomach I knew that what we had before was never going to happen again. My body hurt, my head hurt, but most of all my heart hurt. It hurt so bad that it felt like someone took a shard of glass and stuck it in my body and ripped a huge hole in it. False Hope. That’s what it was and it burned even more just thinking about him and the words he spoke.
Uncle Mark came outside and stood on the last step looking down at me. “Lets go visit Harry.” He glistened extending out his hand for me to reach. “Yah, okay.” I grabbed his hand and he helped me up from the steps. I stepped over to the passenger side of his car, getting in, buckling up and waiting for Uncle Mark to drive off.
The drive from home to Harry’s was rather quiet, but what did I have to talk about? I was afraid if I did talk that tears would start rolling and that would just bring up questions. We parked on the curb of Harry’s house. Harry, Leah and Seth walked out smiling and waving, climbing out of the car I smiled towards them. “Buddy o pal!” Harry said walking towards Uncle Mark and giving him a “man” hug. “The game has already started!” Harry said ushering Mark in. “Oh great, the old men are going to go watch the only exciting thing that ever happens in their life!” Leah shouted walking off behind the house. I turned my gaze towards Seth, smiling and watching as he came up giving me a bear hug. “Ugh!” I gasped for air as Seth laughed at my pain.
“What’s crackin?” He said trying to use the hip slang language. “Nothing.” I said trying to hold in my laughter. We walked over to a huge wooden stump and sat down looking off into the ocean. “How’s life?” He asked again raising his eyebrow. “It’s nothing to talk about.” Sighing I looked away. “Oh, well how's Jake?” Seth asked again trying to bring up a different question. That name. It hurt just to hear it. “I don’t know, we aren’t friends anymore.” I kept looking away as the tears started to come. “Oh, sorry.” Seth sighed rubbing his head.
I don’t really remember what happened after that but Seth and I talked and laughed non-stop for 2 hours about nothing or just things that we thought were stupid. Seth was my newfound friend I was looking for. He made me feel so much better and for 2 hours of the day he made me forget about Jacob. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I continued to laugh in unison with Seth. “So I herd your going to La Push high here on the reservation?” He questioned. “Yah, starting tomorrow.” I beamed towards him. “Awesome!” Seth yelled using his hands. “We need a girl in our group.” He paused trying to re-phrase what he said. “I mean it’s good we are getting another girl who won’t attack you every time you joke around with her.” Seth laughed trying not to say it to loud. “Leah means well.” I grinned. “Whatever means those are.” He shook his head.
Today started out rough but it ended better.
I sat at the kitchen table re looking over my schedule, books, bag and anything else that I needed to look at. First my books went in, then my notebook and last my pens and pencils. I was set! Tomorrow was my first day in public high school but the only bad part was I didn’t have the person I loved standing next to me to help me.