Shut Up and *** Me, You Asshole!

“C’mon, just one?”

“No! I don’t want to kiss you!”

“You know you want to kiss me.”

“Who says I do?”

“You did. Last night. You had a dream about me, and all you said was ‘Just one kiss, Kasey.’”

“How do you know I wasn’t talking about another Kasey?”

“Well, you don’t know any other Kaseys.”

“How do you know? You been stalking me, Micheals?”

“Oh, of course Atric, I’ve been stalking you. Why wouldn’t I be? I just want your body.”

“What are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I’m trying to kiss you, silly.”

“Get away, you faggot!”

“Don’t try to hide your feelings, Atric! I heard you the other night, in the bathroom. ‘Ohh, Kasey! OHHH, KASEY!”

“Shut up. I did not say anything like that. You know it.”

“Please? One kiss? I’ll leave you alone for the price of one kiss.”

“Why do you want to kiss me so bad anyway?”

“Because, you’re amazing, and why wouldn’t I?” Kasey countered.

“Because I’m not gay.”

“Well, neither am I. I’m bi sexual. But you not being gay wouldn’t stop me if I really wanted to kiss you.”

“What would stop you?”

“Nothing. I will kiss you, Atric, and you’ll like it so much, you’ll be begging me to do… Other things to you.”

“W-why would I do that? I don’t like you!”

“Then why is your voice cracking?”

“Puberty?”

“That makes me want to jump your bones even more.”

“Get away! You’re not getting a kiss!”

“I’ll lock you in the bathroom until you agree to give me a kiss.”

“You wouldn’t!”

“I just did.”

“I can’t believe you would push me in here! You know I’m not strong like you! Let me out, damn it!”

“Not until you kiss me!”

“Fine. I guess I’m going to be in here for the rest of my life.”

“You know, it wouldn’t be that bad. I’ve been told I’m a great kisser by my exes.”

“I’m NOT a faggot!”

“Ooohh.. Touchy, touchy! Being over defensive is not a good thing when you’re trying to prove you’re not gay, you know?”

“Shut up. And let me out, Micheals!”

“No way, Atric. You’re stuck ‘till you give me a kiss.”

“Please let me out, Kasey? I will appreciate it so much.”

“Giving me a boner by talking like that isn’t the way to get out of the bathroom.”

“God, you’re such a fag.”

“You seem to like that word, you know that, right?”

“Shut up. Your voice is giving me a headache.”

“You wouldn’t have that headache if you had just kissed me three hours ago when I woke you up and asked.”

“You woke me up at 4 a.m.!”

“I wanted a kiss, among other things.”

“God, you’re such a pervert, Kasey.”

“Yeah, but it’s why you touch yourself and think of me.”

‘Ugh.. Why did I agree to be your dorm mate?”

“Because you always dreamed of being in the same room as me and getting to do naughty things to me in the middle of the night when everyone else was sleeping.”

“Oh, yeah. You know it.”

“That’s another thing I love about you. Your sarcasm.”

“Did you just say you loved me?!”

“Yeah. So what?”

“Eww! I’m switching dorms as soon as I’m out of this bathroom!”

“Thanks, Atric. You can go, then.”

“Kasey.. I didn’t mean it like-”

“Just get out, Atric. I just wanted a kiss, God.”

“Kasey, don’t be like this. You know I’m straight and don’t like you as more then a friend.”

“Whatever. I’ll leave if you don’t wan-”

“Are you happy?”

“Extremely!”

“Wipe that grin off of your face, It was only a peck.”

“Can I have another one?”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pleeeaaase?”

“No.”

“I got you!”

“You’re an asshole.”

“What was that? You’d like for me to give it to you up the asshole? Ok. Come here, beautiful.”

“Get away fro- Mmmm……”

“Told you you’d like it so much you’d want me to do naughty things to you. I see your little friend is coming out to play.”

“Shut up and fuck me, you asshole!”