Bite Me
Should I Stay Or Should I Go
(Pete's POV)
I walked into the hospital and found Amanda’s room. It was like instinct. I didn’t have to ask. I put my hand on the door to push it open. I was nervous and scared. I wondered how bad she really was or even if she wanted to speak to me.
I walked in to find Amanda sleeping and Patrick trying to sleep in a chair. The only light was shining through the door from the hallway. I walked over to Amanda to find Patrick getting up.
“What are you doing here? Amanda told me she didn’t want you here, Pete. I have to respect her wishes.” Patrick said standing behind me and talking in a whisper.
“How long has she been asleep?” I asked.
“Not long. The medicines kicked in after she came to and has helped ease some pain. The doctor said she has some bruised and cracked ribs. Her face is bruised and swollen and they thought she may have bled some internally. Brendon was lucky to find her when he did. Now you have to leave before she wakes up.” Patrick said now standing beside Amanda’s bed.
She went through something I can’t fix. At least sleeping she looks peaceful. “Patrick, please just give me a few minutes. I just want to watch her breathe and see that she is ok myself. I won’t wake her I promise and then I will leave.” I said to Patrick.
“Five minutes and I will be out in the hall.” He said turning the light on above the empty bed beside Amanda’s.”
“Thank you.” I said watching him leave and shut the door behind him.
“Well, I did this didn’t I?” I said whispering to Amanda. “I wish I could change what I did and said earlier but I can’t and you had to pay for my stupid mistake. I hope you can forgive me eventually. I would like to start over if you will still have me in your life.” I said listening to her breathe.
Amanda was breathing a little funny but that was to be expected from her ribs probably poking her lungs. Her face is so bruised and swollen. And I see a bandage covering the wound I made on her neck. I went to touch the bandage lightly only to have my hand twisted around so fast I hollered in pain.
“Don’t touch me!” I saw Amanda turn and say letting go of my hand. “What are you doing here bothering me? Get out!” She said wincing in pain as she tried to sit up.
“Take it easy, Amanda. Don’t hurt yourself because of me.” I said backing away from her.
“Where’s Patrick? I told him not to let you in.” She said lying back breathing slowly.
“I told him to give me just five minutes. I thought you would sleep and I wasn’t going to bother you.” I said ready for whatever she was going to say next.
“Well, my reflexes are sharp and I was sleeping peacefully I may add until I sensed you trying to touch me.” She said looking away from me.
“Amanda, I am so sorry and I know that is not enough to ask for you to forgive me. I should have grabbed your hand. I should have just stayed with you and trusted you. I just couldn’t handle it if I hurt you and what I thought was doing right turned out hurting you instead. I will find Beckett.” I said reassuring her.
“You are right. Sorry isn’t enough. Pete you shouldn’t have come here. I can’t stand to be around you or see your face right now. I’m fine and I will be fine but leave me alone. What I am trying to say is I don’t ever want to see you again and I wish I never met you that night.” Amanda said so coldly.
“But I don’t understand. I thought we could start over.” I said to her slowly approaching her bed.
“I can’t be with or around someone who doesn’t trust me or runs from their problems. I was starting to fall for you Pete. I’d do anything for you. All I asked was for you not to jump but to come to me and talk about what happened. We can’t ever have a relationship. You aren’t meant to. You aren’t meant for me. I was stupid to let my feelings get in the way again. I’ve been hurt too many times. This time I am the one walking away. I choose my own path. You aren’t in it. If we happen to be out in the same area slaying also, don’t cross my path. Goodbye, Pete. Please leave me, now.” She said with hurt in her eyes.
“Do you really mean you wish you never met me?” I asked her.
“Yes.” She said.
That was all I needed to hear. My life I was working on getting better was gone. I was nothing without her in it. I walked out of the room and let Patrick back in. I stood against the wall of her room letting it all sink in what she had said. She gave me so many chances. I was just blind to see them.
I walked into the hospital and found Amanda’s room. It was like instinct. I didn’t have to ask. I put my hand on the door to push it open. I was nervous and scared. I wondered how bad she really was or even if she wanted to speak to me.
I walked in to find Amanda sleeping and Patrick trying to sleep in a chair. The only light was shining through the door from the hallway. I walked over to Amanda to find Patrick getting up.
“What are you doing here? Amanda told me she didn’t want you here, Pete. I have to respect her wishes.” Patrick said standing behind me and talking in a whisper.
“How long has she been asleep?” I asked.
“Not long. The medicines kicked in after she came to and has helped ease some pain. The doctor said she has some bruised and cracked ribs. Her face is bruised and swollen and they thought she may have bled some internally. Brendon was lucky to find her when he did. Now you have to leave before she wakes up.” Patrick said now standing beside Amanda’s bed.
She went through something I can’t fix. At least sleeping she looks peaceful. “Patrick, please just give me a few minutes. I just want to watch her breathe and see that she is ok myself. I won’t wake her I promise and then I will leave.” I said to Patrick.
“Five minutes and I will be out in the hall.” He said turning the light on above the empty bed beside Amanda’s.”
“Thank you.” I said watching him leave and shut the door behind him.
“Well, I did this didn’t I?” I said whispering to Amanda. “I wish I could change what I did and said earlier but I can’t and you had to pay for my stupid mistake. I hope you can forgive me eventually. I would like to start over if you will still have me in your life.” I said listening to her breathe.
Amanda was breathing a little funny but that was to be expected from her ribs probably poking her lungs. Her face is so bruised and swollen. And I see a bandage covering the wound I made on her neck. I went to touch the bandage lightly only to have my hand twisted around so fast I hollered in pain.
“Don’t touch me!” I saw Amanda turn and say letting go of my hand. “What are you doing here bothering me? Get out!” She said wincing in pain as she tried to sit up.
“Take it easy, Amanda. Don’t hurt yourself because of me.” I said backing away from her.
“Where’s Patrick? I told him not to let you in.” She said lying back breathing slowly.
“I told him to give me just five minutes. I thought you would sleep and I wasn’t going to bother you.” I said ready for whatever she was going to say next.
“Well, my reflexes are sharp and I was sleeping peacefully I may add until I sensed you trying to touch me.” She said looking away from me.
“Amanda, I am so sorry and I know that is not enough to ask for you to forgive me. I should have grabbed your hand. I should have just stayed with you and trusted you. I just couldn’t handle it if I hurt you and what I thought was doing right turned out hurting you instead. I will find Beckett.” I said reassuring her.
“You are right. Sorry isn’t enough. Pete you shouldn’t have come here. I can’t stand to be around you or see your face right now. I’m fine and I will be fine but leave me alone. What I am trying to say is I don’t ever want to see you again and I wish I never met you that night.” Amanda said so coldly.
“But I don’t understand. I thought we could start over.” I said to her slowly approaching her bed.
“I can’t be with or around someone who doesn’t trust me or runs from their problems. I was starting to fall for you Pete. I’d do anything for you. All I asked was for you not to jump but to come to me and talk about what happened. We can’t ever have a relationship. You aren’t meant to. You aren’t meant for me. I was stupid to let my feelings get in the way again. I’ve been hurt too many times. This time I am the one walking away. I choose my own path. You aren’t in it. If we happen to be out in the same area slaying also, don’t cross my path. Goodbye, Pete. Please leave me, now.” She said with hurt in her eyes.
“Do you really mean you wish you never met me?” I asked her.
“Yes.” She said.
That was all I needed to hear. My life I was working on getting better was gone. I was nothing without her in it. I walked out of the room and let Patrick back in. I stood against the wall of her room letting it all sink in what she had said. She gave me so many chances. I was just blind to see them.