Midnight Rain

I have always been a cautious person. I have always been unsure of most things. I didn't like not knowing what was going to happen or how it was going to happen. I knew that Uncle Bill was right. Zack was a good guy and I needed to trust him. Could I really trust him with a secret such as mine? I'm not sure how he would react. Mad? Sad? Confused? Depressed? There were possibilities on top of the possibilities.

Breakfast had finished hours ago and lunch was over. Uncle Bill was making hot wings with home made ranch; with some strange sides. I had drawn the conclusion that he loves to cook. He is always in the kitchen. I don't complain; he is good at what he does. I'm standing in front of my window looking at the sky.

The sun was sinking behind some houses and trees. The sky was currently orange and pink with white specks for clouds. In some places it was fading into a black abyss. Some stars were taking the clouds place. It never stopped amazing me about how a rotation could change seasons and figure between day and night.

Sometimes when I go for a walk and if there are trees ,or anything that has to do with nature around me, I always come back home with a million questions I don't understand. Why are the trees leaves on a green color? Why is the trees bark brown? Why do leaves have veins? What compounds make up soil? What makes up those compounds? Is it the cause of evolution or a higher power?

If I knew the answers to those questions life would be bland and uneventful. I think that some things are to remain a mystery no matter the question. I crossed my arms and suddenly wished I had a cup of coffee in my hands; then maybe it would feel like I was a living form of a picture. My cloths had been changed to a pair of yellow boxer shorts with a baggy green shirt that had some saying written on it. I sighed in content and turned around.

My eyes went to the door way. My eyes widened and my breath caught in my throat. I felt my heart beat start going faster. I put my hand between my throat and chest in hope that my breathing would start to be normal again. My organs were trying to untangle themselves but instead of a comforting feeling, all I felt was more pain in my stomach. I felt my body temperature rise. I sat on the bed and finally took a gasp for air. I took a few breaths before I looked at the door.

"Must you scare me like that?" I asked between my binges for air. My heart was slowing back to normal. My organs were rearranging themselves. I ran my finger tips over my temples in hope that the pounding in my head would go away. I hadn't noticed a pain in my head until my mini attack.

"Are you alright?" Brian asked as he sat next to me on the edge of the bed. If I hadn't taken my medicine I would have clawed out his eyes like I had done years ago. I felt Brian rub small circles in my back and I smiled at him as if saying thank you. Yeah, he really needed a thank you for nearly killing me.

"I'm fine now." I said after a medium pause. I turned to Brian and smiled. His skin was more tan then I remember it being from our last meeting. His hair was spiked up and he had on a pair of lime green board shorts that had black Hawaiian flowers on them. He had on a black Motley Crue tank top. I knew it used to be a shirt before he tore off the sleeves. It was obvious at the seems. I kept my opinion about his bad 'newer shirt making' to myself. Then I realized that he had came over for me obviously. "Oh that's right." I said lightly smacking my forehead and laughed a bit. "Was there something you needed?" The question struck fear through me. It ran through my veins. I could never be sure the answer at all any more. I was in slight fear of what he would say.

"Oh I just came to check up on you." Brian said with a snort. He laughed and crossed his arms. "I haven't seen you since Friday; thought I'd come investigate your absence from me." Brian said in a fake British accent. I laughed and let my mouth hang open before I shut it and shook my head.

"You are one crazy jackass." I told him as I looked at my leg. Since I moved to California my skin tone has changed. It wasn't the milk white that it used to be. I was starting to get some color. Granted it wasn't much but it was some to say the least. I looked up at Brian and his eyes seemed browner then normal. It could have just been the lighting in my room. I never liked bright lighting so my room, I had made sure, was dimly lit.

"Yeah, I guess I am." He mumbled. He looked over my walls. I had added some of my old drawings. I had my drawling of the cross, sun rises, sun sets and some of elderly people in the park. I had a good hand and I embraced it as often as I could. "You are an amazing artist Amanda." Brian said looking at the picture of the elderly gentlemen with his old wife of fifty six years. His name was Robert and her name was Ellen.

"It's a name named Robert and his wife Ellen. They were married for fifty six years. As far as I know they're still alive and happily married." I said with a short sigh. How could someone be with someone else for so long and still be, very much, in love? I didn't understand it. "Do you think love like theirs still exist?" I asked Brian as I gazed up at the framed drawling. He was holding her as her red lips were stretched over her fake teeth. They both had beautiful Russian accents and their heritage showed in their attire and appearance.

Brian looked at me and smiled. "I heard about you and Zack." Brian said with a smile on his face. He seemed happy. But why? Was he going to ignore the question? "You're in a relationship with an amazing guy. Now it's up to you to see if you can create the love that Robert and Ellen have. Remember that a relationship is build on trust. You can trust Zack with all of your secretes. Believe me, I know. He is a very understanding guy." Brian said standing up and stretching his arms over his head. I stood with him and started to crack my knuckles. With every small move my body made something cracked.

Brian had his body out of my door way and he turned to me with a small smile. "Zack is a very good guy." He said as our eyes locked. His were a deep brown. I hadn't ever seen his eyes that shade of brown before. Maybe they changed color according to his mood? I could have to figure it out myself. "He wants more then just sex. Just so you know." That was the last words out of Brian's mouth before he left; shutting my door quietly behind him.

I sat on the edge of my bed running my temples with my finger tips. In one day two people have told me that Zack is a good guy. My Uncle has known him for years so I think that his opinion is worth trusting. He hasn't lied to me yet. Granted people change or time; so is there a possibility that he could be deathly wrong? Then there was Brian Haner. I have only known him for a week and a few days. I don't know much about him but he seems trust worthy. Well, he is Zack's friend. Could that have something to do with his opinion?

Brian and Uncle Bill's statements were my shelter from the rain. I had nothing else to go on but trust them. What would Brian, or Zack, think of me after I tell them my secrete? Should I? Could I? I can't lie to Zack; it seems like it goes against nature for me. If he asks I know I'll tell him or run. I know that running form your problems cause more problems but what could I do in this case?

"Amanda." My Uncle Bill said in a cheerful tone. From the distance of his voice my assumption is that he is standing on the center of the stares. He never comes to my door to tell me things. He normally calls from the stares. Thank God for that. "Dinner's ready." Even with the distance you could tell he was satisfied with his cooking. You could add as much foundation as you'd like and you could still hear it.

Sighing I got up. I knew that I just had to keep their words in mind. I walked towards the door and ushered myself to the kitchen. I greeted Uncle Bill with a soft smile. On the inside I was screaming. Could he hear it?