Life on Banana Street
Shortness
“Gabe, we need to talk.”
“Oh, I already had the sex talk,” he said laughing.
“No, not that one. I’m not sure if I want to go out with you anymore.”
“What are you saying? You want to break up?”
“Yes, but no. I still want to get married to you.”
“Then let’s go.”
“Go where?” He was putting on his jacket.
“Let’s go get married.”
“That’s the craziest-” I thought about it. “Let’s go.” He grabbed my arm and put me in the car.
“I love you Addie, and I want to do this.”
“I love you too.” He kissed me almost before we started making out and he put the car in drive.
“Wait, we need to invite our friends! And I need a dress!”
“Damn we do need to dress up don’t we?” He pulled into a store and picked something out right away for me.
“Here put this on the counter and this.”
“Your total’s $24.97, ma’am.”
“Gabe do you have money?”
“Yeah.” He got out his wallet and gave her 30 bucks.
“$5.03 is your change sir.”
“Thank you. Go put it on.” I did as he said and it was the tackiest, sluttiest thing ever. I came out of the dressing room and Gabe was there in a dork outfit.
“Gabe! What the hell?”
“It’s the classic couple; slut and geek.” I stared the Russell stare at him. “Well can we go?”
“So pushy…” We got back in the car and of course, he drove to the cheapest place in town. Five Minute Weddings. “Gabe, are you gonna be this cheap with me?”
“Well, I want to marry you badly, and this is the fastest way. And you once told me it doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it comes from the heart. And by golly [what’d I hit?] this comes from my heart.” I smiled and kissed him. He grabbed my hand and took me to the car. “Are you ready?”
“Gabe, you’re asking me this like we’re going to do it for the first time.”
“Well this is a big deal!”
“Yes I am ready. Let’s go.” We got out of the car and waited a few marriages until it was our turn.
“Will Adeline and Gabriel please step up. There’s 4 minutes left.” We went up there and held hands.
“Do you Adeline take Gabriel to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health? Till death do you both part?”
“I…” I felt like I was about to pass out. “Do.” A sigh of relief went over Gabe.
“And do you Gabriel take Adeline to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness and in health? Till death do you both part?”
“I do.”
“Then by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” We kissed for a few seconds and the preacher said, “Next!” He rubbed my cheek. For once in my life, I felt like I did something for the better. Now it would be even harder to talk to my old friends, planning everything.
Including the baby.
“Oh, I already had the sex talk,” he said laughing.
“No, not that one. I’m not sure if I want to go out with you anymore.”
“What are you saying? You want to break up?”
“Yes, but no. I still want to get married to you.”
“Then let’s go.”
“Go where?” He was putting on his jacket.
“Let’s go get married.”
“That’s the craziest-” I thought about it. “Let’s go.” He grabbed my arm and put me in the car.
“I love you Addie, and I want to do this.”
“I love you too.” He kissed me almost before we started making out and he put the car in drive.
“Wait, we need to invite our friends! And I need a dress!”
“Damn we do need to dress up don’t we?” He pulled into a store and picked something out right away for me.
“Here put this on the counter and this.”
“Your total’s $24.97, ma’am.”
“Gabe do you have money?”
“Yeah.” He got out his wallet and gave her 30 bucks.
“$5.03 is your change sir.”
“Thank you. Go put it on.” I did as he said and it was the tackiest, sluttiest thing ever. I came out of the dressing room and Gabe was there in a dork outfit.
“Gabe! What the hell?”
“It’s the classic couple; slut and geek.” I stared the Russell stare at him. “Well can we go?”
“So pushy…” We got back in the car and of course, he drove to the cheapest place in town. Five Minute Weddings. “Gabe, are you gonna be this cheap with me?”
“Well, I want to marry you badly, and this is the fastest way. And you once told me it doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it comes from the heart. And by golly [what’d I hit?] this comes from my heart.” I smiled and kissed him. He grabbed my hand and took me to the car. “Are you ready?”
“Gabe, you’re asking me this like we’re going to do it for the first time.”
“Well this is a big deal!”
“Yes I am ready. Let’s go.” We got out of the car and waited a few marriages until it was our turn.
“Will Adeline and Gabriel please step up. There’s 4 minutes left.” We went up there and held hands.
“Do you Adeline take Gabriel to be your lawfully wedded husband? In sickness and in health? Till death do you both part?”
“I…” I felt like I was about to pass out. “Do.” A sigh of relief went over Gabe.
“And do you Gabriel take Adeline to be your lawfully wedded wife? In sickness and in health? Till death do you both part?”
“I do.”
“Then by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” We kissed for a few seconds and the preacher said, “Next!” He rubbed my cheek. For once in my life, I felt like I did something for the better. Now it would be even harder to talk to my old friends, planning everything.
Including the baby.