In the Best Damn Dress I Own
The Ruiner
Frank Iero’s Point of View
I was taking Gerard to his dress rehearsal, and neither of us were speaking for some reason. He just kept staring out the window.
“I'm sorry,” he suddenly said, scaring the crap out of me. I was getting used to the silence.
“For what? You have nothing to be sorry for,” I told him.
“Frank, you know what I'm sorry for. Christ, look at your arms and tell me that I have nothing to be sorry for. What I did was uncalled for, and it made me realize something,” he said to me. I took a quick glance at my arms, looking at the little details that his fingernails had made on me. I shook the cold feelings I had away.
“What did you realize?” I asked him.
“You really do deserve better than me.”
That was all he said; no detail, no nothing. Why would he think such a thing?
“Gerard, I don’t deserve better because I have the best. Sure, what you did to me was highly unnecessary and a bit… creepy, to say the least, but I love you. If you want to compete in a pageant, then do so. I will support you,” I said.
He didn’t respond to what I had said like I hoped he would. There was something wrong with him, and I hoped that he would tell me something other than ‘I don’t deserve better than him’. It’s not true. In fact, I should be a better boyfriend to him. He’s the one that deserves better.
I pulled up to the pageant place and Gerard got out.
“Are you coming?” he asked me, looking through the window.
“Do you want me to?” I asked.
“Only if you, ya’ know, want to,” he shrugged.
I smiled at him and nodded. He looked so different when he was dressed up as a girl. He was still so… beautiful though.
I got out of the car and walked with him up to the entrance. We were almost immediately greeted by Evaleene.
“Hello you two!” she said, hugging Gerard.
“How have you been?” she asked us.
“Pretty good,” I answered for the both of us. No one needed to know what had happened. That was strictly between Gerard and me.
Gerard gave me a small smile and took my hand in his.
“So I take it everything’s all worked out between you two?” Evaleene asked, grinning widely.
“Yep,” Gerard said. He, too, was all smiles now.
We walked back to where they would be doing a run through of the pageant and I took a seat in a chair. Gerard walked off somewhere. I assumed he was getting ready for whatever they were going to do. After waiting for about twenty minutes at least, the girls filed out in a single line. Evaleene told them how they were going to do everything, and made them walk around. I honestly couldn’t care less about all of this, but I would support Gerard in whatever he wanted to do.
I really had been a horrible boyfriend to him. I let Erika put a dent in our relationship all because I wanted to know what being with a girl was like. I am so stupid. I regret everything bad that I’d done to him. He just didn’t deserve it.
A while later, Evaleene let everyone have a short break. They were actually pretty good. Erika walked over to me.
“Did ya’ miss me?” she asked.
“No,” I said bluntly.
She looked at me with disgust.
“You know, I don’t know what Gerard sees in you,” she said, whispering Gerard's name. “Actually, I don’t know what you see in that cross-dresser. You could have so much better. A loving wife in the future, children, the perfect suburban family life, but no. You choose to be abnormal,” she spoke.
“Where the hell do you get off? There is nothing abnormal about our relationship. I would really like it if you could just leave both of us alone,” I said to her.
“Well what fun would that be? Frankie, I could always just let it slip that Genna is actually Gerard. Evaleene would have a fit. Gerard would be kicked out of the pageant. And the two of you would be the mockery of the entire town. Face it; I'm going to win no matter what you do,” she said.
“Listen to me, okay? Gerard has never wanted anything so badly in his whole life before, and if you ruin it, then I will not rest until you pay for it. I have faith in him, and if you really want to take your chances, then go for it,” I stated.
“You don’t know who you're messing with Frankie my boy,” she said before walking away.
I didn’t know what I was getting myself into, but I was almost certain that it wasn’t anything good. I may have just ruined Gerard.
I was taking Gerard to his dress rehearsal, and neither of us were speaking for some reason. He just kept staring out the window.
“I'm sorry,” he suddenly said, scaring the crap out of me. I was getting used to the silence.
“For what? You have nothing to be sorry for,” I told him.
“Frank, you know what I'm sorry for. Christ, look at your arms and tell me that I have nothing to be sorry for. What I did was uncalled for, and it made me realize something,” he said to me. I took a quick glance at my arms, looking at the little details that his fingernails had made on me. I shook the cold feelings I had away.
“What did you realize?” I asked him.
“You really do deserve better than me.”
That was all he said; no detail, no nothing. Why would he think such a thing?
“Gerard, I don’t deserve better because I have the best. Sure, what you did to me was highly unnecessary and a bit… creepy, to say the least, but I love you. If you want to compete in a pageant, then do so. I will support you,” I said.
He didn’t respond to what I had said like I hoped he would. There was something wrong with him, and I hoped that he would tell me something other than ‘I don’t deserve better than him’. It’s not true. In fact, I should be a better boyfriend to him. He’s the one that deserves better.
I pulled up to the pageant place and Gerard got out.
“Are you coming?” he asked me, looking through the window.
“Do you want me to?” I asked.
“Only if you, ya’ know, want to,” he shrugged.
I smiled at him and nodded. He looked so different when he was dressed up as a girl. He was still so… beautiful though.
I got out of the car and walked with him up to the entrance. We were almost immediately greeted by Evaleene.
“Hello you two!” she said, hugging Gerard.
“How have you been?” she asked us.
“Pretty good,” I answered for the both of us. No one needed to know what had happened. That was strictly between Gerard and me.
Gerard gave me a small smile and took my hand in his.
“So I take it everything’s all worked out between you two?” Evaleene asked, grinning widely.
“Yep,” Gerard said. He, too, was all smiles now.
We walked back to where they would be doing a run through of the pageant and I took a seat in a chair. Gerard walked off somewhere. I assumed he was getting ready for whatever they were going to do. After waiting for about twenty minutes at least, the girls filed out in a single line. Evaleene told them how they were going to do everything, and made them walk around. I honestly couldn’t care less about all of this, but I would support Gerard in whatever he wanted to do.
I really had been a horrible boyfriend to him. I let Erika put a dent in our relationship all because I wanted to know what being with a girl was like. I am so stupid. I regret everything bad that I’d done to him. He just didn’t deserve it.
A while later, Evaleene let everyone have a short break. They were actually pretty good. Erika walked over to me.
“Did ya’ miss me?” she asked.
“No,” I said bluntly.
She looked at me with disgust.
“You know, I don’t know what Gerard sees in you,” she said, whispering Gerard's name. “Actually, I don’t know what you see in that cross-dresser. You could have so much better. A loving wife in the future, children, the perfect suburban family life, but no. You choose to be abnormal,” she spoke.
“Where the hell do you get off? There is nothing abnormal about our relationship. I would really like it if you could just leave both of us alone,” I said to her.
“Well what fun would that be? Frankie, I could always just let it slip that Genna is actually Gerard. Evaleene would have a fit. Gerard would be kicked out of the pageant. And the two of you would be the mockery of the entire town. Face it; I'm going to win no matter what you do,” she said.
“Listen to me, okay? Gerard has never wanted anything so badly in his whole life before, and if you ruin it, then I will not rest until you pay for it. I have faith in him, and if you really want to take your chances, then go for it,” I stated.
“You don’t know who you're messing with Frankie my boy,” she said before walking away.
I didn’t know what I was getting myself into, but I was almost certain that it wasn’t anything good. I may have just ruined Gerard.