It's Our Last Chance to Feel Again

KATHERINE

The cold air that clawed mercilessly at my skin never felt better, and in all honesty, it probably never would. Not unless I had Jacob to make the wind seem like nothing more than moving air.

I tried to ignore the sharp edges that pricked at the soles of my feet with each step I took, and even though it wasn’t succeeding, I continued running, picking up my pace with each step until I was crying from the pain. I didn’t need to stop for a rest, nor did I need to check on my feet. All I needed was to keep running until I reached Jacob. I kept my father in mind, remembering how he had lost Julia because he hadn’t said anything earlier, and it fueled me to run. To run towards the furry monster I so dearly needed.

Of course I had no idea where I was going, or where I was supposed to go. All I knew was that I had to find Jacob, and it was probably because of my sheer determination that I had fooled myself into thinking that my gut feeling would show me the way to Jacob simply because we were imprints.

I knew better, obviously. I knew that wasn’t how imprinting worked, but it sure as hell beat running into the woods without any proper reason for doing so.

I kept at my run, having reached the fastest speed I could move, and looked around for any sign of human-eating vampires or wolves that were unbelievably huge.

The wind continued to scratch at me, continued to blow against me in a feeble attempt to slow me down. But I wouldn’t have it. I was going to see Jacob, whether or not the wind was on my side.

It took a while more of persistent running, but I finally found myself looking at a trail of paw prints. Following the trail with both my eyes and my ever-moving legs, I smiled when I saw what I had been looking for. Two wolves stood in front of me, sniffing the air for, I assumed, the scent of the vampires.

The trees that stood tall seemed to swallow my presence in the woods, but didn’t make the large wolves any less magnificent. The last time I had seen the werewolves was when I had been stuck in the woods and under the impression that I was about to die, which clouded my mental image of the wolves and had morphed it into one of ferocious beasts who were constantly salivating and had scars on their face.

But with the new-found knowledge that the werewolves were no more dangerous than a wounded fly (or at least they weren’t supposed to be to a human), I found myself appreciating every minor detail about them: The way their fur didn’t seem to be affected by the wind that was trying to blow my hair out of my scalp, the way they stood tall with their snouts in the air, the way their paws seemed to dig into the dirt below, as if rooting themselves into the ground should they need to look menacing.

They stopped sniffing after a while, and I panicked. What if they had caught my scent and were now going to send me back to Uncle Jack’s house? I froze on the spot, holding even my breath (which was unbelievably hard to do because of how out of breath I was from the long distance sprinting I had done) in a lame attempt to keep myself hidden from them. I didn’t want to have willingly put myself through physical torture only to be forced to return back to where I had started from.

However, all that panicking had proved to be for nothing because as suddenly as they had stopped sniffing the air, they began running, moving as swiftly as you would expect a cheetah to, further in the woods.

I held back my sigh of relief (who knew how sensitive the wolves’ hearing were) and as carefully as I could, ran behind the fast moving wolves. It was hard, having to keep an eye out for both the wolves and the ground to make sure I didn’t trip on anything, but I sucked it up. After everything I had put Jacob through — the kicking him out of my room because I had wrongfully thought he had imprinted on someone else was one fine example — the least I could do in return was to run through the woods as quickly and quietly as possible so that I could tell him I knew he had imprinted on me.

Though the plan of finding him in the woods had, evidently, not been very well thought through, the one thing I had carefully planned was what I was going to tell him when I saw him.

But now that everything was working fine, and I was mere minutes away from seeing him, I realised that simply telling him I knew I was his imprint was not a good enough reason to be risking my life by following two monsters into the woods where a fight was going to take place. I slowed down temporarily, my lungs heaving in gratitude for the well-deserved break I was giving them as I slowly began to doubt myself.

No, I thought to myself, ignoring the pain that burned through my thighs and lungs, as if trying to punish me for having ran so long. I had made it so far, and I wasn’t going to give in just because I was tired and doubted my impulsive decision.

No, I repeated mentally. I was going to continue on and find Jacob. Even if it meant coming face-to-face with the vampires.

---

“Oh… My God,” I panted, placing my hands on my knees for balance.

I had stopped running quite some time ago, but it had taken me a long time to regain enough breath to even exclaim how out of breath I was.

The moment the words left my mouth, every member of the pack, who was standing in front of me, snapped their heads around and stared at me with wide eyes that brought a nervous smile to my face.

“What is she doing here?!” A beautiful, but scarily fierce voice demanded, and I looked around at the wolves with sheer amazement. I hadn’t known the wolves were able to speak while in wolf form.

“She’s… Human,” Another voice said, and even though I was sure I hadn’t heard it in recently, it sounded very familiar.

Figuring that it wasn’t the wolves who had spoken, I peered over their tall bodies and found myself facing two of the flawless hikers from the woods, with four other people who looked as beautiful as they did. I frowned for a moment, wondering why their main worry was a sweaty human who was clearly out of breath when they were standing in the middle of the woods with a group of large wolves facing them.

After a brief period of wondering, the answer hit me so hard that it was a good enough punishment for being so slow. Those hikers were vampires. No matter how excited I was about my newfound knowledge, I pushed the epiphany aside and focused on the main thing I had ran into the woods for: Jacob.

"Where's Jacob?" I demanded, and I could've sworn I saw the wolves roll their eyes while the vampires, whom I'm guessing were the Cullens, hissed.

Their hissing continued for a while and, still on the tip of my toes, I saw Jasper looking incredibly constipated, while Pixie, the female vampire from the woods, and another female vampire, who looked as harmless and gentle as Pixie, held him back with frowns on their faces. Added with the looks of urgency the wolves were throwing at me, I guessed that Jasper was trying very hard not to murder me so that he could drink my blood.

I don't know what happened to me then, but the fear I should have felt never came and instead, a great amount of courage took its place. I felt it pulsate in my every tissue, and I soon heard myself threatening the Cullens. "If you're trying to scare me off, it's really not working. Kill me if you will, I frankly don't care. But if you so much as touch a single strand of fur on Jacob, or any of the other wolves, I will make sure that you'll suffer for the rest of your pathetic lives. Living or dead, I will make sure you see my face every single night, and I will make sure you hate every moment of it."

At this point, the vampire who had an undeniable beauty that screamed louder than the other vampires snarled, and the werewolves huddled closer together and stood taller, looking as if they were ready to fight back should the beautiful vampire attack.

I knew I should've slowly backed away because the vampire, in all honesty, looked extremely scary and angry, but my pride and courage wouldn't let me do that. Instead, I scoffed, "Well 'raaah' to you too. So you've got fangs and a need to drink my blood. Big whoop. I've got blood flowing through my every vein which makes you so weak you can't even control yourself. I've got the ability to feel my heart break, to feel it slowly mend, to feel the pain when it starts to beat really fast around Jacob. Plus I've got the werewolves on my side. And as I recall, they were made to destroy you."

By then, the vampire was beyond livid, and I guessed that if her face were able to flush with anger, it would've done just that. The vampire with the huge muscles, who in all honesty scared me quite a bit, held onto her waist and from the iron grip he had, I figured that he was doing me a huge favour by preventing her from attacking me.

While most of the werewolves were looking at me with what I would assume was pride, this one werewolf who stood in the front was looking at me differently, and I couldn't quite place what emotion it was. It didn't bother me for too long, though, because I looked back up and continued, "I don't know much about you, and quite honestly, I don't really want to. Your type have killed my dad's fiancé, and so I really don't trust you. If it were up to me, the werewolves wouldn't even be fighting this. Okay well, Jacob wouldn't. But of course, it's not up to me. I wasn't even aware of this stupid fight until a few days ago.

"So since it's going to happen whether or not I like it, I'll just say this: Don't you dare turn your backs on the wolves. Don't you fucking dare do anything to harm them. I meant what I said about making you pay."

The werewolves continued to look at me, but this time, their faces were just as unreadable as the werewolf who stood in front of the pack. Remembering that they couldn't speak, I looked back up at the vampires. Some of them looked at me with anger, while the others looked at me with disbelief.

It was quiet for a while, which I felt gave my threat the air of superiority, before the tallest vampire took it upon himself to clarify their position in the fight. "My name is Carlisle Cullen, and while I am aware that you don't care much for that piece of information, I would like you to know it nonetheless. My family and I have asked for the pack's participation in the fight not because we want them dead, but because we know that they are capable of defending this area and the people living in it. We are truly grateful for their agreement to help, and we would never want to break this trust that we have temporarily instilled between us.

"I understand why you would feel wary of us, but trust me when I say that not every vampire feeds on human blood like the group of vampires that killed your dad's fiancé. Some of us have adopted the "vegetarian" diet, as I like to call it. We feed on animals, and would never kill an innocent human for their blood. And since the werewolves are part human, we would never kill them. We are here for only one purpose, and that is to make sure that Bella is safe. Rest assured, we have no other motives."

I stared at him blankly for a while, partly because I had no idea what to say, and partly because I was generally curious. Did all vampires talk that formally? I guess it did make them seem very composed and somewhat awesome, but I wasn't falling for it. They were still murderers.

Eventually, I stiffly thanked him, and a silence once again surrounded us. I suppose it was because of the sudden disappearance of the courage that had powered me to threaten the Cullens with complete disregard for anything other than Jacob and the pack's safety, but it took a long time for me to think of why I was in the woods.

After a period of convincing myself that I hadn't ran into the woods simply to threaten the Cullens, the answer finally hit me. I was just about to ask the one question that would lead me to finally being able to relieve myself of the knowledge that Jacob had imprinted on me, when every single being in the woods that stood before me snapped their heads to look at me with alarm.

Carlisle then shouted, "Someone take her away as quickly as possible!"

The wolf closest to me turned its body around and leant forward so that its whiskers were tickling my cheek while I frantically repeated the three questions, "Why? What's going on? Where's Jacob?"

The vampire who stood beside Carlisle, the one who had held Jasper back along with Pixie just a few moments ago, gently answered, "The vampires. They've reached. They're very near," which greatly contrasted my frantic calls, embarrassing me quite a bit.

By the time the wolf had managed to nudge me enough times to knock the knowledge that I should be climbing on its back into my head, it was too late because I was soon staring into the cold, blood red eyes of a group of pale beings who looked almost as beautiful as the Cullens did.

The courage that had suddenly flowed through me before never returned, and the fear that should have rightfully overwhelmed me now ran through my body. Taking three big steps back, I stared in fear at the many vampires and hoped against reality that I wouldn't die before I got to at least tell Jacob I knew.

---

Everything happened fast. Too fast for me to properly grasp. It might have been my mind playing tricks on me, or it might have been the fact that I was a mere human while every other thing surrounding me was supernatural, but the fact still remained: No matter how hard I tried, everything was a blur that couldn't be distinguished as it whizzed past me.

I didn't know how or what or why or where. All I knew was that there was a lot of growling, a lot of snapping and a lot of shrieks of pain.

I couldn't tell if the shrieks were from the wolves or the Cullens or the ruthless vampires, but it didn't stop me from fearfully cheering the wolves on. It all happened in my mind, of course. I was too afraid to make any noise that would have brought attention to me.

I'd thought about death before. Nothing serious, nothing dark. It was more a brief curiosity about what would happen before and after I died- Nothing abnormal.

But with death happening right in front of me, I began to wonder more about death. Was it worth dying for someone? Should anyone have to die for someone? Or should they only die for themselves?

I suppose that before I had arrived at La Push, before the previous weeks had happened, I would have given a straight and definite answer of how everyone should live and die for only themselves. But right now, now that everything that happened happened, now that I knew that there was a whole lot more to life than simply being smart and excelling in my studies, I wasn't so sure.

Would dying for someone make death any less different? Would dying for Jacob help him move on faster? Or would it simply be harder for him to accept that I was gone? If the roles were reversed, if Jacob were to die for me instead, would I feel better about his death? Or would I blame myself?

A sudden snap right in front of my face brought me out of my daze, and I stared hard to grasp what was happening right before my eyes.

I still couldn't see faces more than blurs, but I could definitely make out the pair of red eyes that stared at me with a great amount of need. Stricken, I took another step back which ultimately proved to be a bad move because the exposed root of the tree beside me caused me to lose my footing, and I fell clumsily to the ground. I wasn't bleeding, of course, but my legs were still aching from the long distance sprinting I had put myself through, and now that I was on the ground, I wasn't quite sure how I was supposed to get back up.

I knew I had to though, and I tried as much as I could to stand. Realising that I was too weak to so much as crawl, I began feeling the helplessness set in, and I was soon holding back tears.

This was the moment in all Hollywood movies where the hero would swoop in and kill all the bad guys with one hand, while he held the distressed damsel in the other. But real life never turned out like the movies no matter how hard we wished it would, and I knew that Jacob wouldn't come swinging on a vine to save my butt. I knew that I was alone in this fight, and I had to somehow keep myself alive.

Before I could let myself think more about where Jacob was or what he could possibly be doing if he weren't fighting off the scary vampires with the rest of his pack and the Cullens like he should have been, something miraculous happened.

The blurs became solid images. Solid images that seemed frozen. It took me a while to realise it, but I found that every single being was staring at the same spot. Every vampire had a ravenous look in his or her eye, while every werewolf looked on with alarm and fear.

I wasn't sure how I knew, but I did, and I could sense that the thing they were staring at was bad. Dreadfully, I turned my head around and whimpered when I finally knew what every single thing was staring at.

He came. He came for me.

The tears that streamed freely down my cheeks were of joy and relief. Pure joy, and utter relief. But then the complete image sank in, and I found out why the wolves were so afraid.

He was bleeding. He held a blade in his hand. A blade stained with blood. His blood. And the painful cut that ran down his arm held no hesitation in exposing his blood to the thirsty vampires.

It didn't matter how much I screamed. No amount of distraction would be able to get the vampires' attention. Not when a fresh wound was so openly displayed. I knew what he was doing. I knew why he was doing it, and as much as I was appreciated what he was doing, I wished he never came. I didn't want his plan to succeed. I didn't want him to die. I didn't want him to die for me.

It was way too early, way too soon for him to die. I hadn't even gotten to know him properly. Hadn't even gotten to brag about him.

I wanted him around. Around me as often as he possibly could be.

I was sure everything was happening as a blur, but my mind was suddenly able to filter everything, to see what was going on.

And I watched.

Watched as he made another deep and long cut on his arm.

Watched as he winced and cried from the pain.

Watched as his blood coated the bloodstained blade.

Watched as his blood continued to rush out of his vessels and into open air.

Watched as the wolves tried their hardest to block off the vampires that wanted nothing more than his blood.

Watched as some of the Cullens slowly backed away, while Carlisle and the most gorgeous vampire stayed and fought the red-eyed freaks off.

Watched as a newborn vampire got past the barricade the wolves had attempted to form.

Watched as more newborns followed.

Watched as they reached him.

Watched as they bit into his flesh and tore it apart.

And I screamed.

Screamed as hard as I possibly could.

Screamed as loud as I wanted to.

Screamed for as long as my lungs would allow.

Screamed for hope.

Screamed for tears.

Screamed for a miracle.

Screamed for a chance.

And I cried.

Cried for the inevitable.

Cried for the loss.

Cried for the life that was leaving his body.

Cried for everyone who had to die for another.

And finally, when I couldn't take anything anymore, I looked at his lifeless body, and crumpled to the ground, not caring if I were to die.

He was gone, and he had taken a part of me along with him, whether I liked it or not.