Uh, Yeah. About that.

Bob paced back and forth along the small path in the living area of the bus, which he had been doing for over two hours now. His stomach was a wreck, his throat sore from the repeated visits to the bathroom he’d had to endure. His life had just completely turned to shit, and he didn’t know what to do.

Within the space of five minutes and because of a small blue cross on a white stick, everything changed. Bob didn’t know what to do anymore. He didn’t know how to tell hisboyfriend fiancé, he didn’t know what he was going to do about the band, or anything else in life. This wasn’t supposed to happen yet.

He growled and dragged his hands up his face, putting extra pressure on his eyes so he saw shapes explode in front of them like a kaleidoscope. He huffed and let his hands drop back to his side before flopping down on the couch, only to bounce back up a minute later to bang around in the kitchen area.

“Bob!” Frank whined, stumbling his way into the living room, his nose entirely stuffed up and clogged, his eyes swollen and his throat sore. He coughed and shuffled slowly into the room. “What are you doing?”

Bob’s head jerked up and he swallowed while he rapidly wiped his face free of tears. “Frank, go back to bed.”

Frank coughed into his tissue and leaned heavily against the wall, “I can’t. You’re making too much noise,” he finished with another round of coughing.

“Ah, geez, Frankie, I’m so sorry.” Bob rubbed his eyes again and let out a harsh breath through his teeth. Everything had gotten so overwhelming that he had completely forgotten about Frank.

“Socay, what’s wrong?” Frank asked, shuffling over to sit in the booth by the kitchen.

“Nothing,” Bob said as he, quietly, started making some tea for Frank.

Frank put his head down on the table and pulled his blanket over his head, “You’re a bad liar Bobby, come on. Talk to me.”

Bob chanced a quick glance and crumbled in an instant. He kept making tea though, but making sure his face was down at all times so that Frank couldn’t see his falling tears, he talked. “It’s really nothing.” Frank kept quiet and waited Bob out, he knew that he’d broken and he knew Bob would talk; it was just a matter of time. Not a minute later Bob went on. “I’ve been sick for a few weeks you know? Throwing up and I’ve become sensitive to smells and some foods. I figured it was no big deal or anything, but.” Bob gave a nervous laugh and wiped at some of his tears. “I just, I figured for the sake of things I’d take a test, you know? Just to make sure that wasn’t it.”

Bob bowed his head and wiped at his eyes before suddenly clapping a hand over his mouth and bolting for the door. When he came back he rinsed out his mouth and went back to making the tea. Frank sat up and tilted his head into his hand and sniffed a little, “So then you are. Pregnant, I mean.” Bob nodded and wiped his eyes again before pouring the hot water over tea bags. “Does Mikey know yet?”

Bob shook his head no and brought the mugs over to the table with honey and lemon juice. He slid in across from Frank and passed over his mug, “No, I don’t know how to tell him. I’m half tempted to just leave now and have the baby on my own you know?”

Frank raised an eyebrow and his jaw dropped slightly, “But why?” Bob just half shrugged and stared intently at his cup tears still dripping from his eyes. “No, Bob, why would you do that?”

Bob cleared his throat, but kept his eyes on his mug, “I don’t want to force Mikey into this before he’s ready.”

“How do you know he’s not ready?” Frank asked reaching over to take Bob’s hand.

“He told me, at the party.” Bob sniffed and suddenly collapsed against the table and started sobbing hysterically. “He won’t want it. He… he… he’ll wa-ant me to g-et rid of it!”

“Jesus Christ Bob! What would ever posses you to think that?!” Frank asked. He had been completely stunned from Bob’s outburst. He had no idea where these thoughts were coming from. If anything Mikey had almost killed Frank and Ray when they had been talking about having an abortion with this baby, he had yelled and screamed at them for even thinking about it. So for Bob to even think that Mikey would do that to him was beyond ludicrous and Frank could only imagine it was from all the stress Bob was under right now and the hormones.

“He won’t want it,” Bob choked out, sitting up and wiping his eyes, trying to calm down. “He t-tol-old me at the pa-arty th-at he wa-asn’t r-ready.”

“That was almost four weeks ago Bob! You don’t know how he feels right now!” Frank tried to sooth Bob from a distance, because he knew Bob couldn’t risk getting sick right now. It wasn’t good for the baby for him to get sick. He also tried to keep his coughing down to a minimum so he didn’t upset Bob, but it was getting harder and harder for him. His chest was aching and starting to fill up slowly. It hurt to breathe, but he fought it back so he could be there for his friend. “You know the last thing Mikey would ever do would be to make you get rid of the baby; you know Mikey is against abortion one-hundred and ten percent. No matter what’s happened in the past.”

“Like you sa-aid, th-ings change,” Bob choked out, tears still streaming. “H-he w-wo-on’t wa-ant an-no-other ba-aby yet. I-it’s too soon for him. He’ll wa-ant me to ge-et rid of it.”

Frank opened his mouth to start talking, but he was cut off by a harsh round of coughing. The coughs were deep and wet and sounded horribly painful. Just when he thought he was done and could finally catch his breath, he was thrown into another fit, just as painful, just as deep, just as wet.

The coughing seemed to change something in Bob and, while he still cried, he insisted Frank get to bed. He wasn’t going to hear any lip from the small man, not that he could really give lip coughing like he was, but still. Bob helped Frank to his feet and led him back to the bunk area. He helped him sip at some of the water he had by his bed and rubbed his back until he finally finished coughing. Frank was so weak he went limp against Bob’s side and could scarcely keep his eyes open.

Bob carefully slid out of bed holding onto Frank’s shoulders and then stacked up pillows behind him so that he wasn’t laying flat on his back. Next Bob slid one hand up to cup the back of Frank’s neck and helped slide him up then lay him down in the bed, then lifted his legs and tucked the covers tight around him.

Frank wanted to talk more to Bob, to make him understand that Mikey wasn’t ever going to do the things Bob thought. He wanted to make his friend stop crying tears of fear and sadness and start crying the tears of joy he should be shedding. Frank just wanted to make everything okay, but he just couldn’t, he was simply too weak. The coughing fit had left him drained of all energy.

Bob brushed Frank’s hair out of his face and sighed softly, “Thanks Frank,” he whispered before getting up and leaving the young man to sleep. As Bob took a seat on the couch he realized, he would just have to figure this out, on his own.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Ray came back about an hour or so after Frank’s cough attack and waddled in slowly. He kicked off his shoes and sighed softly running a hand over his stomach and back at the same time. He sighed again and moved his way towards the figure on the couch. He smiled at Bob and slowly draped a blanket over the supposedly sleeping man then shuffled his way towards the back room to check on his sick husband.

Ray slowly lowered himself onto the bunk and smiled at the man he loved so much. He was pale and sweaty, but Ray didn’t see that. Ray saw what he always saw, he saw a beautiful man that radiated love. Ray reached up and brushed Frank’s sweat soaked hair from his eyes and stroked his cheek.

Frank’s eyes fluttered open weakly and a tiny smile graced his lips, “Hey,” he croaked out weakly.

“Hey baby, how are you?” Ray asked still stroking his cheek softly.

“Alive.”

Ray chuckled and moved to press a kiss to his clammy forehead. “That’s always a good thing, hmmm?” Frank nodded and closed his eyes again, his smile never leaving his lips. “What have you been doing while our friends forced me on a baby shopping spree?”

Frank laughed a little, but it made his chest hurt and his coughing start again, so he stopped it as soon as he could. Once he had settled down again, after Ray helped him sip at the water again, he opened his eyes again and looked at Ray seriously. “Bob’s pregnant.”

“Really? That’s awesome!” Ray said grinning even more, but Frank shook his head no. “Why not?”

“He’s afraid.” Frank coughed a little and sighed, “Afraid Mikey will make him get rid of it.”

“What?” Ray gasped looking over his shoulder towards where he thought Bob slept then back at Frank. “Why?”

“I don’t know. Something’s wrong, but. I tried talking to him. I started coughing real bad. Ray you gotta. Gotta make him see sense.” Frank’s voice was insistent, urgent even, though still so weak. “He wanted. Wanted to leave, and… and have the baby on his own.”

“That would kill Mikey!” Ray gasped.

“I know! You gotta talk to him.” Frank had to stop talking because of yet another coughing fit that left him weak and breathless.

“Yeah, okay. I will. I promise, baby you just sleep okay? You have to get better you know. Our baby will be here soon, you don’t want to have to meet it in a mask do you?” Frank laughed again and shook his head no. “Okay, then sleep. I promise I’ll get to him.” Ray pressed another kiss to Frank’s forehead and pulled his blanket up around his shoulders. “I love you.”

“Love you more than honey.” Frank replied.

Ray smiled at the old saying they had shared between them, their own little secret saying. He pressed one last kiss to Frank’s head before getting up and waddling back towards the living room area. Ray watched Bob carefully for a few moments then started shaking at him to wake him up.

Bob didn’t even bother to feign sleep any longer. He let his eyes fall open and settle on Ray’s worried face. He didn’t need to say much to the other man; he could tell Ray knew everything. He actually didn’t really know what to say, and so, he settled on, “I’m sorry.”

Ray sighed and pushed at him to make him sit up then lowered himself down next to the other man once he had sat up. He quickly wrapped an arm around Bob’s shoulders and pulled him in close, “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

Bob let himself get pulled into Ray’s side and willingly rested his head on the guitarists shoulder with a stifled hiccup-sob. “I don’t know what to do,” he choked out.

“You do know what to do Bob. You tell Mikey. You damn well know Mikey would be the last man on earth to ever make you, or even suggest you, give up the baby. I think he’d rip off his own balls before he did that.” Ray said as sharply as he could without being mean.

Bob just sobbed harder and nodded before forcing out, “I know.”

Ray nodded and kept doing whatever he could think of to help calm Bob down; he knew most of this was just the new imbalance of hormones in his body, because Bob wasn’t the type to cry. He well remembered his first few months of each of his pregnancies, the current one even more so. He had cried at the drop of a dime, so he didn’t judge, that wasn’t what he was there for anyway. He was there to calm and to sooth and most of all, he was there to just be a friend.

After a few moments Bob pulled away and wiped his eyes weakly and Ray just waited for him to go on. He knew there was a story behind Bob’s worries; he just had to wait it out. Eventually Bob had gathered himself enough to be able to talk once more.

“It happened at the party. At Olive Garden last month. I knew then really, when we left. I felt it, but.” Bob stopped and shook his head. He sighed and went on. “I asked Mikey, told him really, that I was ready to try again. I was. Holding David, it just. I was ready, I am ready, but Mikey. He wanted to wait, couple more months at least. I didn’t know then, when I asked. I mean, we had, you know, but I didn’t know yet. It was later. Right before we left. I went into the bathroom and when I was washing my hands, I felt it. I felt that spark and I just knew. I half hoped I was wrong, but then I got sick and everything. I just knew and now.” Bob had to stop talking. Not because he was crying again, but simply because he just couldn’t go on. Nothing was coming out right anyway, none of it really made sense to him.

Ray got it though. Ray understood exactly what Bob had said. He got it. When they were all at that party at Olive Garden, a sort of, birthday party for Brian, Mikey and Bob had ‘hooked up’ so to speak and Bob had gotten pregnant. He also understood that Bob had told Mikey he wanted to try for another baby, but that Mikey just wasn’t ready. In Ray’s eyes, there really wasn’t much they could do about it now. The deed was done, the baby conceived. All that was left now was to face the coming months together.

Ray took Bob’s hand in his and stroked the back with his thumb while he spoke, “Bob, you know. There’s no going back, you can’t take back making a baby. You two made the decision that night to have unprotected sex, knowing full well what could happen, and it did. Mikey isn’t going to leave you or make you give it up. Sure he might be scared shitless, but, he’ll be okay. I know he will. He’ll be there for you, because he does want kids. He may have liked to take a little more time healing, but, that’s too late now. The truth of the matter is there’s a baby on the way now and you can’t do this by yourself and Mikey has the right to know. So just man up and tell him, or I’ll be forced to.”

Bob laughed a little and looked up at Ray. He nodded and then engulfed Ray in a huge hug, “Thanks Ray.”

“Anytime man. Now, I am going to stretch out and watch stupid kid movies. You wanna join me?” Ray asked with his wide, warm smile.

Bob shook his head and yawned, “No, I’ma nap. When Mikey gets in will you have him wake me?”

Ray nodded, “Yeah, sure. Don’t forget that Brian’s coming over in a bit for the meeting about if we’re going to stay on tour after I give birth or not. Which I know you wanted to, but…”

Ray didn’t need to finish his sentence, Bob knew what he meant. He just nodded and said, “Yeah, yeah. I’ll talk to Mikey. Just have him wake me.” Ray waved and Bob went back to lay down.

As Bob drifted off to sleep, he did so with a smile on his face. He was going to have a baby. He was finally happy.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Mikey shook Bob awake with the world’s biggest smile on his face. He bent down and kissed Bob then shook him again and called his name until Bob opened his bright blue eyes. “Hey babe, we just got back. You have got to see all this stuff we got for the baby. I know Ray said you wanted to talk, but can it wait? Bri’s here and it’s time for the meeting.” Bob opened his mouth to talk and Mikey was just so hyper he just bent down and kissed him quick, “Good, come on.”

“Mikey! Wai…” Bob didn’t even get a chance to tell Mikey he really needed to talk to him, before the man was out of the door. Bob shook his head and slowly dragged himself from his bunk and outside. He tried to get Mikey alone for a second, but the man was just so hyper he didn’t have the chance and before he knew it they were all sitting down for the meeting.

Brian didn’t waste any time he just got right to the point, “So, are you going on tour or not?”

Gerard and Mikey both nodded and Mikey said, “Yeah, well, we were talking about it and Bob and myself certainly want to go on. “

Bob opened his mouth to speak, but Gerard just butted in, “Yeah and you know me. I live to be on the road and everything so I’m game.”

“Okay then,” Brian said getting to his feet. “I’ll start looking for subs then.”

“You’ll have to find one for me too,” Bob said, finally being able to get a word in and taking his chance. Everybody turned to look at him.

“I thought we talked about this?” Mikey asked looking at him weirdly. “What changed?”

Bob looked around the circle and swallowed a little, his eyes ended on Mikey. He stared at him for a moment before just saying it, “I uh… I got pregnant since then.”

Everybody went still.