Hail Mary
Pray For Us Sinners At The Hour Of Death
In my ghost-like form, I stared at my pale motionless body as doctors and nurses huddled over to me as the EMT’s brought me into the emergency room. My gaze fell on the guys (and girls) who were being held back by a petite sized nurse who had honey brown colored hair that was up in a bun and her scrubs were purple, my favorite color. My twin brother, Zack, was yelling for them to let him pass but the nurse stood her ground. His eyes were blood shot, along with everyone else, from crying.
I could sense the regret from everyone and sadness, especially Brian. He was away from everyone in the back of the room. He was crouched down, leaning his back against the wall with his face buried in his hands. He began to recite the prayer I would always say before I did my shameful doings.
“Hail Mary, Full of Grace…”
After everything that was happening who was I to speak? This was my fault, but I just couldn’t stop. It was such a need to be wanted and I needed to be loved, emotionally and physically.
I was slowly killing myself and little did I know that someone would miss me. Finally making up my mind, I realized that I did, in fact, want to die. I couldn’t stand that fact that everyone blamed themselves for what I had become.
Before I go on allow to me to bring you back to the beginning, back to where and how everything started.
Back to how I became bulimic.
I could sense the regret from everyone and sadness, especially Brian. He was away from everyone in the back of the room. He was crouched down, leaning his back against the wall with his face buried in his hands. He began to recite the prayer I would always say before I did my shameful doings.
“Hail Mary, Full of Grace…”
After everything that was happening who was I to speak? This was my fault, but I just couldn’t stop. It was such a need to be wanted and I needed to be loved, emotionally and physically.
I was slowly killing myself and little did I know that someone would miss me. Finally making up my mind, I realized that I did, in fact, want to die. I couldn’t stand that fact that everyone blamed themselves for what I had become.
Before I go on allow to me to bring you back to the beginning, back to where and how everything started.
Back to how I became bulimic.