These Bright Lights Have Always Blinded Me

I had to friggen walk home since I Craig had dropped me off but, standing on Chelsea’s porch I decided to call Craig to see if he was to drunk to drive.

“Hey Baby,” Craig said right away.

“Hey come get me please Monte wants me home to do something and I don’t want to walk,” I said as the wind blew, “Fuck!” yeah it was cold.

“Yeah I will but what’s wrong?” he asked a little concerned.

“Its cold hun,” I laughed.

“I will be there in one minute I’m not that far from Chelsea’s,” he said before hanging up.

I saw his car pull up and I ran over to him, “Thank you,” I said kissing his cheek.

“Is that all I get?” he asked laughing.

“No,” I laughed, “now please take me home.”

“Okay get in,” he said and I rounded the front of the car and got in the passenger seat. When we got to the house Craig had his arms wrapped around my waist as we walked up to the door.

“Baby I got to clean so I can leave again,” I said as he was kissing my neck.

“I don’t want you to leave,” he said facing me towards him.

“Why?” I said putting my hands on his chest.

“I just want to hold you in my arms and watch scary movies with you,” he smiled.

“Really?” I asked looking at him funny.

“No, I just want to fuck you all night till I can’t move and I’m so sweaty its like I just got out of the shower.”

“What else?” I asked while laughing.

“Then I would tell you to open that pretty little mouth of yours,” he said kissing me, “And tell you to suck my dick.”

“I like the scary movies idea better,” I laughed.

“But baby,” he laughed.

“Haha you wish,” I laughed beginning to walk away.

“Ali,” he said pulling back to him, “I want you to stay here with me,” he said holding my hand.

“What else?” I said smiling and grabbing his other hand.

“Whatever you want me to do,” he smiled before kissing me.

“You don’t have to do anything but hold me and I will be happy.”

“You are a suck up,” he said picking me up and carrying me to the living room and sat me on the couch before putting in Final Destination.

He flopped down in the reclined across the room from me and I just looked over and stared at him.

“What are you doing?” he laughed walking over to me.

“I thought you were going to sit with me,” I said pouting.

“What do you say?” he said as I laid back on the couch.

“I don’t know,” I laughed as he crawled on top of me.

“What do you want?” he smiled kissing my forehead.

“I want you to hold me,” I laughed. I couldn’t take him seriously he made me happy and I was hoping it was real.

“How do you want me to hold you?” he asked.

“However you want,” I said as he roll so his back was on the back frame of the couch and he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me as close as he could and squeezed the air out of me.

“Craigie to tight,” I said trying to loosen his arms.

“Like the first time we had sex, imagine how my dick felt,” he laughed.

“That wasn’t my fault,” I laughed, “Maybe yours shouldn’t be so huge,” I said kissing him deeply.

“Blame my parents,” he said breaking the kiss then kissing me again.

“Craig,” I said pushing him back.

“You didn’t call me Craigie,” he said sitting up so he let go of me, “What did I say?” he asked getting worried.

“Nothing,” I smiled.

“Promise?” he asked straddling my hips.

“Yes,” I said before his lips crashed into mine. Next thing you know he is fumbling with my belt. I had no idea why I wore one that day. He gave up on that and started messing with my white Transformers shirt. He got that off with ease the started kissing down my neck as I undid his pants. Just then I felt cold water all over my body.

“What the fuck?!” Crag said standing up as his pants fell.

“Oops,” Max said looking all innocent.

“Fuck you!” I said grabbing my shirt and walking upstairs to my room. I locked the door and looked for Leila. I walked over to the balcony and to the bathroom then to her crib where she was sound asleep. I forgot Robert probably did that after they got back from ice cream.

“Why can’t you be happy for her?!” I heard Monte yell at Max or I supposed.

“He is too old for her,” Max said to Monte.

“That is not your decision,” I started crying and crawled up in a ball on my bed. They continued yelling and I wanted it to stop. I didn’t want Max to leave and I didn’t want him to be mad at me. I weighed my options before walking downstairs.

“Craig’s had sex with her,” Max said pointing at Craig in his boxers.

“And Ali is over 16,” he said saying I had a right to have sex.

“But Craig is over 18 that is statutory rape,” max said as I began to cry more knowing what I had to do.

“Who cares!? She is 18,” Monte said throwing his hands in the air.

“I do!” I said standing in the middle of all them in my jeans and a bra I didn’t care, “Craig we are over,” I said crying more, “Are you happy Max?” I said looking at him.

“No,” he said looking at me.

“Well neither am I,” I said walking back up the stairs and turned to see Chelsea in the door was downstairs, “And fuck you guys all of you,” I said storming off to my room and locking the door.

I walked over to my closet and got out my sleeping bag and took it to the balcony and laid it down. I walked over to my bed and got a pillow then walked back a set it down. I found the keys to the balcony. I unlocked my door figuring somebody would be there and walked to the balcony and locked it from the outside with the key and left it in. Hoping it would stay locked. Which, it did the last time.

I heard my bedroom door open and saw Max walk in, “Ali?” he asked looking around. I was snuggled in my sleeping bag watching him walk around my room before he saw me, “Ali I am sorry,” he said trying to open the door.

“Don’t talk to me,” I said rolling over to see my phone light up.

Craig: Ali I love you.

Me: I love you too but I cant do this I don’t want to loose Max.

Craig: I understand.

He said that and I didn’t write back.

“Ali!” he said hitting the frame of the door knock the keys out as they hit me in my face, “Are you going to talk to me?” he asked opening the door.

“Max you know how much I love you right?” I asked sitting up.

“Like a brother yes.”

“Just because I didn’t want you to leave I gave up what I loved most,” I said standing up and facing away from him.

“Well, he is too old for you,” I could tell by his voice he shrugged somewhere in there.

“You are older than Craig! Chelsea is only a year older than me!”

“It’s not the same!” he said and I turned to him.

I opened my mouth to talk when Leila started crying, “Mommy?” she cried out.

“Hold on sweetheart,” I said looking past Max then looking at him again, “Why couldn’t you be happy that for once I was happy,” I said walking of to Leila.

“Mommy okay?” she asked extending her arms to me.

“Yeah,” I looked over at Max, “Do you want to break the news to her or do I have to do that to?” I asked picking her up.

“Stop being a bitch,” he said before walking out of the room.

“Leila you can’t call me mommy anymore,” I said rubbing my nose with hers.

“Why?” she asked squeezing my cheeks together.

“Me and daddy broke up,” I said beginning to cry.

“But I can still call you that,” she said wiping my tears.

“I would love for you to,” I smiled.

“Why don’t you go see Uncle Gee mommy?” she asked, “I will go to.”

“Okay we will go,” I said carrying her to the downstairs.

“Where are you going with my daughter?” Craig yelled at me. He was pissed because I did what I thought was right. Hell I would be to.

“We are just going out for a bit,” I said looking down as he walked up to me. I didn’t want to see the hurt in his eyes.

“That is my daughter. You are not taking her anywhere,” he said calming down but still being loud.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered before setting Leila down. I knew he was pissed but I didn’t know how far he would take it.

“I can’t believe I was going to ask you to marry me,” he said in my face and everybody stopped what they were doing. Max and Monte were cleaning up the water mess and they just stopped and looked up to see my reaction. I heard a vase crash on the floor.

“Why are you being like this?” I said crying and looking up at him.

“Because I actually fucking care about you and I thought you cared about me,” he said looking down at me. I saw the hurt in his eyes and I wanted to die.

“Craig I-I,” I began.

“I don’t want to hear it,” he said walking away leaving me standing there with Leila clinging to my leg.

“I love you,” I said as he turned to look at me.

“I thought you did,” he said before turning away.

Leila let go of my leg and ran to her dad, “I do love you,” I said before grabbing his coat and walking outside.

“What did I do?” I heard Max say.

I called Craig's phone after I got far enough from the house, “What?!” he asked when I answered.

“Craig, I want you to know I do love you with every inch on my life,” I began when he stopped me.

“Then why did you dump me just because of what Max thought?” he asked as I kept walking.

“I don’t want to loose him," I said as another phone call was coming in, “Chelsea is calling baby I will be home soon and we can talk I promise,” I said.

“Ali?” he said softly.

“Yeah?” I asked.

“Will you marry me?”

“Craigie,” I began.

“You called me Craigie again,” I could tell he was smiling.

“Yes but not for a while,” I said hanging up.

I missed Chelsea’s call but I called her back.

“Hello?” she said.

“You called?” I said moving the hair out of my face.

“Yeah,” she said before sighing.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing just I want to know what’s going on with you and Max.”

“It’s not my place Chelsea. I am home I’m going to talk to Craig and I will see you in the morning.”

“Okay,” she said hanging up.

I walked in the door and ran straight to my room and Craig was right there and he pulled me into a hug, “I’m so sorry. I just got mad and went off. I don’t ever want to loose you,” he said kissing me.

“Craig we need to sit and talk,” I said walking over to the bed when he let go of me.

“Do you want to stay together regardless of Max?” he asked lifting my chin up as he was standing in front of me. I shook my head and he smiled.

“I just don’t want him to leave.”

“He has no where to go don’t worry about it.”

“Craigie,” I said looking up at him.

“What baby?” he asked running a hand through my hair.

“You know I would do anything for you right?”

“Ali I know. You have nothing to prove to me.”

“I wasn’t going to prove anything. I just wanted to make sure you knew,” I looked over at the clock to see it was three in the morning, “I’m going to bed,” I said throwing his jacket on the couch in my room.

“Is there anything you want?” he asked before lifting the sheets up for me and walking to the door about to leave.

“I want you to lay with me a hold me tight so I know I am yours,” I said as he turned of the light and walked back over to the bed, “Wear your shirt to bed please,” I said before he climbed in the bed with me.

“Why?” he asked.

“I love the smell of your shirt,” I smiled.

“You have to do something for me,” he said grabbing something off the floor, “put this on,” he said throwing me the Hot Topic bag that had lingerie in it.

“I can’t sleep in that. It’s not that comfy.”

“Then wear this and no shirt,” I laughed when he said that but it was fair. He threw me his boxers and I put them on quickly.

He hopped into bed with me. He copped a feel before I smelled his shirt like I was snorting cocaine, “I love the smell of you,” I said smiling.

“I love everything about you,” I was facing him and he kiss my lips then slowly went down my jaw line to my neck then back up, “I love you,” he said kissing me again.

I smelled his shirt like it was cocaine again and buried my face in his chest and fell asleep.