My Chemical Life

"Lex! Are you ready yet?" Hayley asked, poking her head into my room. I was currently in a black bathrobe while I was fixing my hair in the bathroom.

"Um, no? I can't fucking decide how to put my hair," I groaned, pushing my fringe out of my face.

"Ooh! I have a great idea!" she exclaimed, running into the bathroom. She was dressed in a beautiful black and white gown, her mask was placed on my desk (let your imagination go wild cuz I can't describe good). She sat me down on the toilet and put my hair in a bun, random hair staying out. She curled the strands and then smiled in content. I gasped when I looked in the mirror before hugging her.

"Thanks Hail. You're a life saver!" I exclaimed, hugging her.

"No prob. Now get ready birthday girl!" she demanded before picking up her mask and skipping away in her heels. Talent girl she is. I pulled on my dress, heels, and then mask before looking over my appearance in my full length mirror. Suddenly my door was opened and closed by none other than Jessie.

"Hey Lexi. Oh my god! You look gorgeous!" she exclaimed, making me twirl for her.

"Drop Dead, Gorgeous?" I giggled, amused that I could add a band here.

"Yeah, sure," she replied, rolling her eyes.

"Well look at you! You look beautiful!" I exclaimed, admiring her in her own outfit (minus the long train). Her hair was slightly curled and rested on her shoulders.

"Ah but no eyes will be on me tonight. It's going to be all you," Jessie pointed out with a grin.

"I think Keith will be giving you stares," I giggled out. Jessie blushed and slapped my arm playfully.

"Not cool! Plus he's four years younger than me," she huffed, crossing her arms.

"So what? You know you like him," I teased. She rolled her eyes before walking out my door, me following closely behind her. I blushed as all the girls turned to stare at me and Jessie with awe.

"Oh my god! You look stunning! If I was a dude I would so rape you right now!" Val squealed while hugging me. We all exploded in laughter at Val's twisted logic.

"Where's all the guys?" I asked. The only people here were Lacey, Val, Michelle, Gena, Leana (still don't like her much), Hayley, Jessie, and Vicky T were here.

"The guys all went to the ball thingy. Matt and Patrick were going to make sure everyone didn't fuck up the arrangements and the guys didn't want to deal with 'girls panicking over everything'," Vicky T replied with air quotes. We all giggled before Gena announced the limo was here. Fifteen minutes later we were pulled to a stop in front of a huge hall, many photographers waiting.

"Let's go bitches!" Lacey yelled from the other end. We laughed before I opened the door and was suddenly attacked with flashes. I simply walked the short way to the doors and pulled it open.

"Happy birthday Lexi!" everyone yelled. I could see all the bands who had greeted me earlier, the Berries, Keith, and a couple of people from the neighborhood.

“Thanks everyone!” I yelled at the top of my lungs. Suddenly I was picked up and spun in a circle as I was embraced.

“You look great!” all of Panic yelled after Brendon placed me down.

“Aww. Thanks guys. You all look so handsome!” I squealed. All the guys were dressed fancy-ish and it fit them all so damn well.

“Thank you my dear,” Ryan said, kissing my hand.

“Excuse me. May I cut it?” a voice said behind me. Ryan and the guys looked hesitant but gave my hand to the person anyways. I was pulled to the dance floor as a techno like beat came from the huge speakers.

“Having fun so far?” Alex questioned, smiling as he twirled me in a circle. He was dressed in nice black jeans, black converse, and a black long sleeve t-shirt. Not exactly fancy but at least he decided to try. I leaned my back against him and started to grinding my hips into his.

“I think you definitely are,” I giggled. He groaned as his “problem” was poking into my ass. He quickly excused himself and ran off somewhere. I laughed at his horniness before hugging Matt from behind, making him jump slightly.

“Ah, happy birthday hun,” Matt said while hugging me back.

“Thanks Matt for everything! You rock!” I exclaimed over the sound of “Shake It” by Metro Station started. I’m pretty damn sure Jessie and Keith made the mix CD.

“You might want to thank Patrick too. He help book most of the shit!” he called back. I nodded before going to find Patrick, dancing around to the beat of the music.

“Patty! I love you!” I yelled, jumping up and hugging Patrick from behind My legs were wrapped around his waist and arms were holding onto his shoulders.

“Haha. I love you too?” he laughed.

“Thank you for the party,” I yelled to him after getting off his back.

“No problem sweatheart!” he said, pulling me in for a proper hug. Since I’m sure you don’t want to read a very long paragraph, I’ll shorten it. I ended up talking to everyone there, Aiden and Evan ended up talking and became boyfriends (which I was just now getting told about), we all did the Thriller dance (great times), and I got lots of presents. Now everyone was slowly leaving but me and Alex were in a make out session behind the stage where the bands had taken turns performing.

“Alex it’s getting late, I need to go. I will see you tomorrow,” I sighed as I broke the heated battle for dominance. He whined before he kissed me once more and walked out of the building. I walked over to Pete and took off my mask before resting my head on his shoulder.

“Tired?” he laughed.

“You don’t know the half of it,” I sighed. He helped balance me as we walked to the limo that stayed behind to drive me, FOB, Evan, and Aiden to my house. Yeah, Aiden and Evan are staying with me and the guys for two weeks as their presents. Too bad I have to fucking go to school again in two days so i won't be able to spend as much time with them ((A/n: she means the weekend is almost over, not the first day of school)). Yeah, my birthday is on a Saturday this year. Hell yeah!

“What are we doing for the rest of the night? It’s only eleven,” Evan said, stating the obvious.

“What do you mean only eleven? I’m fucking tired!” I exclaimed, sleep starting to over take me. Everyone laughed before the limo pulled to a stop. Aiden effortlessly picked me up bride style before walking into the house and up the stairs to my room.

“Are you going to be able to change on your own or do you want me to help you?” Aiden asked as Evan walked in and shut the door. No he’s not a pedophile, he’s like an older brother to me just like Evan. And no he doesn’t like me like that so it’s not “incest” either.

“I'm too tired!” I whined in a baby voice. They both laughed before Evan carefully took off my heels and unzipped my dress. Soon it fell to the floor and together they put me in some black basketball shorts and a grey tank top. Aiden placed me into bed and Evan tucked me in before they started to leave.

“Thanks guys,” I yawned as I cuddled into one of my pillows.

“No problem Lei,” Evan replied before turning off my light and turning my stereo on so Mayday Parade lightly filled my room. I shut my eyes and started to fell myself fall into sleep. Suddenly what sounded like my window was pulled open and someone stepped inside the room. Since I was half asleep I figured it was nothing and tried to sleep again. Suddenly my bed sunk on my right which meant someone was sitting on it. After opening my eyes I could see the outline of Alex as he grinned down on me.

“Alex? What are you doing here?” I managed out between yawns.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you babe. Can I stay here?” he asked with a small smirk. I just nodded and scooted over to make room for him. He tossed off his boots before climbing into bed and I cuddled into his chest. Suddenly he started to nibble on my neck and I let out a moan. He started to try and slip my shorts off and I quickly shoved his hands off.

“You know Alex what I’m about to say,” I grumbled, turning on my other side so my back was to him. He sighed deeply too and hugged me from behind.

“Sorry babe. I try to control myself but you know it’s hard, right? Can you forgive me?” he whispered in my ear. I just nodded, too tired to try and think. He gave me one last squeeze and kiss on the head before slipping off into dreamland. I laid there for the next few minutes thinking about what I should do. These "urges" of his have been getting more and more frequent and it was really starting to worry/annoy me. I sighed angrily as I realized I probably wasn’t going to be able to sleep for a while. Sighing in defeat, I climbed out of bed and grabbed my iPod before going out of my room.

“Can’t sleep?” I turned to see Pete with an all knowing look fromDad’s his temporary room. I nodded before heading to the music room, Pete closing his door as he probably went to go to sleep. I walked in the music and shut the door before looking around. Including my room, this is the room I’m in the most in the whole house. I sat on the familiar window seat and stared out at the backyard. The pool’s lights were still on and the tiki hunt thing in the back had it’s lights on too. I put my earphones in my ears and pressed shuffle. The familiar sound from “Where’d You Go?” by Fort Minor started to play and I sang along.

“Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.

She said "Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,"
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long,
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

You know the place where you used to live,
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,
But now, you only stop by every once and a while,
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless,
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home...
Please come back home…”

Tears started to stream down my face and I furiously started to wipe them away.

No! I don’t miss them! They’re assholes and I hope they die in some fucking freak accident!

Oh quit lying. You know you miss them so stop trying to tell yourself different.

Oh great, your back. Are you sure you never leave?

Yep, your stuck with me forever.

B-e-a-fucking-utiful!

But I’m right, aren’t I?

…Maybe

Yeah, I am right

I sighed as I had nothing to come back with. It’s true that I may, I repeat may, miss them but it doesn't seem they miss me. I laid down on the window seat, just staring at the stars and full moon. I shut my eyes as the sound of “Sorrow” by Flyleaf started.

Ain’t this song the truth?