Chasing Echoes

It had been two days since my little thing with Joe and I hadn’t told anyone why I was about to cry, Mazz and Julia begged me to tell them but I wouldn’t. Since my freak out though they had been all over me making sure I was ok and wasn’t drinking. No one had told Mike though because he would probably take me back to rehab and make me spend another two months there. We also hadn’t recorded anything new in two days and I think Mike was freaking out along with everyone else. I had been trying to write but kept getting stuck with writers block. There wasn’t anything good to write about other then Joe and I didn’t want my whole album to be about him, there was already 3 songs on the album well 4 in you count Forever & Always. I needed new inspiration. Mike decided I needed a break from the studio and had booked me to do a photo shoot for the album and tour today. When Mazz heard I was going to a photo shoot she jumped at the chance to go with me; secretly I think she wanted her picture taken.

“You ready yet?” Mazz asked tapping her nails on the sink while I brushed my teeth.

“Do I look ready?” I asked rolling my eyes and I kept brushing.

“No. Why are you wearing that?” Mazz asked and I heard the disgust in her voice.

“Mazz their nothing wrong with what I’m wearing it’s just clothes” I said as I spit the toothpaste out.

“But you look like your going to a bonfire on the beach not a photo shoot.” Mazz sighed.

“Why do you want me to change so badly?” I asked.

“Ugh fine go looking like a bum!” Mazz yelled then walked out waving her hands in the air and I just rolled my eyes.

I had no idea why Mazz was practically begging me to change I mean I dressed like this everyday and I didn’t think I looked that bad. I was going to a photo shoot not the Grammy’s and at the photo shoot I would be changing clothes like crazy so I mite as well be comfy if I was going to be in skin tight clothes all day. I threw the tooth brush onto the skin the wiped my mouth off then hit the bathroom light as I walked out. I was about to look for Mazz but then I heard a car horn and I knew she was outside already waiting. I sighed and walked out to the car where Mazz was setting in the driver set with expensive Chanel glasses covering her eyes, this was going to be one long day.

---

I heard Leaving playing on the radio as I did poses lying on the bed. All they had me in was a fitted pair of light grey skinny jeans, a black lacey bra, and a white big wife beater. I though it was a little slutty but I was 21 almost 22 so I was aloud to be sexy if I wanted.

“Lay on the bed turn to me and angle your body back so we can see your whole body.” The photographer, James, said.

I did as I was told and I heard many snaps. I was excited to see the pictures because these were going on the album.



“Ok we got the money shot. Now turn on your stomach and put your feet in the air. Place one hand over the other then turn you head and look at me.” James said and talked with his hands.



After I did the pose perfect we worked on a couple more. Which James, Mazz, and Mike all loved, I on the other hand wasn’t too fond of I think they made me look like a whore. A cheap on at that.





After I saw the pictures I was ordered to change for the tour photos. I was rushed back to hair and make up where they put rollers in my hair and wiped all my make up. As they started redoing my make up they showed me dress after dress to see which one I liked best. I ended up picking an off the shoulder black dress. I heard the door open and I turned to see who it was and the chick putting my lipstick on got it all over my cheek. I watched Kevin, Joe, and Nick all walk in and be seated instantly and people rushed over to them. I looked at them in shock. Why in the hell were they here? I felt the annoying lipstick lady trying to wipe the red lipstick off my cheek and I grabbed the napkin from her.

“Go I’ll take care of it myself.” I hissed.

I learned up closer to the mirror as I dug the napkin into my cheek hoping it would remove the red. All the boys set in silent’s and watches as I scrubbed the lipstick off my cheek.

“Why are you here?” I asked finally as I still scrubbed.

“You don’t know?” Kevin said and Joe put his hands over his face.

“Know what?” I asked turning to look at him.

“We're on tour with you.” Nick said looking at me.

“What?” I hissed and threw the tissue down.

“Yeah it’s been set for the last month while you where on vacation and stuff Mike was working on the tour.” Nick said.

“Nick shut up!” Joe hissed loudly and hit Nick in the back of the head.

“Ouch you mother…” Nick started to yelled but Mazz came in.

“You ready Dollface?” Mazz asked.

“No! Where is Mike?” I asked getting up.

“Out there talking to James. Why?” Mazz asked.

“Because we have some business to take care of.” I said pushing past Mazz out onto the set.

I saw Mike and James talking and using their hands like crazy. They must be talking about angles they want me and the boys. Thing about the boys ticked me off more and no way was I going on tour with them. I had already been on tour with them once before and it ended with me having a broken heart. Also I really didn’t want to be near Joe.

“Mike are you seriously putting me back on tour with him?” I asked interrupting his conversion with James.

“Kourtney it’s not just a him it’s a them. Just do this photo shoot and we’ll talk about this later.” Mike said and shot me a glare.

“Whatever! I’m not doing this tour though!” I yelled and walked back to the makeup room.

I sighed in frustration as I walked back over to my makeup chair. Kevin and Nick were back getting dressed and Joe was still in his chair getting his makeup done. I rolled my eyes at him. I really didn’t want to go on tour with him again. I could see it being an emotional rollercoaster again. I felt the annoying lipstick lady start wiping my face again.

“Kourtney…” Joe started quietly but I cut him off.

“Joe just stop I don’t want to hear it. If we end up on tour together it will be awkward enough so please just shut up for once and don’t make it anymore awkward then it needs to be.” I said and the lady put fresh lipstick on my lips.

“Ok.” I heard Joe mutter as they took him to wardrobe.

I felt the rollers being taken out of my hair and watched it fall into big curls. I felt the lady tug at my hair as she pinned my bangs back and gave me a little poof. Once she finished the rest of my makeup she led me back to the dressing room. I saw Kevin and Nick getting the hem of their pants fixed while they tired to fix their ties. I looked for him out of instinct and saw him pulling the shirt he had on a mite ago off. I looked at his toned body and tired not melt into a puddle or run an attack him. I knew I was still staring and probably drooling over his body, Joe must have felt my eyes on him because he looked over and a small smile spread across his face. I tore my eyes away as the people handed me clothes, I looked around for a stall or bathroom and didn’t see one.

“You can change in front of us. It’s not like I haven’t seen you in underwear before.” Joe said and I heard him mutter the last part.

“Nah I’ll go find a bathroom.” I said and clung to the dress as I walked out of the room.

---

Joe, Kevin, Nick, and I had just spent the last hour taking a bunch of pictures together. Most of the time I was next to Joe or Kevin, I think it’s only because they think it will look more appealing if I’m hanging off the two oldest Jonas Brothers. Personally I didn’t care to be close to Kevin. Joe on the other hand was a totally different story. I was currently setting on a platform with my legs crossed and my right arm hanging over my legs while I held myself up with the left. Nick was setting in front of me, Joe was at my feet leaning against my legs, and Kevin was standing behind me. I plastered on a fake smile while the camera snapped away and we were told to change facial expressions. The camera snapped away at us a few more times as we changed expression every snap.

“Ok now Nick and Kevin come out of their. Kourtney and Joe stand up and Joe get behind Kourtney.” James said and held up his hands trying to angle as we all got up.

“What are you doing why are we having a photo together?” I asked confused.

“Because of the single What Hurt’s The Most.” Mike said beating James to the punch.

“Are you shitting me?” I asked glaring at Mike.

If only looks could kill Mike would be toast.

“Watch you language and no I’m not shitting you. Just do the shoot so I can get the fuck out of here.” Mike said and ran a hand threw his brown/grey hair.

“You so owe me!” I yelled as I walked over to Joe.

James ran over to us and was like trying to move us both I was willing to move likes James puppet which lets to him moving Joe everywhere. Somehow Joe ended up pressed against me with his hand on my inner thigh and his face in my hair like he was kissing my hair. I felt really awkward and Joe’s hand was ice cold on my thigh, I had to reframe from shaking. I have stopped listening to James and was trying to focus on somewhere warm when I felt Joe’s other hand fell on my hip and grip it tight and his hand slid a little farther up my dress. Every part on my wanted to moan his name but I bit my lip, Joe bite my ear softly. This had to be the hottest and weirdest shoot I had ever done but some part of me was enjoying this was more then I should. I felt his hand go up a little farther and my head dropped a little and my hair fell in my face as my lip was about to start bleeding from how much I was enjoying this.

“Joey Bear!” I voice yelled and I heard the studio door open.

Joe’s hands flew off me and he stepped like 4 feet back behind me. I rolled my eyes at Joe and looks to see Allison glaring at me; I just rolled my eyes at her. Allison walked past me and pushes me lightly which caused me to put my foot out and trip her on “Accident”. I watchedPrince Charming Joe help her up and as he took her left hand I seen something sparkle. I looked at it trying to see what it was but Joe’s hand was covering it. Allison seen me looking at her hand and she sent me a devious smile which Joe didn’t see. I watched it play out in slow motion Allison pulled Joe to her and pressed her lips against his and cupped his face with her hands which gave me a clear view of what the sparkle was. It was a ring on her wedding finger, I felt my heart stop and my mouth hit the floor. Joe was marrying her of all people her. I shook my head and heard a scream which caused everyone to turn to Mike.

“What’s wrong Mike?” I asked.

Mike didn’t answer me and I heard my phone go off but Mike snatched it before I got a chance to get it. Joe was now standing by my side along with Mazz who had her hand on my arm, I didn’t understand what was going on and I don’t think they did either. I watched Mike rip the computer that all the photos were appearing on and type in Perez Hilton’s site. I watched the screen pop up and my face dropped in horror as I ran over to the computer. Their I was on display formillions billions to see and they got the most personal view they could of me. As I scrolled past the nude pictures of me I could feel everyone already against me looking as well once I got to the video. It had Sex Tape written in huge letters on it. I bit my lip as tears started to fall and my chest was hurting, everyone was going to be able to watch me get raped over and over. Everyone could watch my innocents get stripped of me. I put my hand over my face as tears started to fall and I felt Mazz grab me and pull me to her. I heard a scream and moaning and knew someone had clicked play and was watching it.

“Kourtney how could you not tell me this? Did you do this before the thing?” Mike asked and I could tell he was angry and talking about rehab.

“I didn’t tell you believe I didn’t want the whole fucking world to know I was raped by that fucker on the screen right their! I didn’t want to explain why I went home and tired to kill myself because I was so disgusted with everything that happened to me! So yeah there you go Mike I said it I tired to kill myself and I wish I would have at this moment!” I screamed and I heard moans and screams still coming from the computer and I picked it up and threw it down onto the floor as hard as I could and everything turned silent.

“Kourtney if you would have told me this I could have stopped this.” Mike shook his head.

“What do you mean you could have stopped this?” I asked angry as tears fell.

“I got an e-mail requesting 50 thousand dollars if you didn’t want pictures or tapes of you to get out. I though it was a joke because people have threatened stuff like that before so I sent the dude a fuck off but I guess he wasn’t lying.” Mike said and shook his head.

“You had a chance to stop this to make it go away and you didn’t!” I screamed while tears poured out of my eyes. “I can’t believe this you’re my manager you’re suppose to protect me not let everyone see what happened to me when I got everything I had taken away from me!”

“Kourtney I didn’t know he was for real! How could you let this happen to you?” Mike yelled back.

“I can’t take this anymore!” I said and turned towalk run away and as I opened the door.
I turned back to everyone to see them all looking. Mazz had worried written all over her face, Nick was looking down at the floor along with Kevin, Joe looked disgusted, and Mike looked disappointed in me. I just turned and walked out of studio and into the bright light of the sun.

I'm Kourtney Ryan and I just pulled a Paris Hilton.