Lyrical Love Letter

“Hey,” His voice was quiet, soft, and sullen and it momentarily confused the hospital bound girl. It was nothing she recognized in his voice but as she peered at the lanky, awkward looking boy she knew who it was instantly—it was the only person she cared to see just then. Physically Missy would be fine but a girl doesn’t just get beat by her father and then be okay. The doctors had required her to simply rest a few hours and since everyone was waiting for Jonnie, Missy decided not to be discharged but have the room to herself. Missy didn’t want to be fussed over, she didn’t want to listen to her mother’s excuses for her father, she didn’t want to see the damage her father had inflicted on her cousins. So Missy chose to be alone, claiming she needed her rest.

“Hi,” She smiled softly as she stared at him, frozen in the doorway of her room. “I don’t bite you know.” She added when he still hadn’t moved. Jack glanced down at his red pair of slip on Vans as he rubbed the back of his neck before his feet moved across the linoleum floor to where she was.
Jack sat down quietly in the uncomfortable multicolored chair beside her bed, his eyes carefully trained on her. Missy lost herself in his eyes then, she didn’t understand how this immature, awkward boy had managed to make her heart race unlike any other boy, and she didn’t understand how Jack, over the football team, could make her skin burn with just the brush of his fingers. Missy had never felt this way about any boy and she may have been fifteen but she knew that had to mean something and that scared her. Surely all her friends who proclaimed their love for their boyfriends one week than dump them the next could not have felt this way.

Jack never felt this way about any girl but it scared him for a whole other set of reasons. Jack knew that being around Missy alone was like playing with fire, she was Alex’s cousin for cryin’ out loud. Jack knew Alex would raise hell over it but what scared him more was that was that that fact didn’t affect him like he felt it should. Surely gambling with a friendship wasn’t worth a girl but she wasn’t any girl, she was Missy Taylor and suddenly Jack would pay any price Alex made him.

“I should have been there.” He murmured adverting his eyes to his hands. Missy picked up on the undercurrent of guilt in his voice and it pained her. She didn’t want Jack to feel guilty, to torture himself with ‘what if’s, Missy had never wanted Jack to be hurt by the situation she alone had been placed in.

“You can’t blame yourself for this Jack,” She remarked in surprise. “You can’t protect me from my father.”

“I should have been there for you,” he argued quietly and Missy knew that he had been thinking about the ordeal for a while now.

Missy reached for his hand then and held it securely in both of hers but he still wouldn’t meet her gaze. “You’re here now and that’s what counts. Besides if you had been there you would have been in a hospital bed beside Jonnie and I. I can get past what my father did to me but I could never forgive him for doing this to you.”

“You can forgive him for this?” Jack questioned shocked his eyes flashing up to meet hers. “How the hell could you possible be okay with what happened?” Anger laced his words and it temporarily jarred Missy. She hadn’t expected this from Jack. Never in a million years could Missy imagine this level of maturity and somberness from Jack. It startled her slightly, seeing him this concerned and upset, seeing him this angry and distraught. “Melissa he’s your father and he almost sent you into a coma! How is that remotely in the realm of forgivable acts?”

“Don’t be over dramatic Jack,” She mumbled looking away, her eyes falling to her hands as she picked at her nails. “He didn’t almost send me into a coma.”

“Oh sorry that was Jonnie,” He retorted crossly.

“Get out, Jack.” She seethed, the chill of her voice causing Jack to backtrack. He hadn’t come here to fight, to upset her. He’d come because he cared for her and she was hurting.

“I’m sorry,” He mumbled staring at his lap.

“Whatever, Jack.” Missy snapped crossing her arms and glaring at the corner of the room. “I don’t expect you to understand.”

“What is that suppose to mean?”

“Your parents are happily married. Your mom is amazing and your father is the most family oriented guy I’ve ever met. Your brother is an all around good guy and a perfect brother. Your sister is kind and beautiful—you have the perfect family, I can’t expect you to understand mine.”

Jack bit his lip, he knew if he countered Missy’s words she’d only get angry because they both knew her words are truth. He considered his words carefully, which was not something Jack Barakat did often and when he spoke it was the simplest thing he could have said yet had the greatest impact in the world.

He spoke quietly, sobered by the story of what had brought battered girl before him here. “I hate this place, hospitals make me edgy. They make me sad. Jonnie would have understood if I left but I didn’t stay for her.” Jack’s eyes rose to meet Missy’s who were staring at curiously and guarded, her mouth firmly clasp shut, startled by the quiet, monotone voice of Jack. If this was any other situation Jack would have pointed out that for the first time since he’d known her, Missy Taylor was at a loss of words. “But I stayed. I stayed and Joe and May stayed. We stayed for you. You say my family is perfect but what you’re really saying is that you hate that you feel you can’t have that.” He spoke bravely but the sadness in his voice kept Missy from interrupting him. “But you don’t see it,” He shook his head, smiling almost sadly. “You don’t see that my family, the one you envy, loves you as though you were family.”

“Jack I…” She trailed off, unspoken words falling dead on her lips. Missy didn’t know what to say and in many ways there was nothing to say.

“Don’t,” He shook his head smiling softly at her. “It’s okay.”

The two fell silent, feeling the weight of Jack’s words. Missy reached for his hand and Jack eyed her curiously in response.

“Come here,” She murmured scooting over in her bed. Jack hesitated for only a moment, looking torn. They both knew they were playing with fire, they both knew that eventually there was going to be a slipup to the secrecy but in that moment neither cared. Jack slipped carefully into the hospital bed beside her. He lay motionless, uneasy, Missy had that affect on him. Her very presence made him question everything he did--she made him nervous. But Missy lay her arm across his chest easily, resting her head on his chest and she felt Jack slowly relax under her as she felt his hand go around her, holding Missy to him.

She closed her eyes savoring the moment. In a hospital bed covered in bruises being held by the boy she cared for, Missy Taylor had never been more content with life.