A Messed-Up Heart

Each passing day was extremely hard for me to deal with, just knowing that I was one day closer to losing Kevin forever. It was scary knowing that by early September, there was a chance that I could lose the only boy I ever loved when he decided to marry Allison. I did everything I could in order to keep that from happening, to keep myself from worrying about such a possibility, throwing myself into my writing. The editing process was nearing its completion, and I was then going to have my book sent off to hopefully get published. For that, for even giving me this opportunity to publish my book, I had Kevin to thank.

No matter what Allison may have wanted, it seemed as if Kevin was always going to be a part of my life. When Kevin was the one to insist that I even send my book out to an agent in the first place, it was evident that Allison was not going to get her way, ultimately keeping me and Betsy out of the Jonas family’s life forever. That just couldn’t happen. Plus, when Allison decided to read the dedication I planned on writing to accompany this book, I knew perfectly well that Allison was going to flip. Allison would never want a book in her house that was written by me, even if the dedication of this book was to be to Betsy and Kevin. They were the two people I loved most in the world, two people that I never wanted to lose. There was nothing I wouldn’t do, nothing I wouldn’t give to keep Kevin and my younger sister in my life. I couldn’t and wouldn’t lose them.

My reasons for protecting Betsy were really quite simple: she was my younger sister and I would anything in order to help her. And, even though Betsy and I were never very close prior to having met the Jonas Brothers, I was always going to care for my younger sister, no matter what happened. That was why Betsy was still out in California at the moment, because I cared about my younger sister way too much. All I wanted for Betsy was to see her happy, to see Betsy get the chance to pursue her dreams. That, of course, could never happen, not so long as Allison and Zora were around and trying to ruin our lives.

With Kevin, I had a completely different problem to deal with. I loved him. And, normally when you loved someone, it was best to let that person go. There was absolutely no way in hell that I was ever willing to let Kevin go, not when Allison was never going to let me go anywhere near him. The fact of the matter was that Allison hated my guts. As a result, I would never willingly give up Kevin, particularly when I knew that I’d never see him again. My promise to Kevin prevented me from ever seeing him again, from ever spending time with the boy I loved and would give anything in order to see again.

Unfortunately, there was really no possible way for me to know what was going to happen, whether what I wanted was actually going to occur. I wanted to forget. I needed to forget. Of course, there was no way that I could though. The feelings I for Kevin were just way too strong. Plus, Kevin loved me back, at least to a certain extent. Despite the fact that he might not be showing it, I knew that somewhere deep inside, the feelings Kevin had for me were still there. But, with Allison around, those feelings would never surface, never be around again. Not to mention that, but I could never see him again either. There was a sickening feeling that went along with knowing that, in knowing that I was never again going to get to see the boy that I would always love, always care about.

The only thing I wanted more than my book to get published was to once again be in Kevin’s arms, to be dating Kevin. I also wanted to see Betsy get back together with Joe. Jetsy was the one relationship that I wanted to see more than Kevanda; Betsy and Joe were so good together. Of course, the moment that Kevin decided he was going to start dating Allison, all chance of that happening went down the drain. That and the existence of Betsy’s hot guy list caused Jetsy to break up. I wanted to see them back together and would do everything in my power to see to it that Jetsy was ultimately reunited. I wanted to see them back together, just as I wanted to be back with Kevin, back with the boy I loved.

I sighed heavily as I was putting the finishing touches on editing my novel when my phone rang. “Hello?” I asked, wondering who it was and what was going on right now.

“Thank God I reached you,” Demi said in a huff. “Amanda, we have a problem. We have a very serious problem that must be dealt with or else Betsy is going to lose Joe for good.”

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

‘It’s Joe. He’s starting to show the same signs of what happened to Kevin. We need to stop it, Amanda; we need to stop it before Joe gets to be the same way as Kevin. If we just let all of this go, I’m sure of the fact that this is going to become a double wedding, causing you both to lose your respective Jonas boys. It’s starting to look as if this was always the girls’ intention; they always intended on marrying Kevin and Joe in order to keep you and Betsy away from them. You’re already losing Kevin; Betsy at least had a chance of getting back together with Joe. Now though, with Zora trying to pressure him into marriage, there’s a chance that Betsy could lose Joe as well,” Demi explained to me.

As soon as I heard about that, I knew exactly what had to be done. I had to talk to Joe about what he was doing. “Demi, go get Joe and insist that he sit in front of the webcam. I need to talk with him; I need to speak with him about what he’s doing, what he’s trying to gain by ignoring Betsy, despite her lingering feelings for him. I’m trying to get them back together. If I can’t be with Kevin, Betsy should at least be happy with Joe. So, get him in front of the webcam. Maybe I can convince him to not propose to Zora, but rather get back together with Betsy. Zora Amanda Crenshaw is not about to take Joe away from my younger sister. There’s no way in hell that that I would ever let that happen.

“Sure,” Demi agreed. “Give me five minutes.”

The call ended and, as I got the webcam ready, I wondered if Betsy and I would ever get the happy ending we were each after. Was such a thing ever going to happen? Unfortunately, there was really no way of knowing was going to happen, what the future was going to hold for each of us. Most people understood what we were each faced with, what we had to deal with. Nick did. Frankie did. Their parents did. The only ones that didn’t understand what was going on and didn’t really seem to care were Joe and Kevin, despite the fact that they were the ones that needed to care about what was going on with me and Betsy.

Pretty soon, Joe appeared in front of the webcam. Demi was there as well. I nodded in acknowledgement. “Thanks, Demi. I appreciate you doing this for me. Now, if you don’t mind, I need you to go talk with Nick. Either that, or bring my sister over there. I have an idea as to a way that we might be able to fix all of this.” There was an idea forming in my head, a way that I might be able to fix what Allison and Zora had done. It was based on something that I had heard from Betsy: the fact that Betsy hadn’t spoken with Joe since early January. Based on Betsy’s account of what was going on in California, she on ever had scenes with Nick or Kevin in JONAS. Never Joe though. So, I would need to test a theory of mine. I needed to determine if the hypnosis affected Joe to the point where he forgot about my sister. Maybe if I knew that, I could figure out a way to deal with the fact that Kevin had completely forgotten about whom I was and my relationship with him.

“I’ll see what I can do,” Demi said.

“Thanks,” I said.

“No problem,” she replied.

Once Demi left, I turned my attention to convincing Joe that marrying Zora would not be a good idea. There was definitely something going on with Zora, just as there was definitely something going on with Allison. From the beginning, I had always known that Allison was bad news. It was not just because she was dating Kevin though; she knew things that she shouldn’t. The same thing had to be going on with Zora. I was quite sure of that. From the looks of it, Allison’s and Zora’s presence in the boys’ lives was destroying the boys’ music career. It wasn’t right. “Joe, do you know a girl named Betsy or Lizard?” I asked.

“No,” Joe said.

I rolled my eyes. Knew it, I thought. The hypnosis was used on him too. There’s no other explanation as to why he would forget about my younger sister. That’s why Joe broke his promise to me. That’s why he wasn’t spending time with Betsy as I asked him to. I sighed heavily, knowing what had to be done. “Joe, do you love Zora?” I asked the middle Jonas.

“With all of my heart,” Joe replied.

“No!” I yelled.

Joe looked rather confused at me. “Why? Do you have a problem with that?” Joe asked me. “Because no one in my family hates her. Everyone I know absolutely adores Zora.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Joe,” I told him, remembering what I was told about everyone’s opinions regarding Zora. They were the same about Zora as they were with Allison. Not that Joe was ever going to realize that. “See, Joe the thing is that no one in your family likes Zora Amanda Crenshaw. They all hate her: Nick, Frankie, your parents, your friends. No one seems to like her very much. As for Kevin, he couldn’t care less about who you date; he’s too busy with Allison to care about the fact that you’re dating Zora. See, the thing is that you ignore those whose opinions conflict with your own. That’s not right, Joe. You’re supposed to take into account your brother’s opinions and not date someone they don’t like. Joe, you’re supposed to be dating my sister. At least she was someone that your family liked.” There was absolutely no way in hell that I was about to let Zora ruin my sister’s chances of dating Joe again. I wanted them back together.

“Your sister?” Joe asked.

I nodded. “Yeah. Before you dated Zora, it was my younger sister that you dated. Of course, when you started dating Zora, her influence in your life made your forget about my sister, a girl who, despite the fact that you broke up with her, still loves you, who still cares for you. I’m telling you Joe, Betsy is so much better for you. She loves you and everyone in your family loves her. Just go back to dating my sister,” I told Joe with a sigh.

“And break up with Zora?” Joe asked.

I nodded. “Yeah.”

“Any particular reason?” Joe asked.

“Yeah,” Betsy said. “I love you.”

When I saw that Demi and Betsy were in the house, I smiled knowing that my sister had gotten back into the Jonas home, back near the boy that she loved while I was in New York, three thousand miles away from the boy that I was still in love with. The fact of the matter was that I knew that I knew Betsy’s appearance at the Jonas home could ultimately bring about the result we wanted. It could help us to realize what might be able to stop the hypnosis. It might be able to tell me a way to bring Kevin back to normal, back to the way I wanted him. Then, with Allison out of Kevin’s life, I might be able to go back to California, back to spending time with the people I cared about. I would just have to Joe, when he heard Betsy’s voice, looked over. From what I could tell, the hypnosis was starting to wear off, as if my younger sister’s voice had caused the hypnosis to dissipate. “Hey, Lizard,” Joe said once he saw that Betsy was in the house with Demi.

Betsy looked shocked. “You remember me?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Joe asked.

“Long story,” Betsy and I said.

“What’s going on?” Joe asked.

“How about if I tell you?” Zora suggested. “Betsy was never supposed to be here. You were never supposed to see your dear ex-girlfriend ever again. You’re my boyfriend, not hers. Just as Amanda is Kevin’s ex, Betsy is yours. You shouldn’t be spending so much time with your exes. That’s why Betsy was banned from this house. That’s why Amanda is no longer in California, so as to give me and Allison what we wanted: you and Kevin.”