In the Best Damn Dress I Own

Frank Iero’s Point of View

I knew I had to make things right. I didn’t mean to kiss her; she came on to me. I don’t even know why I wanted to deepen the kiss. It wasn’t like me. How could I have done this to Gerard?

Slowly, I got out of the hospital chair and walked into Gerard's room. It had been a good thirty minutes since Mikey left and since then, the crying had ceased. Opening the door, I saw that Gee was asleep, tears dried on his face. I could feel my heart twist in my chest.

What had I done to him? He was my Gerard, my wonderful, loving, adorable Gerard and I've destroyed him.

I felt like punching a hole in the wall. Anger rose in me. I was angry at myself for doing this to him. All he wanted was for someone to support him and love him. I couldn’t even do that and he was my boyfriend.

I felt warm tears trickle down my cheeks as I watched his chest slowly raise and fall. I sat down in a chair next to his hospital bed and took his hand in mine. I wish I could take everything back. Just start over. This whole experience has made me realize just how much I love him.

I wanted to kill Erika for coming onto me. How dare she?! If I saw her again, I was going to kill her, I swear.

I was snapped from my train of murderous thoughts by a hand being jerked away from mine. Gerard was awake.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” he snapped.

“Gee, please just hear me out,” I begged.

“Fine; you have five minutes before I call the nurses in here to escort you out,” he said coldly.

I sighed. “Okay. I know you told me about Erika and how she hurt you. I'm not sure what had gotten into me, but when she kissed me, I felt drawn towards her. I don’t know why. The entire time I've been with you, I've never felt like this towards anyone else. Only you. I don’t know…I just had this attraction to her and…” I couldn’t finish what I was saying before I choked up and burst into tears.

“I-I'm just so sorry!” I sobbed out. “Gee, I love you and I'm so-sorry!”

I put my head on the side of the bed, my hands covering my face, and continued to cry. I jumped when I felt a hand on my back. Thinking it was a doctor or a nurse, I pushed it away, but as soon as I did so, their hand was right back on my back. I looked up only to see that Gerard was the one who was rubbing my back.

I somehow managed to calm myself down and Gerard put in his words.

“Frank, I want to take you back, but I'm not ready to forgive you. So, right now we’re just going to be close friends. I want to be to know that I can fully trust you again, even if it didn’t work out so well last time. You need to put your devotion into me as well if you want us to ever be together again. So, for right now, we’re not together. We are nothing but mere friends. Maybe in a few months time, I’ll be ready to forgive you, but in that time, you need to prove faithful to me. If you go out and start dating other people in this time, then it’s over; now and forever. If you really love me like you say you do, you'll have no problem doing this. Also, I’ll be able to watch you now since I'm no longer in the pageant…” he trailed off. Why wasn’t he still in the pageant?

“Do you agree?” Gerard asked after a few deep breaths.

“Yes, yes of course. I’ll do anything for you. I want to ask you something though…why aren’t you in the pageant anymore? They didn’t find out, did they?”

“No, they didn’t. Mikey told Evaleene that I was dropping out,” he said, looking at the blinding white hospital bed sheets.

How could Mikey do something like that? As if he hadn’t hurt Gerard enough already. I got up, ready to work this situation out, but Gerard grabbed my hand.

“Where’re you going?” he asked, worry in his voice.

“Don’t worry about it. I promise you that I'm going to be loyal. I just need to run a few errands and I promise that I’ll be back later. Don’t worry Gee; I plan on not screwing this chance up. I’ll be back in about an hour, okay?” I asked, taking his hand and kissing it lightly.

“Okay…please don’t hurt Mikey,” he mumbled as I walked to the door. I nodded and left the hospital building, heading for where the pageant was being held.

Once I arrived, I immediately saw Evaleene. I walked up to her and she saw me, giving me a look of disgust.

“You have some nerve coming in here after what you did to Genna,” she spoke.

“I know. I screwed up immensely and we’re trying to work things out. I wanted to talk to you about Genna though. Her brother Mikey told you that she was dropping out, right?”

“Yes,” she replied, putting her hands on her hips.

“Well, I think she should be given another chance. You see, I've been talking to her while at the hospital and she never wanted to drop out. Mikey just assumed that it would be best, but Genna is stronger than that. She's wanted to compete for so long and now that she finally got in, mayhem struck and now her dream is crushed. Would you please consider letting her back in?” I pleaded.

She thought for a moment, studying me as if to see if my body language matched what I had said, but finally spoke.

“I’ll think about it. You know, you're one lucky guy if she's even agreed to talk to you about what you did. I’ll let you know in two days on my final decision. By then Genna should be out of the hospital and better, correct?”

“Yes ma’am,” I said quickly.

“Alright. Like I said; I’ll think about it. In the mean time, you better not try any funny business with anyone else. Genna is a special girl. A breath of fresh air, and I can't stand to know that she's upset, especially if it’s caused by the man she supposedly loved.”

I nodded. What she said struck a nerve. Gerard is extremely special. He had the guts to enter in this pageant and he stuck with it, completely aware of the fear that someone might find out. Even though he knew it could happen, he stuck with it and didn’t give up. This whole play of events has shown me just how strong Gerard really is. How I was so foolish to cheat on him with Erika, I will never know. I may still feel something towards Erika, but they aren’t as near as strong as the vastly growing feeling towards Gerard. I guess I really never knew how much I loved him, but that’s going to change.

“Thank you so, so much Evaleene,” I said.

“You're welcome. Don’t let it happen again, and tell Genna that I hope she gets better,” she said, smiling a little.

“I will,” I replied, my smile wide.

Maybe things would work out in the end. Just maybe…