These Bright Lights Have Always Blinded Me

I sat in seventh period doodling whatever popped in my head. My hair fell in my face, blocking my view of the door. I was in the zone, doodling absentmindedly when I felt someone poked me in the arm. I looked up and moved my hair out of my face to see Tom. I just waved and went back to doodling.

“Hey, you okay?” he asked sitting next to me.

I nodded and continued doodling. He looked at what I was doodling and said, “Doesn’t seem like it.”

I was about to ask him why he thought that when I saw what I doodled. A sad girl with a rain cloud over her head and different lyrics written around it, most of them from songs Gerard wrote.

“I’m fine,” I said nonchalantly, “Don’t worry about me.”

He opened his mouth to say something when Kat walked in and sat next to him. Shit. I forgot she was in here.

I rolled my eyes and continued what I was doing when my pocket vibrated. I pulled it out and slid it open to see I had a new text message. I opened it and it was from Tom.

Tom: meet me @ my locker after skool.

Me: any reason?

Tom: because I can’t talk now.

Me: *sigh* I guess.

Tom: dankeschön Chelsea

Me: np.

I put my phone back in my pocket and went back to my doodling. I couldn’t help but look over at Tom out of the corner of my eye through my hair. A couple times I noticed him look over at me out of the corner of his eye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eighth period flew by quickly. I stood at my locker and gathered what all I needed to take home. I grabbed Jokie and my Anatomy book, putting the book in my book bag. I zipped it up, put Jokie around my neck and was about to close my locker when I felt someone poke me. I looked to see that it was Tom. I closed my locker and said, “Hey.”

“Hey,” he said, “Wanna walk with me?”

“I drove,” I replied.

“Oh. I would’ve, but my Escalade’s still in Germany. Gordon’s supposed to have it sent over,” he said.

“Cool,” I said, “Wanna ride back to your place?”

He nodded. “Thanks,” he said.

I grabbed my book bag and said, “No problem. Now let’s go.”

He nodded and the two of us walked out of the school. “So, which one’s yours?” he asked.

I pointed to the 1999 Mercury Cougar that I owned. “The pretty red/maroon colored car there.”

“It’s nice. What year is it?” he asked as we reached it.

“1999,” I replied.

I opened the trunk so we could put our stuff in it. “Nice,” he said putting his back pack in the trunk. I threw mine in there as well before closing it.

“Thanks,” I said before getting in my car. I put Jokie in his camera case and buckled it up.

“What are you doing?” Tom asked sitting in the passenger seat and buckling up.

“Buckling up Jokie. He’s my camera,” I replied before buckling myself in.

“Ah,” he said. I started the car up and “Durch den Monsun,” started playing. I pulled out of the parking lot when I noticed Tom doing what looked like playing guitar.

“You know this song?” I asked when I realized he must have, “Never mind. You’re from Germany. Of course you probably do. These guys are really popular over there.”

He nodded. “Yeah. They’re pretty cool guy,” he said.

We rode along, listening to the random mix I had in when Tom turned down the music. “Okay, so tell me what’s up,” he said.

“Nothing,” I replied, “Same shit different day.”

He looked at me like he was trying to read me. Not that it’s easy. No one’s been able to read how I really feel when I keep a straight face. “You’re upset about something. I can tell by your eyes. They look just as sad as they did seventh period,” he said.

Scheisse. Make up something quick! “I’m fine. Nothing’s wrong. I’m just peachy. Nothing’s bothering me. I don’t like anyone. Should I continue?” I asked.

He nodded. “Well, I’m not worried about anything happening right now. I’m perfectly content with everything, and that’s it,” I said.

He looked at me and said, “You’re not fine. Something’s wrong. You’re not “just peachy,” whatever that means. Something’s bothering you. You do like someone. You’re worried that something’s going to happen. You’re not perfectly content with everything, and that’s it.”

Damn. He’s good. Not going to admit it, though. “You think that Tom,” I said, “You hit the nail right on the head.”

He gave me directions to his house and we reached it five minutes later. “So, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said.

I nodded. “Yeah,” I said.

“Thanks for the ride,” he said, “I owe you one. As soon as my Escalade arrives, you’re the first to ride in it. I mean, besides Bill. But he’s family.”

I nodded. “Hey, want a ride to school tomorrow?” I asked.

He nodded. “We’d probably have to take Bill,” he said.

“That’s fine. Frank and Ali usually ride with me as well. They can deal if I leave a bit earlier than usual to get you guys.”

Tom smiled, his lip ring glistening in the sun. I felt my heart speed up. “That’ll work. Can I text you tonight?”

“Yeah. I’ll most likely be doing homework.”

“What classes?”

“Anatomy and Photography,” I replied, “I have the whole semester to finish the project, but I want to get it done so that way it’s finished.”

“Cool. Hey, if I have any problems with the Anatomy, can I call you?”

“Sure thing.”

He smiled. “Dankeschön Chelsea. I’ll talk to you later.”

I popped open the trunk for him and said, “Later.”

He smiled and leaned in before hugging me. I hugged him back and we stayed that way for a bit before we stopped and he got out of my car. He walked to my trunk and grabbed his back pack, closing my trunk for me as well. He flashed me one last smile before walking up towards his house. I smiled a real smile for the first time today before heading off back to my house.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was sitting in my room working on my Anatomy homework when my phone rang. I looked and didn’t recognize the number. I slid it open and asked, “Hello?”

“Chelsea?” a male voice asked.

“Yeah. Who is this?”

“Tom.”

“Oh. Hi. Sorry. I don’t have your number saved in my phone.”

“That’s fine. I actually got your number from Bill. I forgot that I didn’t have your number.”

“Sorry. I should have told you it.”

“It’s okay. So, do you understand the homework?”

“A bit. Why?”

“I’m having trouble understanding the instructions. I’m so used to reading German that reading in English all the time is so confusing.”

I explained to him what the instructions were saying. “Oh. Okay. I asked Bill and he was no help whatsoever.”

I laughed. “I’m sorry Dready.”

“It’s fine. Stop apologizing. You don’t need to.”

“Sor--I mean, okay.”

He laughed. “Good girl. You don’t have to apologize all the time. But I bet it’s out of habit, right?”

“Yeah,” I said completely abandoning my homework, “I’m just so used to doing it that I don’t realize how much I say it.”

“Understandable,” he said.

We were silent for a minute when I asked, “Are you sitting with us at lunch tomorrow?”

“Yeah. I told Kat that I’d alternate between sitting with her and sitting with you guys. She wasn’t too happy about it, but she gave in and is tolerating it.”

“Good. Because Ali might just have to steal you if you weren’t.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. And I maybe would help. Depends on what I’m doing.”

“Understandable.”

We talked for a while when I looked at the clock. “Heilige scheisse Tom. It’s eleven o’clock,” I said.

“23 Uhr?” he asked, “Wow. Well, what time will you be by tomorrow?”

“Seven.”

“Alrighty then. I’ll see you at seven tomorrow. Gute Nacht schön,” he said.

I smiled. “Gute Nacht Tom. See you tomorrow.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

I waited for him to hang up. “Are you still there?” he asked.

“Yeah. Just waiting for you to hang up.”

“Why me? Why not you?” he asked, a smile evident in his tone of voice.

“Because I’m the awesome American girl that you hang out with and because I’m older.”

“Birthday?”

“Halloween.”

“Ha! September 1.”

“Scheisse Tom! No fair!

“So hang up.”

“I hate hanging up first though.”

“So? How about we hang up at the same time.”

“Or talk until one of our phones dies. That way, we don’t have to hang up.”

“You know, I like your thinking.”

“Me, too. No one else seems to though.”

“Well, they’re odd if they don’t.”

“I totally agree,” I said.

We continued to talk on the phone until my phone was about dead and I fell asleep, Tom’s voice being the last thing I heard.