For Once Upon A Time

The pirates and other assorted characters from this story quickly charged up the black stone steps, roaring a battle cry. About halfway up the mountain, however, they began coughing and wheezing and decided to calmly walk the rest of the way. When they finally reached the top of the staircase, they stood before the large castle. It was built gothically and completely out of the same black stone that the mountain was made out of. In front of the castle doors, stood two guards. As always, they were a ninja and a clown.

"This is it, men!" Bloodstump yelled. "An everlasting war between ninja and pirates has been waged for thousands of years and although it won't end tonight, let's still kill us some ninja!" The pirate crew cheered in agreement and drew their weapons. The whole party then charged forward, quickly overtaking the ninja and clown guard and pushing their way into the castle.

The inside of the castle, as with the outside, was built very elegantly out of black stone. The room they were in now had very little furniture, other than a grand staircase at the opposite side of the room. The rest of the space was very open, but not empty, as it was currently being guarded by Bob's vast army of ninja and clowns. No one moved, however. They just stared at each other. Pirates stared at ninja. Ninja stared at pirates. Clowns stared at ninja staring at pirates staring at ninja. Then, someone coughed and war broke out.

Sharptooth charged forward first, shoving his cutlass deep into one of the clown's stomach. A ninja then swung his sword at Parrotface's arm, cutting in deeply. Blood, swords and rainbow afros quickly filled the room, turning it into a large Picasso of war. A ninja was shot down from afar. A pirate fell, crushed by a large red shoe. Agent three took a sword into his side, but kept on fighting. A clown fell, with Fredward biting deeply into his neck. Screecher attacked one of the ninja's faces, scratching and biting him fiercely.

"Quickly, Michael!" Yelled Bloodstump. "We've got this place taken care of. Find Bob and stop the machine!" Bloodstump then drew his sword and severed a clown's head from his body, shortly before he, too, was lost in the fray. Not wasting any time, Michael hurriedly ran around the mini-war and up the grand staircase. After that, he entered a maze of corridors. He hurried quickly down each of them, until the sounds of battle could no longer be heard. Finally, Michael came to another staircase that twisted straight up towards the top of the castle. Before he could begin to climb it, however, a ninja came running down the stairs.

The ninja didn't seem to notice Michael, at first, who was standing off towards the side of the hallway, but as soon as he did, he drew his sword and pointed it at Michael's throat. Not being trained in the art of combat, Michael fought the only was he knew how. Using a tactic that Jamall seemed to have found useful, Michael powerfully kicked the ninja between his legs and watched as he fell to the ground grabbing his crotch. Michael then reached down and pulled the sword from the ninja's hand, running up the staircase shouting, "Sorry for the cheap shot!"

Once at the top of the staircase, Michael faced another hallway and spent no time just standing around. He ran down it as fast has he could, hoping not to run into another ninja or clown. Unfortunately, on the other side of the door at the end of the hall, stood another ninja... and it was one Michael knew.

"Hello, Mikey." Jamall said. He was now dressed the same as the other ninja, with black clothes and a red headband.

"Jamall, just let me through. We're friends, remember? We can't do this." Michael ordered, raising his sword clumsily towards Jamall.

"I'm sorry, Mikey, but you should have switched teams when you had the chance. There's no way I'm letting you through. But because of the fact that we did become friends, I'll give you one more chance to just walk away... otherwise, I'll have no choice but to stop you." Jamall drew the sword from his back.

"I can't walk away." Michael told him. "Not after everything that's happened. Not after everything we've been through. The keys and the islands and the danger... after all that, there's no longer a choice for me. I'm going to stop the machine. Now let me through."

"I knew you'd say that, Michael. You were never one to just give up. But be warned, I'm much better with this weapon than you are... you don't stand a chance."

"We'll see about that!" Michael challenged, swinging the sword straight down towards Jamall's head. Jamall easily blocked however and came back at Michael with a fast string of attacks. Michael tried the best he could to block each one, but couldn't match Jamall's ninja speed and finally took a blow to his side. Michael fell sideways into the arch of the doorway, they'd been standing in. He knew there wasn't enough space to fight in. Knowing that he had to make it into the other room, Michael suddenly lunged at Jamall, pushing him backwards and into the next room.

Jamall then fell on his back, allowing Michael a moment to examine his surroundings. The room they were in was very large and empty, about the size of a foot ball field, with an incredibly high ceiling. To his left, was the object he'd been searching for. It was an immense machine that was very hard to describe, with lots of pipes, tubes, wires and metal plating covering it all over. To Michael's right, was a second floor, which was about twenty feet higher than the main floor and completely open. There was only one staircase leading up to it and just a railing running along the side, to keep people from falling off. On the second floor at the far end of the room, was a door and a control panel, probably the one to control the machine. Behind the control panel, was a large window; the only source of illumination for the room.

In between the machine and second floor, was the main area of the room and it was completely empty... except for Jamall lying on the floor. He didn't remain there long, however, as he quickly jumped off his back and onto his feet, slowly spinning the sword around in his hand. Jamall started attacking Michael again and this time, Michael didn't have the strength to block for very long. The wound in his left side was hurting and caused him to let his guard down, allowing Jamall to hit him in the same spot again, knocking him to the ground. As Michael lay there, clutching his bloody wound, Jamall raised his sword above his former comrade.

"No! Wait!" Michael begged. "We're friends, remember Jamall? We even traded Pokemon cards with each other! Doesn't that mean anything?"

"You said you'd never speak of that!" Jamall yelled. "I'm too old for Pokemon... and a ninja! That was supposed to be a secret!" Jamall lowered his sword, more concerned with defending his honor than his life. Michael took this opportunity to raise his own sword and push with all his might into Jamall's stomach. Jamall was instantly stunned, staring questioningly down at the weapon inside of him. Michael's side was still hurting badly, but he ignored it and pushed the sword even farther into Jamall. He started coughing, as blood dripped from his mouth and fell backwards.

Michael instantly pulled the sword from his friend and fell to his knees, crying. "I'm... I'm so sorry, Jamall." Michael stammered. "I-I-I d-didn't have a... a choice." Michael picked up his friend's head and held it in his lap.

"Hey... Michael?" Jamall whispered in a confused and dazed voice.

"What is it?" Asked Michael quietly, still crying.

"You know... you know how you--" Jamall broke into a fit of coughing, blood still dripping from his mouth. He continued. "You know how... you used to always say... that Pikachu was your favorite Pokemon?"

"Yeah..." Michael agreed.

"Well... I never told you... but I think... Pikachu's kind of... stupid." Jamall exhaled one last time and died.

Michael tilted his head back and screamed, "Nooo!" Into the echoing room.

"Now, now, now, it isn't that bad, kid... at least, not bad enough that the situation calls for a dramatic scream into the sky." Michael lay Jamall's body down and looked up to see Bob walking down the steps from the second level.

"I'll kill you and I'll destroy your stupid machine!" Michael screamed, picking up his bloody sword. "Because of you, I've lost two of my friends!"

"Hey, hey, hey, this isn't my fault. I didn't kill Jane or Jamall. You did that to both of them. If you're going to drive that sword through anyone, I think you should do us all a favor and do it to yourself."

Michael screamed one more time and charged Bob, running the sword through him with all his strength. Instantly, however, Michael was surprised. Bob's body didn't feel soft like a normal person's. It was hard and made a screeching and crunching noise when the sword entered. Michael pulled out the sword and stared at Bob. He hadn't even flinched. Why would he, though? His body was made out of metal.

"You're a... machine?" Michael asked. "But... the scientist... he told us he made you."

"That's because he's working for me, Michael. He told you everything I told him to tell you. What? You actually thought it was possible to genetically engineer a ninja-clown hybrid? That technology is at least five more years away. It's much easier to just build a look-a-like out of metal."

"But... why'd you have him set us free... and give me plans to destroy the machine?"

"Because, Michael, it's so much more crushing to see yourself defeated when you're so close to victory... and I want to see you crushed." Bob grabbed Michael's shirt collar and threw him to the ground.

"That's enough! Power down." Commanded a voice. Bob's eyes grew dark and he slumped over. Michael looked up to see a figure standing on the second floor, next to the control panel. His face was covered by a shadow. Michael slowly stood and stepped around Bob to reach the staircase. He took the few steps to the top of the second floor and walked down it, until he was a few feet from the control panel and the mysterious figure.

"Who are you?" Michael asked, for the last time.

"I'm the real person running the show, Michael." He said. "Do you remember when Dr. Frank Shelley told you the story of why he created Bob?"

"Yeah." Said Michael. "He said he was an up and coming mad scientist, who was approached on the street one night and was asked to build Bob."

"And you never wondered what kind of person wanted Bob to be constructed... what kind of things he had planned for him?"

"Well... no." Michael admitted. "We were more focused on Bob at the time."

"That's too bad Michael. But regardless, it doesn't matter. I was the one who ordered Bob to be built and I was the one who ordered the machine to be built... and lucky for you, you'll be able to witness the end of the world from the exclusive front row seat. Are you ready to see the end of all popsicles?"

"No!" Michael yelled. "Why are you doing this... why? That's all I've ever wanted to know... why do you want to destroy the world?"

"Oh, Michael... it was never about destroying the world... I could care less about the world... which is, in fact, why I'm destroying it, but regardless! This is about something much bigger than destroying the world... it's about what I want... it's about what I've always wanted... ever since page one."

Michael stared at the shadowed figure, the gears in his head slowly starting to turn. "What exactly is it that you want?" Michael asked, speaking slowly.

"All I ever wanted was to be a main character! Don't you understand Mike? I just wanted to be a main character! I wanted people to notice me! But no! All I was good for was starting off this story and creating the basis of the setting... I even said I'd probably never be heard from again... but here I am! Here I am, Michael! I'm back in the story!"

Michael suddenly realized who it was, just as his former classmate, Tim, stepped out of the shadows and into the light. "You don't need to do this!" Michael shouted. "It's not too late! I can make you a main character!"

"It is too late, Michael! The machine's already been started. The only thing that can stop it now is this conveniently placed self-destruct button." Tim said, motioning towards a conveniently placed, bright red self-destruct button.

"Why'd you install a self-destruct button?" Michael asked.

"I didn't... apparently it just comes standard when you order an evil lair."

"Oh, I see." Michael said. Both of them stood there in silence for a few seconds, not moving. Suddenly Michael jumped forward and landed his hand down on the red button.

"Do you know what you've just done!" Screamed Tim. "You're going to kill us all! Everyone in this place will die... all of your friends and you!"

"We all came here willing to make a sacrifice." Michael explained. "At least I'll die knowing I saved the world."

"No!" Screamed Tim again. "Do you actually know what you've done?" Michael looked confused. "That wasn't a self-destruct button! That was the activation button!" Michael stepped backwards, sweating, his breathing suddenly starting to increase. "I mean, who would actually install a self-destruct button? That's just stupid."

"You... you mean... that I..."

"Yes, Michael... I, the villain, just tricked you, the hero, into destroying the entire world. Aren't I a genius?" Michael looked over at the large machine as it roared to life. Tim laughed maniacally, as a wave of heat, hot enough to melt the planet, ripped across the entire world, destroying everything in its path. The popsicles didn't stand a chance.